Bloody cat
Middle of the night I can hear a thumping and squealing. She's obviously caught something.
It is cold and I can't be arsed to catch it and clear it up. Go back to sleep.
Morning - no half-eaten animal debris anywhere. Odd.
By about 4pm, I realise she hasn't moved from the emergency guest folding mattress all day. Suspicious.
I look down the back - there is a large and very alive rat.
Pull out mattress, cat pounces . . . and completely fails to kill rat, which runs over my bare feet and goes under a large heavy cabinet.
There follows a keystones cop comedy where I poke out rat with stick, cat pounces, fails to kill it, rat runs over my bare feet (seriously, what is it with rats and feet? Thank crunchy I'm not wearing flares), circuits the room and goes under cabinet again.
I let dog in. His eyesight isn't great, and he just can't spot rat.
Eventually, I catch rat in cardboard box. Take it outside where the dog immediately pounces on it and puts an end to the bloody saga.
Question is; if the cat is so bloody useless at killing rats, how did she catch it, carry it in through two catflaps and up a flight of stairs?