Dispute resolution with gaming server

[Peter]

I don't know if anyone knows what I'm talking about and I'm not sure I do! 

A close, younger relative, who is autistic, has been barred from a gaming site for an outburst of anger (not discriminatory).  She regrets it and has pleaded to be allowed back on, with no success.  The site will no longer communicate with her.  The trouble is that being on this site is (at the moment) part of her gestalt and if she can't get back on, even if just to leave it on her own terms, she is "stuck" with everything else in her life, will almost certainly self-harm and quite possibly worse.  I know it is hard to understand but she has very severe, so far untreatable, mental problems which include heavy-duty OCD.

I have done a bit of research into gaming (I don't game) and it seems that the games are hosted by a platform or server but are otherwise independent.  However, the server seems to have a terms of use document, which includes a disputes section.  I thought this might allow me to intervene via the server/platform to get them to emphasise to the "game" just how serious a situation this is.  Does anyone know if this is worth a shot?  At the moment several other gamers have tried to intervene on her behalf but the person who runs the game (and has the power) seems to assume everyone is just an alias for the poor sufferer and has blocked everything.

I know it all seems unbelievable and I wish it was.  But if anyone has any idea or experience I'd really appreciate it, either here, or via PM.

Thank you, in hope rather than anticipation.

Peter

[rusky]

I would suggest looking on Reddit to see if there's a community there that can help

[mrcharly-YHT]

I've played online games quite a bit and several of my family are 'gamers'.

Moderation of players is an understaffed job, and moderators are often exposed to considerable harassment.

So it can be very difficult to get hold of them for direct communication.

What is the game?  Is it a site for discussing the game, or the actual game play itself she is banned from?

If all of her social interaction is via a game site (a game version of YACF), then you need to get hold of the webmaster.

[Peter]

Thank you both very much!  I'll look into your suggestions.

Charly, She's actually been chucked off two sites, apparently "Belgrade By Night" and "Building 17".  The most recent of these is:-

Belgrade by Night: A V20 VtM: The Masquerade Discord Role Play Server

i've tracked this down and the person running it is the person who has banned her and will no longer communicate.  I'm not sure if she/he(+) is the webmaster, therefore - I don't know how it works.

rusky I've come across some links to a reddit community, so I'll try there, too.

Thanks again, both.

Peter

[Peter]

@ Canardly,

Yes, I know and appreciate what you're saying.  It's all understandable.  The player in question has mental "flares" which can lead to an extreme verbal reaction, though this doesn't involve foul or any form of discriminatory language.  And it's not really aimed at an individual, as far as I know. more of a Primal Scream (though without the lousy Scottish music).  I understand why such actions are taken but this has had extreme consequences and we need to try and unravel it if only temporarily.

But thanks for your comment.

Peter
 

[Kim]

Ah right, so it's a Discord (software, like SMF) server devoted to Vampire The Masquerade (originally a tabletop role-playing game, but these things are eminently suited to being played online using forum software), like YACF is an SMF forum devoted to cycling.  I'd expect it to have the Discord equivalent of 'boards', with some devoted to actually playing the game, and others for discussion about playing the game, and possibly some for completely off-topic stuff like we have 'The Pub'.

In which case, there'll be a Dez who's probably mostly interested in Discord and databases and DNS and such and probably doesn't want to get involved in community drama, and a team of long-suffering mods who'll be responsible for it not turning into a homophobia club for 12 year olds.

Gamers tend to be technically competent and not averse to using dirty tricks, so moderation is likely to be no-nonsense.  They're unlikely to give much weight to an appeal by a third-party with no credentials (by which I mean, social standing in their community or being known personally by the mods), as you're a sock puppet until proven otherwise, and they're not going to waste their time on the proof.

Ultimately, their site, their rules.  That's how these things work.   

[Mr Larrington]

Tangentially, I still haven’t quite grasped what Discord is for.  My limited exposure to it suggests it’s a bit like a forum only shit.

[Kim]

Tangentially, I still haven’t quite grasped what Discord is for.  My limited exposure to it suggests it’s a bit like a forum only shit.

It's for crowd-sourcing the design of the Marble Machine X.

[Canardly]

I deleted my original post. There is another Discord address playing the game albeit set in another location, if this helps.

https://discord.gg/fc4magbhBD

[Peter]

Thank you, Kim.  As you say,  or worse, far worse.  How to prove I'm not a sock-puppet to someone who won't even respond.  I've thought of joining the site but ~I expect I'll be rejected purely on the strength of my similar e-mail address.  I suppose I could set up a different e-mail account but I had hoped I could find a way to talk to someone with "power" over the actual game site.  I can understand why these things operate the way they do.  Sadly, we are dealing with an incredibly difficult set of medical circumstances that one couldn't imagine encountering when setting up roolz - so no need for any form of mediation.

Thanks again.

Peter

[Peter]

I deleted my original post. There is another Discord address playing the game, if this helps.

https://discord.gg/fc4magbhBD

Thanks Canardly - I would have had no chance of knowing that, or even what it means - but I'll try and pass it on!

[Kim]

Thank you, Kim.  As you say,  or worse, far worse.  How to prove I'm not a sock-puppet to someone who won't even respond.  I've thought of joining the site but ~I expect I'll be rejected purely on the strength of my similar e-mail address.  I suppose I could set up a different e-mail account but I had hoped I could find a way to talk to someone with "power" over the actual game site.  I can understand why these things operate the way they do.  Sadly, we are dealing with an incredibly difficult set of medical circumstances that one couldn't imagine encountering when setting up roolz - so no need for any form of mediation.

Sadly, an autistic person having a meltdown is exactly the sort of thing I'd imagine encountering when setting up teh roolz (it's gaming, half of them are going to be neurodiverse or otherwise lacking in social skills, if not necessarily so vulnerable) and I wouldn't wouldn't give it any special weight.  Even if they threatened drama or got a note from their mum.

I suppose there's the bribery option.  But that would require them to communicate.

[Kim]

Ah right, so it's a Discord (software, like SMF) server devoted to Vampire The Masquerade (originally a tabletop role-playing game, but these things are eminently suited to being played online using forum software), like YACF is an SMF forum devoted to cycling.  I'd expect it to have the Discord equivalent of 'boards', with some devoted to actually playing the game, and others for discussion about playing the game, and possibly some for completely off-topic stuff like we have 'The Pub'.

I've just remembered this is wrong.  Discord 'servers' aren't servers, they're just communities on a social network, like Facebook Groups or something.  (The 'server' terminology is a poor analogy to the user experience of IRC)

So there isn't a server with a Dez maintaining the software, there's a bunch of people who set up a community using the one and only Discord social network.

[Peter]

Yes, it's the communication that is the problem.  We strongly suspect that the person now running the game is spectrate, too.  And, of course, there's little chance of a spectrate person allowing for similar conditions when writing the roolz!  Ah, well.

just seen your latest post about it being a community - so are we talking about a group that has a moderator, in this case maybe just the one, and it's their say so on everything?

PS  Barakta OK? - and you?

[Kim]

just seen your latest post about it being a community - so are we talking about a group that has a moderator, in this case maybe just the one, and it's their say so on everything?

I expect so, yes.  I'm sure Discord might intervene if someone were doing something that was likely to result in legal liability for them, but that's going to be actual law-breaking, defamation or copyright infringement type stuff.  Like Facebook, they're not going to have the resources to intervene in community squabbling, and if they did it would be through use of the delete button.

PS  Barakta OK? - and you?

Getting there.  Over last week's digestive woe, at least, and her walking is good enough for hobbling round the kitchen.

[Peter]

OK, Kim, I get that.

Good about Barakta, though!