Overheard today

[Basil]

I had to ask, and actually it does make sense.  Meaty pizzas have very little veggie stuff on them, so order the veggie pizza and add your own meaty stuff.
*filed away in brain for future consideration*

[jsabine]

I've ordered a vegan burger with added bacon before - that particular one made a fine combination.

[The Family Cyclist]

Cycling home from allotment there's a guy on path in front of me (I'm on road), looked like he had a bum bag round his torso as the cool kids do these days. As I passed he muttered something about it being hard for the lonely. I glances round and he had a small dog in a carrier across his chest

[Clare]

These are my placenta lunchboxes.

[Cudzoziemiec]

These are my placenta lunchboxes.

I'm told the Germans fry it with onions.

[Clare]

Sounds foul.

The speaker was an O&G researcher and the lunchboxes are actually for samples so it does make sense but it was a bit odd to hear while i was making my coffee.

[Cudzoziemiec]

I'd assumed it was, in the case you overheard, a malapropism for polenta!

[Paul]

These are my placenta lunchboxes.

How big are these lunchboxes? Are they quite womby?

[Nuncio]

Despite my retirement I am still being informed of my old malapropistic colleague's choicest utterances.

Apparently he has suggested that one of the gluten of newbies could do a piece of work. And he'd reported arriving at work wide tailed and bushy eyed one morning.

[Clare]

These are my placenta lunchboxes.

How big are these lunchboxes? Are they quite womby?

 

[Cudzoziemiec]

One end of a phone conversation. The speaker was walking down the street a short distance behind me, speaking loudly in Polish, either confident no one understood or not caring if they did. The other end of the conversation was presumably in Poland. This part was prompted by the sight of two young persons, probably students, both dressed as a girl, ie she was wearing some sort of jumpsuit or similar and he was in a long, denim, wraparound skirt.

"Fucking hell, the young generation here are completely mixing up male and female. I see it all the time. The men look like women and the women are like men. It fucking does my head in.

But on the other hand, you know, it's progress. The sexes don't mean the same anymore, and I respect that. It's progress."

[Kim]

Overheard at a pelican crossing:

"I counted 92 piles of dog poo on the way from..."

Sadly the location was lost to engine noise as the lights turned green, but since I was leaving the Independent Republic of Stirchley, I'm going to assume Dogpool Lane.

[Basil]

 

[woollypigs]

Walking past two small kids coming out of a house followed by a man, with the very early slow dripping before a summers light shower.

Child #1: oh it's raining
Man: well kids, I think you are going to get wet
Child #2: NEVER! she shouted as she ran off in a random direction

I like her

[Basil]

"I'm not calling the kettle a black pot..."

[Basil]

"I'm mostly vegan."

[Clare]

"That was where I was burned on the arm with a cigarette by a lesbian lady."

[rogerzilla]

"...and they found her dead on the bus.  It's no good having money if you're not around to enjoy it."