The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.

[ian]

7. Swimming pool. No I don't fucking know it's half term. Why would I? Not everyone has kids. I appreciate you have squirreled this information away in a cryptic PDF somewhere on your website (for some reason, they stopped making it available through a convenient mobile app, too easy I suppose).

8. Swimming pool pt 2. And why timetable all the kiddy and OAP sessions at lunchtime during half-term thus making the pool unavailable to people who might want to use it at the time when it's most likely to be convenient? Because, you know, some of work. Even during half-term.

[Guy]

Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk Head/Desk

Defence Information Infrastructure

That is all

[fuzzy]

A useful phrase CANNOT be formed using the three words Infrastructure, Defence and Information- you should be aware of this......

[Guy]

Dii (no, it's right) is what "they" named the oh-so-wonderful intranet webby stuffs that carries our gloriously-malfunctionous MOSS Sharepoint working (as if it ever did) areas and data storage stuffs.

I am in a bad place at the moment and this is making me cry. I want to go home.

[jsabine]

1. People with dogs. Yes, it's nice that your creature wants to charge at me while yapping. Firstly, when it does so, consider saying 'sorry', secondly consider keeping it on a lead since you evidently can't control it. Don't simply ignore your dog's behaviour or, even worse, say 'oh just be firm, he'll go away' because your little mutt is the size of a rugby ball and it's fucking tempting to treat it like one and send it with a firm kick flying into some Hampstead back garden.

But he's only playing, only being friendly. Didn't you know? Couldn't you tell?

[ian]

Indeed. Some bonkers old biddy on a mobility scooter channeling a rather perfect Barbara Woodhouse. BE FIRM, TELL HIM TO BACK AWAY she hollers as she trundles by. I'm looking down at a football-sized ball of yapping fluff and pondering if she means a firm kick.

[ian]

9. Snotgrot. My left nostril is blocked as a result of a cold I had at the weekend. But if I lie on my right-hand side, I can feel it pop and glug quite disgustingly through my head until it settles in my right nostril and ear. It's quite unpleasant. I wish it would go, I want to resume a two nostril service.

[fuzzy]

9. Snotgrot. My left nostril is blocked as a result of a cold I had at the weekend. But if I lie on my right-hand side, I can feel it pop and glug quite disgustingly through my head until it settles in my right nostril and ear. It's quite unpleasant. I wish it would go, I want to resume a two nostril service.

I find playing snot tennis on center court is quite entertaining. I am however, the proud owner of a quite sizable court so, that may explain the weird enjoyment I get from the feeling of the gloop crossing the 'net' as it goes from court to court.

[rafletcher]

1. People with dogs. Yes, it's nice that your creature wants to charge at me while yapping. Firstly, when it does so, consider saying 'sorry', secondly consider keeping it on a lead since you evidently can't control it. Don't simply ignore your dog's behaviour or, even worse, say 'oh just be firm, he'll go away' because your little mutt is the size of a rugby ball and it's fucking tempting to treat it like one and send it with a firm kick flying into some Hampstead back garden.

But he's only playing, only being friendly. Didn't you know? Couldn't you tell?

When my wife and I are out walking,and this happens, the owners tend to get a surprise. And I get deafened. My wife is terrified of dogs (yes, yes, we know they're all lovely playful things, except the ones that bite of course). If they even hint at running toward her, she freezes and screams involuntarily. Very loudly.

[ian]

I forget where it was (somewhere near Tadsworth, iirc), but out in the country the other week, we were taking a walk and some huge dog starts having a go outside its owner's house. Not a yappy little thing, but full-on agitated wookie, which was troubling enough that I armed myself with a suitable chunk of rock to brain it. The owner comes out and we asked her – perfectly politely – if she'd mind taking her dog in for a moment. Which seemed not unreasonable.

Her response, delivered in perfectly posh Surrey, was 'no, he's not going to hurt you.' So she should there while the dog barked and snarled at us. I should have bashed them both on the head.

I don't dislike dogs, but I got a nasty bite as a child, and thus I really dislike being charged or barked at by them. I don't fucking care if he's being friendly or not going to bite me.

[ElyDave]

Similar experience here.  Until I  know them I'm wary.

I was angling for unclipping my left foot and ready to give a clout on the nose to a great dane that came haring out of a front garden to chase me on the recumbent a few weeks ago

[davelodwig]

My dads springer spaniel does not like small yappy dogs either and has been known to stick a paw on them to stop them yapping and running around.

[Basil]

I'm distraught.  I just lit an fag with my rather over enthusiastic Zippo.  A gust of breeze caused the enfrazzlement of half my moustache on one side.
#badmoustacheday.

[Kim]

I'm distraught.  I just lit an fag with my rather over enthusiastic Zippo.  A gust of breeze caused the enfrazzlement of half my moustache on one side.
#badmoustacheday.

The only way to maintain decorum is to immediatey singe both eyebrows and apply soot in an everything-but-the-goggles pattern.  And keep it that way until the moustache grows back.

Probably best to stagger and pretend you're a bit deaf, too.

[Basil]

Erm.  Thanks Kim.   

[Kim]

Steampunk, innit.

[Basil]

Ah yes.  A big thing with my lads.  Goggles, waistcoats and guns feature a lot.   

[barakta]

I'm distraught.  I just lit an fag with my rather over enthusiastic Zippo.  A gust of breeze caused the enfrazzlement of half my moustache on one side.
#badmoustacheday.

Photos? 

Have you had to commit some act of moustache butchery to make it look not terrible? Or shock horror, go clean shaven?

[Basil]

Photos? 

Will not be happening.

Have you had to commit some act of moustache butchery to make it look not terrible? Or shock horror, go clean shaven?

Actually, it's not as bad as I thought.  Mrs B has done an evening up job and I think they'll allow me back in the pub.

[fuzzy]

Photos? 

Will not be happening.

Have you had to commit some act of moustache butchery to make it look not terrible? Or shock horror, go clean shaven?

Actually, it's not as bad as I thought.  Mrs B has done an evening up job and I think they'll allow me back in the pub.

With a blowtorch?

[barakta]

Photos? 

Will not be happening.

Can't blame me for trying 

Actually, it's not as bad as I thought.  Mrs B has done an evening up job and I think they'll allow me back in the pub.

Good one that Mrs B!

[Mr Larrington]

I'm distraught.  I just lit an fag with my rather over enthusiastic Zippo.  A gust of breeze caused the enfrazzlement of half my moustache on one side.
#badmoustacheday.

 Fortunately sparking up a tab while in the breeze generated by the fan in the Estate Office merely results in singed fingers.

[T42]

I added a 17€ profile copier to an order so as to push the total over 100€ and get free express delivery. It doesn't work worth a damn, and given the weight it'd cost 12€ plus bother to send it back. Bah.

[Ham]

Last night I was trying to get away "early" from work at 17:00, having arrived at 07:00 after a couple of 12  hour days beforehand. Only to get to the bike cage to find a knobhead had locked his and mine. Cue much faffage and getting to the verge of cutting my own rack (which was the the locked part).  I managed to contact him 45 minutes later, and he turned up to unlock.

"That was stupid" quoth he
"Yes" I said, "You are stupid, and to prove it you are stupid enough to leave your credit card in your saddle pack. Which at least let me find you."

[T42]

I wish the folk who man controls would peel the bananas before slicing them. Maybe some folk like eating banana skins, but I don't.