Grammar that makes you cringe

[Pickled Onion]

Oxford Dictionary gives that as a common accepted usage, and who would argue with them?

[citoyen]

Oxford Dictionary gives that as a common accepted usage, and who would argue with them?

Gives what exactly as a common accepted usage? I can’t think of any definition of enormity that seems applicable to funerals.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Pickled Onion is right.

1.1 (in neutral use) large size or scale.
‘I began to get a sense of the enormity of the task’

Usage
Enormity traditionally means ‘the extreme scale or seriousness of something bad or morally wrong’, as in residents of the town were struggling to deal with the enormity of the crime. Today, however, a more neutral sense as a synonym for hugeness or immensity, as in he soon discovered the enormity of the task, is common. Some people regard this use as wrong, arguing that enormity in its original sense meant ‘a crime’ and should therefore continue to be used only of contexts in which a negative moral judgement is implied. Nevertheless, the sense is now broadly accepted in standard English, although it generally relates to something difficult, such as a task, challenge, or achievement

https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/enormity

It seems I've become an old fuddy-duddy hyper-correct cringer (perhaps through overexposure to YACF?) and in addition have to cringe at my own cringe. My onions well and truly pickled!

[citoyen]

Look again at what Welby actually said. Is the large size or scale of the event really something he thinks about at every funeral?

[Cudzoziemiec]

He presumably doesn't think of every funeral as a crime or something morally wrong, and I doubt he spends every funeral thinking about having to conduct the Queen's funeral. Obviously not every funeral is large in number of mourners or any other measure of physical scale. I think what he thinks about is the enormous spiritual dimension of death.

[citoyen]

I presume he’s talking about the enormous responsibility of conducting a funeral but it’s clumsily expressed.

[Cudzoziemiec]

It's certainly clumsy! Enormity is probably a word best avoided for the next decade or however long it takes its meaning to become settled.

[T42]

Its meaning was settled. Sloppy nitwits have screwed it up.

[citoyen]

Its meaning was settled. Sloppy nitwits have screwed it up.

You've long since lost the fight on this one, I'm afraid. No point being a Canute about it.

[T42]

Yeah. They used to call Canutism "kicking against the pricks" but I'd prefer to give perpetrators one in the balls.

[Legs]

Everybody on GBBO last night referring to pastéis de nata as if it were singular.

Mind you, I'm the twat who asks for a panino at the sarnie shop...

[Cudzoziemiec]

We had 'obligated' a page or two back. I've been into a secondhand (ie charity) bookshop and come out with Bright Lights, Big City. Opening it at random, I was struck by

Objectively, you know that Elaine is desirable and you feel obligated to desire her.

[phantasmagoriana]

Mind you, I'm the twat who asks for a panino at the sarnie shop...

[T42]

We had 'obligated' a page or two back. I've been into a secondhand (ie charity) bookshop and come out with Bright Lights, Big City. Opening it at random, I was struck by

Objectively, you know that Elaine is desirable and you feel obligated to desire her.

American, 1984. It fits.

[Tim Hall]

Mind you, I'm the twat who asks for a panino at the sarnie shop...

I may have reported in this very thread the time I was in Waitrose. There was a sign on the cafe counter apologising for the lack of "sandwiche's, toastie's and panini's". This had been corrected with a finely wielded Sharpie, deleting the apostrophes and the unnecessary final "s" on panini.  This ties in well with the alleged "overheard in Waitrose" which got onto Twitter some time back: "Daddy, does Lego have a silent T, like Merlot?"

[Cudzoziemiec]

We had 'obligated' a page or two back. I've been into a secondhand (ie charity) bookshop and come out with Bright Lights, Big City. Opening it at random, I was struck by

Objectively, you know that Elaine is desirable and you feel obligated to desire her.

American, 1984. It fits.

From the same source:

The matter is still under advisement.

Ugly but, again, it fits.

[T42]

The NYT enjoins me to "play the crossword".  You don't play a crossword, you ninny, you DO a crossword. And the NYT specimens are pathetic.

[clarion]

I think you complete* a crossword


* whether you complete it or not

[T42]

Less common but yes. Or fill it in - I knew of one train commuter who used to fill in his Times crossword with unutterable* filth then toss the paper casually on the seat and walk out of the compartment, just for the fun of watching other passengers crane at his answers or even dive to pick it up before anyone else.

But play? Nyet.

*in those days, not now

[citoyen]

I knew of one train commuter who used to fill in his Times crossword with unutterable* filth then toss the paper casually on the seat and walk out of the compartment, just for the fun of watching other passengers crane at his answers or even dive to pick it up before anyone else.

I used to do this with the Evening Standard crossword back when I was a regular commuter. It's a shite crossword so this is a lot more fun than filling it in with the correct answers.

[ElyDave]

Everybody on GBBO last night referring to pastéis de nata as if it were singular.

Mind you, I'm the twat who asks for a panino at the sarnie shop...

Seems all right to me, but then I ask for multiples of espressi or cappuccini

[Cudzoziemiec]

If you want a panino, you need the music shop.

[Bledlow]

People writing tonne when they mean ton, as in it cost a tonne of money. It's a wonder they don't write it cost a tonne (0.984 Imperial long tons) of money.

One of my colleagues does this all the time. If I'm editing his copy, I usually change it to 'loads' or something else to avoid the issue.

I think it's a form of hypercorrection, whereby all units are pedantically expressed in metric even if used figuratively.

See also: hide your light under 36.387 litres, go the whole 8.23 metres, give them 2.54cm and they'll take 1,6km...

I recall wandering around Sri Lanka in the 1980s & noticing that railway stations had the altitude on the main name sign.

In metres, in multiples of 3.05. 

At least it wasn't in multiples of 3.048.

We have height restriction barriers at work which are labelled as "Maximum height 5.334 m".

Doh!   

[Cudzoziemiec]

The habit of ending every sentence with an upward intonation as if it were a question is generally reckoned to have come from Australia. Neighbours seems to be suspected as the vector. It could be older and not Australian though.

On Friday my whole family went for a ride in my brother's new car. My brother bought this new Pontiac last week, and he wanted to take us all for a ride –  you know, to try it out and everything? ... And then, let's see, on Saturday I stayed home all day and helped my mother make my sister's wedding dress. My sister's engaged to be married, you see, and my mother's making this wedding dress for her?

We saw Doctor Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It was real good too. It's all about this guy who mixes up this chemical, like, that he drinks?
 And whenever he drinks this chemical, he changes into this real monster, like? You see him drink this chemical, and then you see his hands start to get all scales all over them, like a reptile and everything, and then you see his face start to change into this real horrible-looking face – with fangs and all? Sticking out of his mouth?

On Sunday, Bill Stringer came over to my house, and my dad helped rig up this old tire on this long rope? From a tree? There's this steep hill down behind my house, you see – this ravine, like? – and we hung this tire so that what you do is, you take the tire and run a little ways and then lift your feet, and you go swinging way, way out over the ravine and back.

Fourth grade children telling stories in class, NY State, mid-1950s.

Of course it still could have reached Britain from Australian soaps but the origin seems to be before that.

[Jaded]

Every year thousands of elderly people die from falling in the EU alone

Well, they should move. Or get with someone.