Last Wednesday evening, whilst in the Indian Ocean, Witham's finest Indian restaurant, Oaky announced that he and Huggy would meet at my house at 0845hrs on Saturday for brandy but no food (he was very clear on this point). After which we would ride to the station, pick up αdαmsκι, pop into Wetherspoon's for a quick pint and meet the rest of the crowd at D's Diner.
As the clock struck 0845hrs on Saturday some very fine cognac was warming nicely:
Pretty much on time Huggy appeared, dressed as a reindeer, I poured him a coffee and we waited for Oaky ... the cognac started to cool down ... we waited some more ... we got bored and began talking about pensions. Eventually, at approximately 0915hrs I phoned Oaky to find he was still at home. He had completely forgotten about his carefully considered plan
Huggy and I downed the now cold cognac and cycled to the station for the obligatory chat with a nutter. I took some photos after he had shuffled off:
Like the shopkeeper in Mr Benn αdαmsκι appeared having caught an earlier train. Oaky had yet to appear so we decided to intercept him on route. For reasons best known to himself αdαmsκι had failed to decorate himself or his bike so was frog marched into the 99p Store to rectify matters. We then carried on to 'spoons where festive pints were purchased. Again Oaky was phoned, he was at the station, but made it to the pub shorty after.
Huggy cut a fine dash in The Musky Reindeer Pelt of Destiny and looked super cool:
Pints drunk it was off to D's; along the way many cars tooted their appreciation of our decorations. There was quite a crowd at the diner:
Fast broken it was on the road, destination The Mighty North Hill. Some of us carried camping gear so were a little slower. The campers were the only riders who had GPS devices so knew our exact route. The weight weenies dashed up TMNH and carried on to Danbury. The campers followed our prescribed route turning left at the top of TMNH as our next stop was The Hurdlemakers. Shortly before we got there our phones started receiving calls and texts. The weight weenies were lost and couldn't find an open pub. Ha!, tough titties! The Hurdlemakers was open and in we piled:
The sharper eyed amongst you will note that Geoffrey was a sensible chap and stuck with the people that knew where we were going.
We found the rest of the ride in The Three Compasses, West Hanningfield:
Amazingly I managed to get 15 or so semi pissed blokes out of the pub and back on the road as we had to be at Tiger's Island for 1400hrs. We got there to find our tables reserved and waiting:
NB: this plaque was later presented to me as a souvenir by one of our number who was until very recently a serving police officer
We had a super meal, drank lots of beer, some gin and tonic and some merlot:
The waitresses Lucy, Issy and the lovely Jody coped admirably with the banter. Oaky showed off his indoor Christmas hat:
... and grew ear hair in front of our very eyes:
Flatbar Steve turned up as did christophe. Jeffrey could not manage his lunch so it was wrapped up. I think the plan was to leave it on his doorstep later:
Darkness had fallen by the time we set off again. We stopped off at the Three Elms and then made it to the Compasses where tents were erected, Huffers and assorted other grub was eaten and of course beer drunk.
I was presented with the MEMWNS Annual Trophy (I'm not worthy but thanks anyhow):
Then it was off to bed, but not before some Horlicks:
I slept well but awoke early thanks to birds and the jets from Stansted. In went earplugs and the next thing I knew it was 0845hrs again. No cognac this time but breakfast and a pub garden full of wonky tents:
And that was it! A splendid event, thanks to everyone for their company
It was decided that next year Oaky is organising the Christmas Do and christophe is wearing The Musky Reindeer Pelt of Destiny.