Tales from the Lock-Down

[Jaded]

Passed a main roadside pub this evening with tables outside fairly well occupied by customers. All closely seated and none wearing masks. Has the message been lost in the telling somewhere?

On
Mondays to Wednesdays it is safe.

[rob]

My lot start back in the office on a rota system from 1st Sep.  My last day with them is 31st Aug.

The new place doesn’t have enough room for everyone spaced out so can do a max of 40% occupancy.  I’ll probably go into town 2 days a week and do the rest from home.

I have a courier picking up my pc on Tuesday and another courier delivering the new one the same day.

[Mr Larrington]

Do people actually still drink that filthy muck now that even USAnians have learned how to brew proper BEER?

[PaulF]

My lot start back in the office on a rota system from 1st Sep.  My last day with them is 31st Aug.

The new place doesn’t have enough room for everyone spaced out so can do a max of 40% occupancy.  I’ll probably go into town 2 days a week and do the rest from home.

I have a courier picking up my pc on Tuesday and another courier delivering the new one the same day.

I can’t see any possible way that you’ll be left without a computer

[L CC]

One of my team is waiting for results.

[ian]

Do people actually still drink that filthy muck now that even USAnians have learned how to brew proper BEER?

It's still inconceivably popular with a slice of lime jammed in the neck. Like Stella, which tastes – I'd imagine, I've never tasted Toilet Duck – like a toilet cleaning product.

[citoyen]

Like Stella, which tastes – I'd imagine, I've never tasted Toilet Duck – like a toilet cleaning product.

Isn't the main appeal of industrial lagerpops that they don't taste much of anything at all?

People get easily confused by things that interfere with their tastebuds - distracts them from focusing their attention 100% on the football.

[Rod Marton]

Like Stella, which tastes – I'd imagine, I've never tasted Toilet Duck – like a toilet cleaning product.

Isn't the main appeal of industrial lagerpops that they don't taste much of anything at all?

People get easily confused by things that interfere with their tastebuds - distracts them from focusing their attention 100% on the football.

Some years ago I was given a tour of a laboratory and was rather impressed by the number of bottles of beer lying around. OK, it was Budweiser, but even so...

Turned out they doing a project to detect a chemical which caused taint in beer. Though it seemed it was only a problem for American beer, because American beer doesn't taste of anything.

[ian]

I like a decent lager, but it has to taste of something. Corona, as far as I recall, is tasteless (as are domestic US beers). Stella was outright nasty, I presume they brew it in the UK from concentrated gunk (basically add water and yeast). I don't remember Stella in Belgium tasting that bad. Possibly it's location, drinking piss-water local brews sitting with your legs dangling off the back of a catamaran in the Caribbean doesn't really translate to sitting by a radiator on a damp December evening in Surrey.

[Tim Hall]

Many years ago, in a newsgroup far far away, this was posted:

one of our "cultural outings" was to elgood's in wisbech. the head
brewer _there_ took us around and at one point showed us a vat which
their "lager" was brewing. i said "that's not a lager, it's a
top-fermenting yeast". he said "_you_ know it's not a lager, and _i_
know it's not a lager, but it has the stainless steel and polythene
flavour the punters seem to like".

It has remained lodged in my memory banks for no good reason but it seems appropriate.

[citoyen]

The lack of flavour in US beers is largely down to using a high proportion of rice and corn syrup, rather than all malt. Although they market it as 'clean' and 'crisp', like this is a good thing, rather than calling it 'flavourless'.

I don't find Stella all that bad - mainly because the high alcohol level gives it a bit of bite, at least. Although I can't actually remember the last time I drank Stella (which is, ironically, a known side-effect of drinking Stella).

Anyway, back on the topic of lockdown, one of the benefits of WFH is that I occasionally get to visit the local brewery tap during its limited opening hours. I've been enjoying their seasonal summer brew, which most definitely has plenty of flavour - it's a superbly balanced strong-ish bitter with oodles of malt and hops. And drinking it just a few metres from where it was brewed, it's fresh as can be. I'm going to miss my afternoon rides over there when I'm back in the office.

[Tim Hall]

Taking of drinking beerr a few metres from where it was brewed, I went to the Milk Churn cafe while cyclimg at the weekend, which is just off the Downs Link.  On the same site is the Firebird Brewery, so I bought a bottle of Heritage to drink with my sausage roll.

The blurb says

A Sussex Classic, developed from an old recipe of Bill's Great, Great grandad. Full malt flavour, robust bitterness, and a subtle dried fruits aftertaste.

Tasty enough but I'm sure it would have tasted even better if it hadn't come out of the fridge.  I may write to them, if ICBA, to suggest this.

[T42]

I remember going to SF with a German colleague back in the 80s and being delighted to see Spaten and Löwenbräu signs in the first bar we went to. The delight lasted right up to the first mouthful.  Can't quite remember Georg's first comment, it was something along the lines of "was für ein Scheiß..?"  It was still better than the local gnatswater, though.

