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The Cool Wall - results


Seriously UncoolUncoolCoolSub-ZeroThorn touring bikes"Super" Mario CipolliniBrooks B17Lady CampagnoloSPD sandalsWhite bikesBromptons531ClarksonWhyte BikesLo-pro barsRecumbent bicyclesrogerzillaSTI road leversFlapjackA frozen beard1Spokey DokesDawes GalaxyBrooks SwiftBlack Scotchliteâ„¢Bibshorts/tightsCarbon frames & componentsBob Jackson VigorelliSporksCoolnessyACF2Downtube shiftersRear brakes on fixiesClown BikesMudflapsBrooks Team ProfessionalYACF ModeratorsTrekking/Butterfly handlebarsBoardman bikesRaleighyACF2Banana GuardsBeing The Member Of A Cycling Club8Boris Bikes5mm allen keysHelmetsRichard HammondMudguardsCarradiceYACF Cool WallLondon-BrightonTitaniumGeorge Berwick5YouChaintugsyACF2Hokeyspokes6Self-tapping screwsAssosAudaxScarsyACF2LeftiesA-head headsetsCampag Ergopower Shiftersbobb's hair7Your name on your bikeCamelback Podium bottlesTEA LycraAssos PedalsSpokeyReynolds 953/Columbus XCrAurumania Gold Bike Crystal EditionCannondale HooliganQuill stemsCampagnolo Delta BrakesShimano road chainsets3Commuting in club kitCompact framesRiding to and from PBPPedanticness4Charge PlugRiding fixed anywhere but LondonRaleigh Choppers (original)Riding fixed in LondonSustransBasketsTaking your dog on the Dun RunRaphaConti UltraHamsterSkinsDon BlackDe Rosa bikesRiding on the pavement9Naked Baba GanoushSturmey Archer HubsJack EasonBSOsColoured anodisingSmilies :)Orange bikesRed light jumpingwashingmachinepostSideways luggageCyclists' tansRaleigh Choppers (2000s re-release)Matching captain and stoker outfitsJames MayWindcheetahTrade topsPinarello DogmaDunwich Dynamobobb's hatRainlegsWinter cycling capsHetchinsChris HoyRadcliffe and MaconieMainstream Film Industry Depiction of CyclingZefal hpXFully loaded touringCapesChristmasDinotte lights (original)Marco PantaniTactical votingSnot rocketsBianchi celesteCakeKOTM socksRiding no-handsThe G TurnElectric motorcyclesGiletsFolding, fully suspended ICE TrikeGT brakesBelt driveMapsCurmudgeonsMTB riser barsVictoria PendletonHeadbandsBar ends with riser barsNaming your bike12HipstersGreg LeMondBeryl Burton'Walking' the dog, on a bikeHope Vision 1Riding in the snowAdults using BMX for transport/shopping etc.11bobbOrdinaries14Really cut-down straight barsBrooks Merino JerseysAlfine 11 speed hubSpoke reflectorsWool jerseysLamping Piers MorganSpoke cardsTrackstandAmberwall tyresJames Martin13FlatlandCycling at nightSocks and sandalsBaggies over longsSean KellyPropstandsTrikes (any type)CampingMoaning about the Cool Wall29ersEros PoliWhite tyresFoskaLotus 108Allsop SoftridePhil WoodSlick tyresPlaying cards on your chainstaysMTB converted into hybridEl SupremoRoller brakesStudded snow tyresJens VoigtElectronic shiftingMTB converted to tourerNarwhalsAlleycatsMTB with dropped barsTufty the SquirrelCoversocksCrud Racer Mk2 guardsTrailerbikesFlying Gate Frames15Cycle clipsGPSVan Moof16On-One Il PompinoBlackadderKick standsBlack socksABBAPrunesOn-One InbredPhotovoltaic optoisolatorsTies with animals on themChromium platingVon BroadElliptical chainwheelsHugh PorterYACF jerseysKirk PrecisionPuerile innuendoMoulton Double PylonDisc brakes on the roadAudax UK websiteBroxBike Friday Two's DaySkidsBuffsNewton C21 tricycleHase PinoShaved LegsMixte framesSO @ XCeramic Bottom bracketsWinterBenotto bar tapeNiche activitiesHead-cams, Bike-cams and Helmet-camsFish finger sandwichesPashley roadstersMoisturiser for menbobb's new T-shirtBus sucking/slipstreaming
The BOOM BoxEarwigs10Beyond the fridgeBears


* 1. Moved from "Cool" - A frozen beard is by definition sub-zero. Otherwise it wouldn't be frozen… :P
* 2. If you're wondering about the assignment of letters from "yACF", it's all Kim's fault ;)
* 3. Actually categorised "Fugly as"
* 4. [sic]
* 5. Universally acknowledged to be so uncool he's off the scale and right back round to subzero so no poll required
* 6. Actually categorised "Way outa sight"
* 7. So bad it's not even worthy of "Seriously Uncool" - classified as "Wack"
* 8. Only just uncool.  Obviously Didcot Phoenix is cool, Rapha isn't
* 9. "Doesn't your mum let you ride on the road with the big boys?" coming a close second to "Seriously Uncool"
* 10. To be nuked from orbit as it's the only way to be sure
* 11. Mummy couldn't find you a grown-up's bike then?
* 12. You're all wrong
* 13. Counting "cockwomble" as "seriously uncool"
* 14. Only ignoramuses call them "penny farthings"
* 15. Just really ugly and odd
* 16. Seriously uncool and dorky


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