The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.

[Torslanda]

You need a home made smoker.

And garlic. LOTS of garlic . . .

[Feanor]

Hotel rooms anywhere near Edinburgh are hard to get hold of and furiously expensive in the month of August.

[CAMRAMan]

Self: When walking on a BFO hill in the Lake District, a) ensure you have the correct OS map downloaded onto the phone (I had OL5, not 7), b) when you discover a) ensure you have followed your steps on the paper OS map you had with you (I hadn't) and c) remember that you have the full Lake District OS maps on View Ranger (I forgot). Luckily we found the way back, but it was touch and go before the weather closed in.

[Guy]

The girl ahead of me in the shop queueueue this morning. Tried to pay by card but the till wasn't having any. Shop assistant sez "sorry, our internet connection has gone down. We can only take cash". Girl fumbles in bag for a few minutes, looking for enough cash, which she hasn't got. Without another word she wanders over to the link cash machine in the corner. The cash machine which, y'know, talks to the bank over, like, the internet, innit.  After a few more of minutes she says "it's not working!" and wanders out the door. The shop assistant pushed the girl's not-purchase to one side, cleared the till, and served a cash customer (me) in just a few seconds.

I was only ten minutes later than usual getting to work

Young woman with legs so skinny that both of them put together would make one of Chris Froome's arms: You are a feckin' div!

[mrcharly-YHT]

Actually, that's a bit unfair to the girl - there is no guarantee that the cash machine is using the same internet connection as the shop at all - and some even use dial-up, which would work even when the shop tills go down.

[David Martin]

Actually, that's a bit unfair to the girl - there is no guarantee that the cash machine is using the same internet connection as the shop at all - and some even use dial-up, which would work even when the shop tills go down.

Exactly, and it is always worth looking just in case.

[Morrisette]

Nine more years of Abellio. I'm not sure I can do this. Sigh.

*Googles electric bikes*

[rafletcher]

Still with phones, Argos claim to work from 8 till 12 Saturdays, but they're not answering the phone.

Similarly with the local Specsavers. A call at 8:45 on a Tuesday elicits the anwerphone message stating that they are presently closed, but are open from 8:30 on Tuesdays. of course at 9:01 I get through....

[Cudzoziemiec]

They did answer the phone a bit later though. And today they phoned me. My forks are ready!

[T42]

^^^Forkin' A.


Meanwhile, my wretched teacup is empty again.

[T42]

You need a home made smoker.

Visions of flitch of bacon bearing nicotine patches.

[meddyg]

Y'know how all the groovy radio stations 'Heart / Nation /Smooth/Radio 2' (not so groovy, just retired radio 1 jocks)
play jingle type percussion music while they read the news /weather ?
Could you get them to stop it, please ?
(this is the right place to ask isn't it?)

I did mention is to Terry Wogan and his  right hand man Pauli Walters
-but now they have gone to a better place, where they cannot exert the influence required.
Or perhaps they can....

Anyway, make it stop please

[Mr Larrington]

Either my feet have gone up two sizes in the last three weeks or my shoes have shrunk by the equivalent amount .

Ow, ow, fuckity-ow

Note to self: you shoes will fit a lot better if you remember to remove the rolled-up socks from inside them first

[hellymedic]

Either my feet have gone up two sizes in the last three weeks or my shoes have shrunk by the equivalent amount .

Ow, ow, fuckity-ow

Note to self: you shoes will fit a lot better if you remember to remove the rolled-up socks from inside them first

div thread is down there...

[T42]

Oh. Shit.

The missus being a lover of books and her birthday being next Wednesday, I went into her Amazon.fr book wish list last week and ordered everything on it.  Just now, dozing around on Amazon.co.uk I discovered another books wish list with a whole different set on it.  The .fr list was all Simone de Beauvoir, the .co.uk is all Wittgenstein GmbH & C° K.G.  Now I come to think of it, the S.d.B. kick was last year, but she wrote so many bloody books I can't keep track of everything.

No way the .co.uk. lot is going to reach France on time.

Oh. Shit.

[hellymedic]

Dear Neighbours,
The weather here in London is pleasant and we have our windows and doors open.
What makes you think we share your taste in muzak?
Please don't impose it on us; your amplified sound travels a long way!

[meddyg]

Whose bright idea was it to have Noel Fielding as curator at The Museum of Curiosity?

Is he a famous person, then ?
Likewise it brought me up sharp - he's not a Stephen Fry or a Will Self is he ?

Sarah Millican was brighter and more amusing

[ElyDave]

having successfully got to LHR T5 by train in 2 hours this morning I thought I was doing well today.  Good useful day trip to Aberdeen.

Flight 30 mins late on the way home, train stops for 30 minutes part way due to an alarm and then terminates at Cambridge instead of Ely.

Instead of being home for 11 after a 5am start, I've just got in.

[mike]

Parents of YACF, how early is too early to let your small child shout and scream while playing in the back garden?  Imagine if you lived in a terraced house surrounded by people sleeping. 

I feel 5.30 is a bit early.

[Andrij]

IANAP, but...

Any earlier than 07:00 is definitely WRONG.  IIRC, I don't think we were ever out much earlier than 8.

[ElyDave]

I think I left my decent earphones on Saturdays plane. Got distracted by the other half as I was getting up.

Fuckity arse bollocks

[hellymedic]

Parents of YACF, how early is too early to let your small child shout and scream while playing in the back garden?  Imagine if you lived in a terraced house surrounded by people sleeping. 

I feel 5.30 is a bit early.

I am not a parent.

I believe it is unlawful to sound the horn on a motor car between 23.30 and 07.00 so there is a general expectation of reduced night-time noise at these times.

It seems reasonable to keep kids quiet at these time too.

Your local Environmental Health department might be helpful...

[ian]

Parents of YACF, how early is too early to let your small child shout and scream while playing in the back garden?  Imagine if you lived in a terraced house surrounded by people sleeping. 

I feel 5.30 is a bit early.

If you live in London, then no worries, according to the Evening Standard it's only a matter of time before urban foxes eat them. I can't speculate on the appetite of foxes in the provinces, but when the local chicken has suffered the culinary ministrations of Colonel Sanders I can't entirely blame our foxes for making alternative mealtime arrangements.

[Kim]

Parents of YACF, how early is too early to let your small child shout and scream while playing in the back garden?  Imagine if you lived in a terraced house surrounded by people sleeping. 

I feel 5.30 is a bit early.

I live in a terraced house surrounded by, well, builders mostly.

The builders arrive early and start making noise on the dot of 8am.  They're more accurate than Old Joe.  I assume someone's had words.  This seems entirely reasonable.

I prefer it when the students are here, of course.  The sporty ones get up quietly at sparrowfart to go to sportsball training, and the rest are quiet until the afternoon.  I'd much rather have drunken zombies at 2am than anything at 8.

[ian]

One thing about living a steep valley that channels sound is that there is a constant beep-beep-beep (and other sundry noises) of reversing vehicles somewhere.

If I was, say, a morally unconstrained vampire I'd hunt down and bite the throat out of whoever invented this noxious audible phenomenon. As it is, I'll settle for beating them flat with a shovel while shouting 'stand clear, stand clear, a beating is happening'.