Little Eye On The Provinces

[Cudzoziemiec]

Crashed a van full of dead badgers into a bustop.

He loves badgers

[Kim]

Meanwhile in Canterbury, no bus stops were harmed: http://www.kentonline.co.uk/kentish_gazette/news/blubberneckers-13296/

[Biff]

This may appear later in the 'things you find by the roadside' thread by someone from Middlesbrough:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/middlesbrough-penis-attack-arrest-after-3238099

[Regulator]

Meanwhile in Canterbury, no bus stops were harmed: http://www.kentonline.co.uk/kentish_gazette/news/blubberneckers-13296/

Hmmm... I'd have said that was illegal transportation of animal waste.  Also, I'd be interested to see whether they had correct permission to dispore of the carcass.

[Ian H]

sentenced to 16 months in prison after officers found him concealing a 20cm knife between his buttocks

[HTFB]

Meanwhile in Canterbury, no bus stops were harmed: http://www.kentonline.co.uk/kentish_gazette/news/blubberneckers-13296/

Hmmm... I'd have said that was illegal transportation of animal waste.  Also, I'd be interested to see whether they had correct permission to dispore of the carcass.

Being a fish royal, it can only be disposed of by the Receiver of Wreck, on behalf of the Queen. Maritime and Coastguard Agency rules are here.

[Rhys W]

Not even two boxes, it was two packets.

[clarion]

I suspect that was two boxes, but even so.

[Ian H]

Ms Talbot was cleared of an allegation that she played the rock song Sex On Fire and subsequently shouted out of her office window: "Come on vicar, complain about this."

[mrcharly-YHT]

'Gun' turns out to be television remote control

[Pingu]

Just for the headline: http://www.donsidepiper.co.uk/news/local-headlines/farmers-of-the-world-ewe-nite-1-3361630

[Pingu]

The headline for this one should be the start of a music hall joke: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-26864338

[pcolbeck]

The headline for this one should be the start of a music hall joke: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-26864338

That headline couldn't be battered.

[Kim]

"Family's car catches fire in Longleat lion enclosure"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-wiltshire-27078566

[Dibdib]

"Naked man Tasered after throwing pants at police officer" [Swindon Advertiser]

[Tom M]

Thieves target homes with low self esteem:

Linky

Chris Ammonds, of West Mercia Police said: “The offenders seem to be targeting properties that seem to be insecure."

[PeteB99]

Devil worshipping, live sacrifice and "fornicating fun for all the family"

Rush over to Stevenage now

Or maybe it's a hoax

[Deano]

Romance is dead in Darlington.

This one's still not dead:

http://www.thenorthernecho.co.uk/news/11174112.Darlington_man_who_threatened_funeral_director_spared_jail_after_telling_magistrates___Prison_is_simply_not_for_me_/?ref=mr

I'll bet he rehearsed those lines.

[delthebike]

This is a nice idea. 
http://www.echo-news.co.uk/news/11176920.Have_a_banana__Our_2_000_pressies_for_hospice___s_runners/?ref=la
They should give them now so that they'll be ripe in time! 

[Kim]

Biff Tannen sighted in mini:

http://www.edp24.co.uk/news/photo_gallery_lorry_sheds_load_of_slurry_during_crash_on_a140_at_pulham_1_3580983

[Jaded]

Oh poo.

[Biff]

They know how to have a good time in Ely:

[delthebike]

I expect the food fayre will contain bruised eel pie. 

[Ian H]

Popular knob competitions.

[Basil]

Popular knob competitions.

The longest throw was by Dave Morrison, who tossed his knob 21.8m (71ft).

Hurrah!