The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread

[perpetual dan]

*And yes, I did replace the pads on the hacked remote and used another.

I’m completely sure I’d have stuck at least one back in the wrong place. Quite possibly two.

I also remember ultrasonic remotes, though I don’t think it was at home.

[Mr Larrington]

When I was a Penniless Student Oaf we had a remote-controlled distascope which spontaneously changed channels if you unscrewed the wossname on a Presta valve and let the air out in the same room.

[Auntie Helen]

Also, I recall a possibly apocryphal story of a budgie learning the ultrasonic tones and changing the channel at random.  Not that I blame it, you take your entertainment where you can get it when you're a budgie.

Klaus my partner had two parrots when he was young and they did learn to change his sonic remote controlled television.

They had to be moved to another room.

[ElyDave]

The first time he came across our IR remote control I distinctly remember my grandad pushing buttons and muttering "don't think much of this calculator" as various things happened on the TV.

It's very possible he was hamming it up for the gallery aka an 8 yo ED 

[Ashaman42]

I'm constitutionally incapable of using a tape measure without pretending it's either a really rubbish yoyo or a faulty walky talky.

[Mrs Pingu]

I have never heard of these sonic remotes.

[ian]

You've probably never tried to resuscitate a budgie either.

[Mrs Pingu]

Correct

[ian]

If I'm ever in Six degrees North again, I promise to demonstrate.

[Pingu]

That's a date 

[PaulF]

That's a date 

Now you just need to find a budgie....

[T42]

At patisserie stop today, I grabbed a freebie bonbon and tried to shove it into my mouth - through the mask.

[quixoticgeek]

At patisserie stop today, I grabbed a freebie bonbon and tried to shove it into my mouth - through the mask.

Wearing a mask has made me realise how much I use my mouth to hold stuff. Yesterday I tried to hold my headphone cable in my mouth, while wearing a mask.

It didn't work..

J

[barakta]

Wearing a mask has made me realise how much I use my mouth to hold stuff. Yesterday I tried to hold my headphone cable in my mouth, while wearing a mask.

Yes, me too, especially when I lose most of a hand to the sodding stick.

[quixoticgeek]

Yes, me too, especially when I lose most of a hand to the sodding stick.

When I was on crutches, the number of times I smashed them into another part of my body by forgetting they were on my arm when I let go to point, or grab something...

I'm realising how much I chew my nails, as well as just how disgusting all the hand sanitiser residue is... The stuff at the GP surgery, which had a consistency far far too like lube for comfort, has the worst taste so far.

J

[Jakob W]

The slimy hand sanitizer is horrible; having never seen it before the current unpleasantness, I wonder whether it's a) easier to produce than the regular stuff, and the nastiness is a trade-off against being able to produce hectolitres of it; or b) the nastiness is actively desired in an attempt to stop people using too much and/or nicking the dispensers...

[barakta]

I kick, trip over and hit myself with my stick ALL the time, so annoying, especially as I am using it in part as a visual spatial defining point and partly like a long blind cane or tactile feedback...

And yes, I've noticed the sliminess of the hand sanitiser at the local pool, doesn't dry quickly and leaves a residue on my stick handle and keeps my hands slimy even in the pool. I'm avoiding it now as the only thing I touch is my own swipe in card and stuff before getting into chlorinated water.

[ElyDave]

I can only imagine, managing with a stick for only 8 weeks really pi$$ed me off.  I generally avoid other people's hand sanitisers as well because some of the ingredients leave a residue that affects the reading on my blood glucose meter as well.

[T42]

Hey! Great excuse, that. Thanks, Dave! 

[Ham]

Hot off the press!!!

Before picking up a soldering iron by the bit, to see if it is cool enough to put it away, checking to see that it is unplugged is a GOOD idea.

Mebbe that should have been "Press off the hot"

[Kim]

Related: Never catch a dropped smouldering iron.  Or walk barefoot around one that's in use at floor level.

[Zipperhead]

Related: Never catch a dropped smouldering iron.

oooh, I've learnt that lesson as well. Probably the only thing that I've had to learn just the once.

[hellymedic]

Wearing a mask has made me realise how much I use my mouth to hold stuff. Yesterday I tried to hold my headphone cable in my mouth, while wearing a mask.

Yes, me too, especially when I lose most of a hand to the sodding stick.

As I said to LWaB: 'Free without one pair of crutches: one pair of hands'.

Nice thing about a wheelchair is that I'm seated and able to use hands without flailing around, grasping for a balance handhold.

[barakta]

As I said to LWaB: 'Free without one pair of crutches: one pair of hands'.

Nice thing about a wheelchair is that I'm seated and able to use hands without flailing around, grasping for a balance handhold.

Gosh, wheelchairs as empowering not 'binding' as in 'wheelchair-bound'. SHOCKER.

An abled will be along shortly to tell you how wrong you are, you POOR thing *snerk*.

[Kim]

I suspect that cyclists are better predisposed than most to grok the enablement aspect of a wheelchair, even if they do have some frankly peculiar tyres...