I've somehow lost the top 1" sealed form my wife's custom Mercian when reassembling it and google fails to find a direct replacement, are they very brand specific (it is a BBB)
there are very many types of bearing and yes some of them are brand-specific
or can I even just put good old fashioned loose ball bearings in there if I can't find a sealed ball bearing?
no, definitely not.
I would suggest that you have another look for the bearing (did it fall down somewhere? They tend to roll away....)
You can have a very careful look at the lower bearing and there may be some markings on it that will help you to search for a suitable replacement (in 1" headsets the upper and lower bearings are usually identical ). Failing that some careful measurements of the bearing (ID, OD, thickness, chamfer angle) should allow you to identify a suitable replacement.
If all else fails, you can always fit a new headset.
cheers