Author Topic: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk  (Read 5940 times)

Apropos the “Band names that etc. “ thread- Driving up the A17 today ,I had a brilliant idea for a TV drama series that will never get made- “ Swineshead Revisited” .
There must be others in a similar vein.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #1 on: 03 May, 2018, 10:53:52 pm »
The Spy at Night
It is simpler than it looks.

ElyDave

  • Royal and Ancient Polar Bear Society member 263583
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #2 on: 03 May, 2018, 11:11:26 pm »
One foot in the gravy
Country Flies
People you live in the same street as, but don't really talk to other than to say "Hi" as they get out of their car
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #3 on: 03 May, 2018, 11:27:32 pm »
Ooh Look these people are crass and poor.  Aren't they idiots? 
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #4 on: 03 May, 2018, 11:57:17 pm »
Ooh Look these people are crass and poor.  Aren't they idiots?

Objection: That's the one that keeps getting past the commissioning desk when we really wish it wouldn't.

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #5 on: 04 May, 2018, 12:01:37 am »
Humidors Under The Hammer
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." ~ Freidrich Neitzsche

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #6 on: 04 May, 2018, 12:04:10 am »
North Enders - a soap opera set in between central Portsmouth and Hilsea...
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." ~ Freidrich Neitzsche

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #7 on: 04 May, 2018, 12:58:00 am »
Comedy driving school and 'Oh! That's NOT the gearstick, Miss Brown!' innuendo.

Are You Being Swerved?
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #8 on: 04 May, 2018, 01:54:00 am »
Mastermined - where explosive ordnance disposal is the name of the game.
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." ~ Freidrich Neitzsche

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #9 on: 04 May, 2018, 06:19:17 am »
Stash In The Attic - stoners talk about where they keep their supply so the pigs can't find it, man.
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #10 on: 04 May, 2018, 06:23:14 am »
The Jeremy Hunt Show - frighteningly low-class people with bad teeth argue about whose turn it is to take the kids to rehab while Jeremy taunts them with six month waiting lists.
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #11 on: 04 May, 2018, 07:44:04 am »
The Three R's

A documentary detailing over a number of episodes the extraordinary lengths that the government will go to to ensure that the plebs are not properly educated thus allowing the spawn of middle and privilege class Britain to run amok in spite of them being rather challenged in the grey cell area.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #12 on: 04 May, 2018, 07:47:10 am »
The Apprenticiser

14 wannabe vigilantes are taken through a ten week journey to find the next Edward Woodward.

Expect thrills, blood spills and inventive ways to kill with braces, bras and pointed shoes.
It is simpler than it looks.

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #13 on: 04 May, 2018, 08:22:46 am »
The Sty at Night - a late-night review of the day's happenings in Westminster

I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #14 on: 04 May, 2018, 10:39:03 am »
TЯumpton: an everyday story of mobsters, lawyers, pr0n stars, lawyers, special investigators, lawyers, incompetence, lawyers, lies, lawyers and Twitter.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #15 on: 04 May, 2018, 11:17:10 am »
Goodbye Goodbye: a programme set in a coverted Norfolk hotel stable. Brexiteer politicians with bad accents review the promises they made but didn't keep, whilst drinking wine and eating cheese the rest of us can no longer afford.
Get a bicycle. You will never regret it, if you live- Mark Twain

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #16 on: 04 May, 2018, 11:46:02 am »
PULL!
A dating game based at a clay pigeon shooting club.
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

fuzzy

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #17 on: 08 May, 2018, 11:49:03 am »
The Thin Blue Lino
Tales from the police station canteen.

cygnet

  • I'm part of the association
I Said, I've Got A Big Stick

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #19 on: 08 May, 2018, 01:26:17 pm »
One Foot In the Gravel - a cycling travelogue based on the Sustrans network.
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." ~ Freidrich Neitzsche

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #20 on: 08 May, 2018, 01:46:38 pm »
 ;D
It is simpler than it looks.

Beardy

  • Shedist
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #21 on: 08 May, 2018, 01:57:33 pm »
One Foot In the Gravel - a cycling travelogue based on the Sustrans network.
Surely that's a documentary on Speedway, Cycle or otherwise :)
For every complex problem in the world, there is a simple and easily understood solution that’s wrong.

Redlight

  • Enjoying life in the slow lane
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #22 on: 08 May, 2018, 04:06:06 pm »
Last of the Summer Whine -  a bunch of England cricket fans sit around discussing the previous season's performance
Why should anybody steal a watch when they can steal a bicycle?

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #23 on: 08 May, 2018, 04:25:44 pm »
Top Gear - a programme devoted to testing expensive recreational drugs, acting like arses while on them and inviting ex-cons to be the "Lag on the Reasonably-Priced Skag".
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

Re: Film and TV shows that never got past the commissioning desk
« Reply #24 on: 08 May, 2018, 04:27:37 pm »
Pointless Celebrities - no further explanation needed.

Though I suspect that many a listgram* on Channel 5 has already filled the remit.


* The TV equivalent of a listicle.
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." ~ Freidrich Neitzsche