The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread

[citoyen]

I was heading west on the M25 on Thursday afternoon, aiming for Wales. Instead of coming off the M25 to join the M4 by Heathrow, the satnav directed me onto the M3, then onto the A322 through Bracknell to join the M4 at J10. I was a bit dubious but followed its advice anyway. The A322 is a slower road, with a number of roundabouts and traffic lights to negotiate, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's genuinely quicker than dealing with the usual congestion around Heathrow.

[TheLurker]

I was heading west on the M25 on Thursday afternoon, aiming for Wales. Instead of coming off the M25 to join the M4 by Heathrow, the satnav directed me onto the M3, then onto the A322 through Bracknell to join the M4 at J10. I was a bit dubious but followed its advice anyway. The A322 is a slower road, with a number of roundabouts and traffic lights to negotiate, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's genuinely quicker than dealing with the usual congestion around Heathrow.

That's part of the route I've been using to / from Kent these 20+ years.  Every now and again you'll come a cropper with roadworks and Bracknell is best avoided at rush hour, but otherwise journey times over that leg are pretty predictable and avoiding the Heathrow corner has saved me no end of time over the years.

The other alternative when you can't even get to the M3 junction (when heading "west") is to come off at the A3 and go north about round Woking via Chobham back up to the A322.  Not fast, but still a bloody sight faster than sitting still on the outer London Orbital Car Park and you can always stop at a pub for lunch if the trip gets prolonged.

[citoyen]

Hmmm. Interesting, thanks.

[nicknack]

I was heading west on the M25 on Thursday afternoon, aiming for Wales. Instead of coming off the M25 to join the M4 by Heathrow, the satnav directed me onto the M3, then onto the A322 through Bracknell to join the M4 at J10. I was a bit dubious but followed its advice anyway. The A322 is a slower road, with a number of roundabouts and traffic lights to negotiate, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's genuinely quicker than dealing with the usual congestion around Heathrow.

That's part of the route I've been using to / from Kent these 20+ years.  Every now and again you'll come a cropper with roadworks and Bracknell is best avoided at rush hour, but otherwise journey times over that leg are pretty predictable and avoiding the Heathrow corner has saved me no end of time over the years.

The other alternative when you can't even get to the M3 junction (when heading "west") is to come off at the A3 and go north about round Woking via Chobham back up to the A322.  Not fast, but still a bloody sight faster than sitting still on the outer London Orbital Car Park and you can always stop at a pub for lunch if the trip gets prolonged.

Yup. Me too.

[T42]

With much grunting, straining, heaving and complaining and the nifty wee pushers & screwdrivers out of my watch maintenance kit (bought when I was given a Vostock Scuba, the Lada of watches) I removed a link from the Inlaw Paw's Seiko bracelet so that Mrs. T42 can wear it (she likes 'em practical).

Then realized that aforesaid kit includes a pin-driving gadget akin to a chainsplitter.

[Thing2]

Just very-nearly blew up my USA->UK mains transformer on first time of using it (in UK).  Plugged it in without first checking the input voltage selector which was of course still set to 110V rather than 240V.
[...]. Close one!

That USA to UK transformer will be the death of me. Hooked up the usain home theater kit to check if it works ok from a transformer. In my haste I managed to plug it all into the 220v rather than 110v outlet. (the 110v is a USA only socket but the 220v has one of those multiple style sockets that accept UK, European and, damn it, USA plugs)
Happily the AV receiver has a protection circuit and just didn't power on - no damage done. The sub however sat there for a few seconds before making a deep dull "thud" and will speak no more. Thankfully it was a relatively cheap one.
Large slab of gaffer tape requisitioned to cover up that 220v outlet.

Yesterday, it was my turn. I thought that the Makita battery charger handled 240V. On closer inspection it says 110V 240W and we need a new one..........

[thing1]

We've released enough magic smoke this week to summon a small army of genies.

[Si S]

When fettling cable disc brakes it does help if you actually look if there's any pad left as opposed to just twiddling all the movement out of the lever, otherwise you run out of stop a few days later 

[Torslanda]

No backbone, some people.

You're not proper hardcore until you've gone thru the pad, backplate and the bike's stopping using the remains of the piston...

[Torslanda]

...and then, of course, you go on to rant about how expensive it is to mend bikes.

[Feanor]

About 30k from the end of today's ride, I decided it was time to turn the lights on.

Back lights - fine.
Front lights - no workee.

What's the problem?
The batteries are still in the charger at home...

[Si S]

...and then, of course, you go on to rant about how expensive it is to mend bikes.

 

[ElyDave]

About 30k from the end of today's ride, I decided it was time to turn the lights on.

Back lights - fine.
Front lights - no workee.

What's the problem?
The batteries are still in the charger at home...

Hmm, had something similar happen to me just before Christmas, but in my case the freshly charged battery pack was duly strapped to the bike, but when I turned it on - kaput, nothing.  Small blinky light only, at least I had that.

[Mr Larrington]

There is a good reason why you should turn sossidges over at half-time when oven-cooking them.

Still, my jaw muscles got a good workout

[Beardy]

There is a good reason why you should turn sossidges over at half-time when oven-cooking them.

Still, my jaw muscles got a good workout

Was that 40 minutes a side or 45?

[Mr Larrington]

Either I'm a TOTAL feckin' div or there's something wrong with the oven.  Because the mash on top of tonight's shepherd's pie came out resembling a terracotta roof tile

[Basil]

You forgot to use a fork to create the furrows before putting it in the oven?

[andytheflyer]

Either I'm a TOTAL feckin' div or there's something wrong with the oven.  Because the mash on top of tonight's shepherd's pie came out resembling a terracotta roof tile

Ah, you didn't turn it over at half-time..................

[citoyen]

Either I'm a TOTAL feckin' div or there's something wrong with the oven.  Because the mash on top of tonight's shepherd's pie came out resembling a terracotta roof tile

Did you put it on the grill setting rather than the oven setting?

My wife did that last week when she was making pies. Tops were nicely cooked but the bottom was soggy raw pastry. 

Our oven is shite anyway - if you want to cook anything above 200ºC, you have to put it on at least an hour in advance for it to have any chance of getting up to temperature.

[Mr Larrington]

I did once do "grill" rather than "convection" and the resultant choking clouds of fish-flavoured smoke were a thing to bring tears of joy to the eyes of the EPA's Scott Pruitt, but I'm pretty sure I didn't this time.

[Legs]

Not the former Indycar driver Scott Pruett, though?

[Mr Larrington]

I expect the racing motor-ist wishes the other one would ["Go away" - Ed.] on a daily basis.

[Ham]

Dear Brane.

Plz to be remembering  that you have sharpened those scissors, kthxbai.

[PaulF]

Had an early flight to Southampton this morning so set off down the A34, at Newbury I took the exit to the M4 and headed for Heathrow....

[Vince]

We have a new oven. I have attempted to cook jacket potatoes on defrost setting.

(click to show/hide)

AGAIN!