[ian]

I just find British Stella to taste like I'd expect licking the tank to taste, weird and metallic. Sitting in a bar in Belgium with a small glass of it, it's fine. I quite like Jupiler, probably because it only seems to appear as an import rather than the dreaded 'brewed in the UK.' It's best not to drink too much, otherwise you start to fancy seeing yourself in a nice pair of red trousers.

US beers are adjuncts, basically dumping grounds for the ubiquitous corn syrup that plagues everything in the US (because corn is cheap and barley is not). I have no idea why anyone would willingly drink American Budweiser or, even worse, Bud Lite (an implausible concept, surely).

I'm missing the many brewery taprooms of London, though we're keeping the delivery companies happy, not to mention the local micropub's takeaway, also not to mention Hop Stuff in Reigate which we always seem to be driving by at 8pm on Saturday.

[robgul]

Corona "beer" is taking a bit of a pasting - two YouTube videos take the biscuit - especially the second one with the American woman - which is, I understand, not a spoof . . . it was when the Trump convention was planning for Jacksonville.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phy4dwelKig

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WN3qQDtv9dg   (an American classic)

[robgul]

Rob, specially for you - That Jacksonville Lady Wants You to Know She's "Not a Moron".

Only in America!    I saw the original clip on, I think, something that branched off a CNN news item.

... sort of in the same arena  . . . . . .  I used to run the UK/Europe end of a US company (in the digital marketing sector) - at a meeting I was at in N California, about 2004/5,  there was some discussion about money and the effect of exchange rates on the business and my customers ... one of the newly appointed sales team from somewhere in the mid-West did not know/believe that there were other currencies beyond the US$ - not a joke, she really was that thick (unsurprisingly she only lasted about 6 weeks)

[hatler]

Just as well the conversation didn't turn to VAT. That fries most Murikans' brains.

[Mr Larrington]

Just as well the conversation didn't turn to VAT. That fries most Murikans' brains.

Can't think why; most USAnian states have Sales Tax which isn’t included in the price displayed on the shelf.

[SoreTween]

Isn't the main appeal of industrial lagerpops that they don't taste much of anything at all?

People get easily confused by things that interfere with their tastebuds - distracts them from focusing their attention 100% on the football.

What's the matter lager boy, afraid you might taste something?
From memory as on teeny screen phone, apologies if quote not 100%

[ian]

Just as well the conversation didn't turn to VAT. That fries most Murikans' brains.

Can't think why; most USAnian states have Sales Tax which isn’t included in the price displayed on the shelf.

I have had the discussion – mostly because, like most people, I'm bemused why the fuck they add on the sales tax at the end (and vary it by street) so you never know how much something will cost – a proportion of Americans think it's a secret socialist tax. How do you know how much if it's embedded in the price? they'll argue. Because it's a simple percentage, say I, and I can do elementary maths because I come from a country with schools.

Someone once argued with the fact that we have to pay it then. I don't think it's negotiatable in the US. Ah, but we can drive to a different state, he opined. Yeah, well, I could fly to a different country, but it's a bit much to save a few pence on a can of fizzy pop.

[cygnet]

20% is dead easy, 17.5% took a little more thought but still fairly straightforward.
The few times I've visited the US I've been amazed at how fast they can calculate Sales Tax + Tip from a bill. (To the cent when paying by card)
Which is far more complex than the above VAT rates

[ian]

Thing is, I don't want to calculate it. It's there, I can't negotiate it away, that's the price. Once you've added the state tax, the city tax, the liquor tax, the food tax, the waitress's bad haircut stipend and the tip, the general price of everything is how fucking much?

[cygnet]

Back on topic, the office I used to work in has been open since the 5th and I've been there two days this week.

Dead quiet, but they are only now doing stuff to facilitate working there, that they have had months to plan for. I've been able to take advantage of the fact that it's quiet to make it known to appropriate people that there's even more stuff they need to solve.

Not going in tomorrow, I got "a bit damp" cycling home [/Fairweather commuter] 😁.

[Feanor]

Because it's a simple percentage, say I, and I can do elementary maths because I come from a country with schools.

Mrs F remains bamboozled at how to back out tax percentages.

So I start with £100, and add 10% tax. That gives me £110.
To back it out, I just subtract 10%, right?
But when I do that I get the Wrong Answer!

Yes, 10% of £110 is a different amount to 10% of £100.

We've been through the maths many, many times. But it seems to be Deep Magic.

[Mrs Pingu]

Tax % ÷ (100% + tax%) x grand total, innit?
In your case 10 ÷ 110 x £110 = £10.

I have enough trouble trying to explain how to calculate 10% quickly to science graduates at work. Their minds seem blown by the concept of doing n x 0.1 rather than n x (10/100). Actually sorry, they probably really do n/100 x 10.
If I tried explaining the calculation above I don't think I'd get very far. Same as the concept of 'if this value equals 70%, what would 100% be? Divide by 0.7'

And as Pingu will testify from long hours helping me slave over my day release degree, I am shit at maths but these people seem to think I am some sort of magician.