A weekend in the life of a long distance cyclist, the sexy side we want to keep a secret!!!
First step get up silly o’clock and head off to the breeding ground of likeminded species (aka the start control), gather round and spread tales of woe about a ‘front’ moving in while cramming in the final feed before the migration begins.
The big boss man (YLG) sounds the off and the flock ‘click’ in unison and head south for the rich grazing of a mythical place called ‘Preston’
Along the way they fight headwinds, cross winds and tail winds (these usually come after the food stops).
Impromptu stops to try on new clothes and deciding what goes with what weather in lay-bys all over the land, all very tough for the fashion conscious cyclist. In the end we just wear everything to keep warm (and wet of course).
Words of encouragement from people along the route, bon courage, or as it translates into English f’off, a’hole and grow up to name a few !!
Driven on by hunger we reached the ‘Promised Land’ and food a plenty is gleefully accepted. Care has to be taken not to get to close while feeding as similar to a dog a low growl is heard if any attempt is made to remove food from the table
What now? Well to heck with it let’s do it all again, the word is that there is more food to be had on the way back from whence we came.
Of course with this life come the groupies, a man who if he can’t take part heads off in to the wind and rain finding the most challenging terrain to stand and film others grovelling in enjoyment (train spotter of the Audax world??). Not just from this land but from far off shores they come, resting at one of our secret watering holes (AKA Johnstone Bridge services), another needs to take our picture to show his buddies back in Florida - this is winter time? (summer for us we reply).
It’s all over we’ve spurned sleep, worn the same clothes for two days, all of them, shied away from washing now it’s time to go home and tell the loved ones we’ve had a ‘good’ weekend.
Mondays at work are for resting, the boss understands doesn’t he??
