Advice from amateur urologists needed.

[FatBloke]

Last night I got home from my commute and as I was getting off my bike my trousers snagged on the bottle cage. This necessitated a sudden movement to regain balance which resulted in a sudden coming together of the nose of my Brooks and my prostate.  

A moment of instant pain and fireworks ensued but subsided after a minute or so. No further pain.


Until... ... ... I had to urinate. It was like pissing razor blades. Wasn't too bad this morning, but the razor blades were back again just now.  

There is no blood evident, just pain.

Should I got to the doc and ask him to put his finger up my arse or should I leave it a day or two to see if it calms down?

[julk]

Sorryy to hear about your problem.
If you had no problems before the accident then I would be off to the doctor's.

A urine infection would cause painful urinating, can be accompanied by fever and feeling wrotten, but would it be triggered by the accident? Drinking plenty can flush one out if it is just starting.

If you are middle aged or more then it is possible that you have an enlarged prostate. This could be symptomless through to causing a complete blockage requiring a catheter. A visit to the doctor would identify if this is a problem.

I hope this helps.

[clarion]

See your GP without delay.  But make sure they aren't anti-bike, or they'll just put it down to your riding 'too much', and not investigate properly. 

[Moloko]

Should I go to the doc and ask him to put his finger up my arse

Only after you've been dating a week-or-so.

[LindaG]

Go see a doctor.  Sounds like there's some trauma to your prostate.  You don't want inflammation there, it can get nasty.

[Regulator]

...Should I got to the doc and ask him to put his finger up my arse ?

Don't bother your poor GP - he's probably run off his feet at the moment....


...just pop round to mine!   



 

[Torslanda]

Now who can argue with that? 

[Jaded]

Beware: Regulator is a bit like a dolphin though, in terms of the sensory equipment used to evaluate...

[FatBloke]

Beware: Regulator is a bit like a dolphin though, in terms of the sensory equipment used to evaluate...

It was bad enough earlier this year when I had what felt like a full outside broadcast unit up me jacksie!!  I certainly don't want Reg's nose up there!  

Anyway, the pain of pissing is easily steadily.  I don't half feel sorry for people with prostatitis though, I even feel sorry for people with STIs.

[Jaded]

I wasn't referring to his nose.... 

[innesh]

Anyway, the pain of pissing is easily steadily.  I don't half feel sorry for people with prostatitis though, I even feel sorry for people with STIs.

I had a urinary tract infection a few weeks ago - imagine nearly a week of that!

If I were you, I would still go to see the doc and explain the situation.  The thing is, I needed anti-biotics but it took a few days to get them - pissing about (pun intended!) with urine samples etc. before I got the magic tablets.  If you do develop an infection, the doc will be forewarned, and it might save you an uncomfortable few days, especially if your doctor is more understanding than mine. 

[Tigerrr]

Fats - sounds like a classic prostate-bruising there.  I think we can anticipate the reaction of your doctor however in this case.

As a doctor I often see chaps just like you.  These injuries are always the result of  bizarre domestic accidents - 'I just fell onto the hoover while cleaning' being a classic, along with ' I have simply no idea how that thing got inside me doctor'.  Your own marvellous story is a novel one!

Relax! Don't feel the need to invent a fantastical story about your bike saddle - nobody will believe you anyway!

Just be bold and tell the truth - we have seen it all before and these urges of yours are quite normal.  There are even plenty of examples of bike love taken a bit more 'active' as we say! The important thing is to use a good lube in future and not to get so enthusiastic as it is all quite delicate in there, as you have found!

One thing you may find if you have bruised the prostate is that you may get a rather alarming result next time you indulge in a little personal 'me-time'  - and best not to try for a 'pearl necklace' as your partner may run screaming from the house!

[innesh]

I didn't actually see the doctor (not my regularGP) only spoke on the phone, and he did say " Maybe we should get you in and have a chat about how you come to have got this".

I thought - "He thinks I'm a sodding pervert, or something!"  And no, that pun wasn't intended.

[FatBloke]

One thing you may find if you have bruised the prostate is that you may get a rather alarming result next time you indulge in a little personal 'me-time'  - and best not to try for a 'pearl necklace' as your partner may run screaming from the house!

That's all fine!   

These injuries are always the result of  bizarre domestic accidents - 'I just fell onto the hoover while cleaning' being a classic, along with ' I have simply no idea how that thing got inside me doctor'.  Your own marvellous story is a novel one!

Ok you got me bang to rights!! It's all Nutty's fault. I was trying to persuade him over to the dark side but eventually he just screamed "TAKE YOUR BLOODY BROOKS CHAMPION SPECIAL AND STICK IT RIGHT UP YOUR ARSE!!"

He said it would be the most comfortable place.   

[nuttycyclist]

 

Thanks for that last post fatters