The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.

[Mrs Pingu]

A flame thrower on a long pole?

[Vince]

You need an EldestCub.  Wivva stick.

The first thing I learned as Akela is that Cubs and sticks should be separated at the earliest convenience.

[Dibdib]

My approach to gardening is to channel my inner Pyro from TF2:

[rafletcher]

Websites with "web contact" forms. Why bother if you never ever bloody respond?

[Kim]

Eye update: With liberal application of Piriton the swelling is now down to the point where it's pretty much fully functional for seeing out of.  The tear duct still isn't working properly, and it's uncomfortable to wear my glasses, so I still don't get to ride my bike, even if I wasn't permanently about to doze off...

That's the problem with triffids.  Once you lose the advantage of vision, you're fucked.

[Mr Larrington]

Ah!  Meester Sainsbury!  I see what you have done here.  You have increased the price of a 150g refill of $BROWN_DRINK from £3.50 to £4.50.  At the same time, you have decreased the price of a 190g jar of the very same $BROWN_DRINK from whatever it was on Tuesday to £4.00.

Along with "smoked mackerel pate", the phrase or saying "joined-up thinking" is notably absent from your lexicon.

Of course in an ideal world the manufacturers of $BROWN_DRINK would supply both jars and refills in the same fucking size

[barakta]

Sainsbury's substituted lactofree milk with UHT lactofree. NOT at all the same thing. I didn't make the order and the person who did didn't challenge the other crap substitutions of food I don't much like cos she was too stressed. Fortunately someone was doing supermarket inna car so they got me proper milk but I resent paying for UHT version I don't like anD  having to decide if I bin it or hoik it home.

What's the point in online delivery if they don't deliver what I asked for? They already didn't STOCK a bunch of stuff that the website had until a locale went into it.

[Tim Hall]

Wheel building adventures part n.

Lunch time take old spoke into LBS. I'd like 32 like that, but stainless double butted.  Bloke measures spoke and counts out 32. I pay.

Get home this evening and start lacing wheel. By the time I get to the leading spokes, something is not right and things don't fit. Pull, twist, swear and still the spokes don't reach. Check lacing, nope not that.

Measure new spoke against old one. 2mm shorter. Bum.

[bumper]

Some muppet told me it was a bank holiday this Monday. I've been plodding around all week thinking I'd got an extra day on the bike. I've just been chatting to someone I know through work and he got excited about it too. After asking his wife, she informed us it was Scotland only.

When I see the nobber who told me, I'm going to kick him in the nuts. No doubt I won't see the cock until Tuesday

To add an extra insult, my wife knew it wasn't but never bothered to tell me.

[hellymedic]

The calendar on my computer also says it's a Bank Holiday.
It is not.

[bumper]

Can we just pretend so I can go ride instead.

I'm still kicking him in the nuts or up the arse Father Ted Style.

[Tim Hall]

The calendar on my computer also says it's a Bank Holiday.
It is not.

Seeing as said bank holiday is Scotland only, I deduce your computer is a Mac


<rimshot>

[Mr Larrington]

Bad man.

Railway likely to be Căile Ferate Române.

[hellymedic]

The calendar on my computer also says it's a Bank Holiday.
It is not.

Seeing as said bank holiday is Scotland only, I deduce your computer is a Mac


<rimshot>

Yes, it is a Mac, with Battle of the Boyne stretching indelibly over some July weekend. I really wish I could delete these entries!

[Guy]

Summer. There's a nice shiny blue sky out there and it's peeing down

[Ruth]

Why is it that most kitchen timers go up to 60 or 99 minutes?  That's just stupid 

I like my cabbage done for at least three hours. 

[Kim]

Why is it that most kitchen timers go up to 60 or 99 minutes?  That's just stupid 

Because they're designed by the same people who do the timers on ovens.

[Ruth]

But the oven in my old place had a marvellous timer that would time for hours if you wanted to.  It also turned the oven on and off when you told it to.

I worked out how to use this about two weeks before I moved out.  It was brilliant.

 

[David Martin]

I use a lab timer instead. Something like this: http://www.dx.com/p/1-7-lcd-thermometer-with-timer-for-kitchen-lab-1-x-aaa-127169?tc=GBP&gclid=CNSPgvDF-r8CFVMRtAod0wgAkg which does up to 4 days. So that should be enough for even the most well done Får i kål.

And you can clip it on to your clothes, or use the magnet ont he back to put it on the fridge, or what have you. Many are given away as freebies by companies as promotional items.

[Kim]

But the oven in my old place had a marvellous timer that would time for hours if you wanted to.  It also turned the oven on and off when you told it to.

I worked out how to use this about two weeks before I moved out.  It was brilliant.

 

That's pretty good, normally they turn the oven on and off at pseudorandom intervals, as a way to dissuade you from meddling.

I do of course have a computer terminal in the kitchen for this sort of thing, but that's because I belong to an older generation of nerd^[1].



_{[1] Someone actually told me this earlier.  I think it was a compliment.}

[Ruth]

That's great Dr Oi, but it appears to be calibrated in American Pounds instead of British Poinds, and is therefore substandard.

Where can I get a British timer from? 

 

[David Martin]

That's great Dr Oi, but it appears to be calibrated in American Pounds instead of British Poinds, and is therefore substandard.

Where can I get a British timer from? 

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Digital-Triple-Timer-Kitchen-Clock-LCD-Display-Cooking-Baking-Task-UK-SELLER-/201131951738?pt=UK_Kitchen_Accessories&hash=item2ed466067a

[Ruth]

That's great Dr Oi, but it appears to be calibrated in American Pounds instead of British Poinds, and is therefore substandard.

Where can I get a British timer from? 

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Digital-Triple-Timer-Kitchen-Clock-LCD-Display-Cooking-Baking-Task-UK-SELLER-/201131951738?pt=UK_Kitchen_Accessories&hash=item2ed466067a

Thank you

[mcshroom]

But the oven in my old place had a marvellous timer that would time for hours if you wanted to.  It also turned the oven on and off when you told it to.

I worked out how to use this about two weeks before I moved out.  It was brilliant.

 

That's pretty good, normally they turn the oven on and off at pseudorandom intervals, as a way to dissuade you from meddling.

I do of course have a computer terminal in the kitchen for this sort of thing, but that's because I belong to an older generation of nerd^[1].



_{[1] Someone actually told me this earlier.  I think it was a compliment.}

Slightly different nerd answer but I use a timer app on my phone. - https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.leinardi.kitchentimer&hl=en

[Andrij]

Thank you, stomach.  I had planned a long day out on the bike today but you've delayed me just enough that I've had to ditch those plans.  I may do a different route once the morning rush is over, but you may have ell put me off completely.