Author Topic: National Limerick Day  (Read 1132 times)

Wowbagger

  • Sylph
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
National Limerick Day
« on: 12 May, 2022, 09:39:27 pm »
Apparently it is.

Anyone got any good ones?
I want to surf the zeitgeist to where it’s all happening

meddyg

  • 'You'll have had your tea?'
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #1 on: 12 May, 2022, 09:45:23 pm »
Garrison Keillor can usually be relied upon:

"There was a young man of Anoka
Who tried to write a great limerick.
He tried and he tried
And some were not bad,
But something seemed to be missing..."

but not today, apparently !

meddyg

  • 'You'll have had your tea?'
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #2 on: 12 May, 2022, 09:49:43 pm »
There was a young lady … tut, tut!
So you think that you're in for some smut?
    Some five-line crescendo
    Of lewd innuendo?
Well, you're wrong. This is anything but.

—Stanley J. Sharpless

Feanor

  • It's mostly downhill from here.
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #3 on: 12 May, 2022, 09:59:23 pm »
What a wonderful bird is the pelican
It's beak can hold more than it's belly can
   It can keep in it's beak
   What it needs for a week
But I don't know how the 'ell 'e can

Arellcat

  • Velonautte
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #4 on: 12 May, 2022, 10:12:58 pm »
A pair and a triple combined
as a rhyme so neatly designed!
  With rigourous form
  the limerick's norm:
a verse more concise you won't find.
Quote from: Morningsider
I like that you think any of your conveyances might qualify as "a disguise".

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #5 on: 12 May, 2022, 10:45:18 pm »
A vice most obscure and unsavoury
Kept a certain young cleric in slavery
With episcopal howls
He deflowered virgin owls
Which he bred in his underground aviary
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Wowbagger

  • Sylph
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #6 on: 12 May, 2022, 10:57:27 pm »
Dez and I were discussing limericks on the family Whatsapp group. After a while his youngest sister sent this from Melbourne:

"A father and son from Southend
Discovered a lyrical trend:
Corresponding in rhyme
Most of the time,
They drove everyone else round the bend"
I want to surf the zeitgeist to where it’s all happening

ElyDave

  • Royal and Ancient Polar Bear Society member 263583
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #7 on: 12 May, 2022, 11:16:20 pm »
The boy stood on the burning deck
His legs were all a-quiver
He gave a cough
His leg fell off
And floated down the river


Anyway, why can't other cities have their own days as well?
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #8 on: 12 May, 2022, 11:35:52 pm »
Every day is Cork day!  Hic!
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

robgul

  • Cycle:End-to-End webmaster
  • cyclist, Cytech accredited mechanic & woodworker
    • Cycle:End-to-End
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #9 on: 13 May, 2022, 07:52:39 am »
The boy stood on the burning deck
His legs were all a-quiver
He gave a cough
His leg fell off
And floated down the river


Anyway, why can't other cities have their own days as well?

I thought the boy on the burning deck was licking a threepenny Walls ?


IGMC

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #10 on: 13 May, 2022, 09:57:08 am »
When I were a lad he was eating cheese and crackers.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

citoyen

  • Occasionally rides a bike
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #11 on: 13 May, 2022, 09:58:57 am »
Brian Bilston posted some on the Twitters yesterday that made me laugh. Worth a click:

http://twitter.com/brian_bilston/status/1524665844281888768
"The future's all yours, you lousy bicycles."

T42

  • Patron saint of the dry joint
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #12 on: 13 May, 2022, 10:52:39 am »
There was a young vicar of Salisbury
Whose manners were halisbury-scalisbury
He ran around Hampshire
Without any pampshire
Till his bishop compelled him to walisbury.
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Zipperhead

  • The cyclist formerly known as Big Helga
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #13 on: 13 May, 2022, 02:18:42 pm »
When I were a lad he was eating cheese and crackers.

When I were a lad he was playing cricket
Won't somebody think of the hamsters!

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #14 on: 13 May, 2022, 03:02:14 pm »
A mathematician, named Klein,
Thought the Möbius strip was divine.
Said he 'If you glue
The edges of two,
You'll get a weird bottle, like mine!

Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #15 on: 13 May, 2022, 04:26:36 pm »
The PM so puts on a front
He's often so terribly blunt
Free wallpaper and food
Puts him in the mood
To be such a nasty old c*unt!


Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #16 on: 13 May, 2022, 09:11:23 pm »
There was a young lady from Cheam
Who invented the screwing machine
Concave or convex
To suit either sex
And a bucket to catch all the cream
Through the angel rain, through the dust and the gasoline, through the cruelty of strangers, to the neon dream

Wowbagger

  • Sylph
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #17 on: 13 May, 2022, 11:36:28 pm »
A mosquito was heard to complain
That a chemist had poisoned his brain.
The cause of his sorrow
Was paradichloro
Diphenyltrichloroethane.
I want to surf the zeitgeist to where it’s all happening

Wowbagger

  • Sylph
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #18 on: 13 May, 2022, 11:40:17 pm »
There was a young fellow named Menzies
Whose kissing drove girls into frenzies
Till a virgin one night
Crossed her legs in a fright
And fractured his bifocal lenses.
I want to surf the zeitgeist to where it’s all happening

Mrs Pingu

  • Who ate all the pies? Me
    • Twitter
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #19 on: 13 May, 2022, 11:42:51 pm »
On Neveski bridge the Russian stood
Chewing his beard for lack of food
Said he; 'it's darn tough this stuff to eat
But it's a damn sight better than Shredded Wheat'
Do not clench. It only makes it worse.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #20 on: 14 May, 2022, 12:02:11 am »
Objection, yeronner!  That ^^^^ ent a limerick.

It is, however, a true story :)
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Pingu

  • Put away those fiery biscuits!
  • Mrs Pingu's domestique
    • the Igloo
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #21 on: 14 May, 2022, 12:14:37 am »
There was a young fellow named Menzies
Whose kissing drove girls into frenzies
Till a virgin one night
Crossed her legs in a fright
And fractured his bifocal lenses.

That disnae work in Scots.

Wowbagger

  • Sylph
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #22 on: 14 May, 2022, 12:58:37 am »
There was a young fellow named Menzies
Whose kissing drove girls into frenzies
Till a virgin one night
Crossed her legs in a fright
And fractured his bifocal lenses.

That disnae work in Scots.

Which is OK because Limerick is in Ireland... ;)
I want to surf the zeitgeist to where it’s all happening

Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #23 on: 14 May, 2022, 07:15:39 am »
There was a young lady from Staines
Whose favourite diet was trains
When she couldn't eat those
Cos the stations were closed
She ate diggers and lorries and cranes
Through the angel rain, through the dust and the gasoline, through the cruelty of strangers, to the neon dream

JennyB

  • Old enough to know better
Re: National Limerick Day
« Reply #24 on: 14 May, 2022, 10:29:51 am »
There was a young fellow named Menzies
Whose kissing drove girls into frenzies
Till a virgin one night
Crossed her legs in a fright
And fractured his bifocal lenses.

That disnae work in Scots.


From the Brian Bilston Twitter thread above:


There wis a young lassie named Menzies,
That askit her aunt whit this thenzies.
Said her aunt wi a gasp,
"Ma dear, it's a wasp,
An you're haudin the end whaur the stenzies!"



Jennifer - Walker of hills