Author Topic: Sh!te courier thread  (Read 143220 times)

ian

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #75 on: 06 October, 2015, 12:47:24 pm »
Admittedly not wanting to collapse a state of quantum indeterminacy would be a cut above the average courier excuse.

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #76 on: 14 October, 2015, 06:25:10 pm »
Bloody DPD    For some reason they won't put the small item I've ordered through my letterbox, and when I tried to get it delivered to one of their local pick up points they agreed, then came back & said it was unsuitable.   I'm not trekking out to their depot >:(     
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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #77 on: 14 October, 2015, 09:36:03 pm »
On the other hand DPD texted me on Monday to confirm that an item I'd ordered would be delivered on Tuesday, then yesterday morning to let me know that it would be delivered between 11:12 and 12:12.

Two (or maybe three) clicks on their website let me ask them to deliver it to any neighbour (I could have been more specific, but didn't know who was likely to be in), an email confirmed that this would be done, then a text at 11:54 told me which neighbour had taken it in.

I'm more than happy with DPD.

Mr Larrington

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #78 on: 17 October, 2015, 08:47:46 am »
I appreciate your conscientiousness, O postie, I really do.  But trying to deliver a package at 07:45 on a Saturday is a bit optimistic, wouldn't you say?
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robgul

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #79 on: 17 October, 2015, 02:26:06 pm »
Harking back to the past .... some of the City Link managers are being taken to some sort of court over the handling of the sudden closure/job losses last Christmas.

AND Royal Mail usually serves me well BUT three times this week the postman has left items hanging out of the letterbox (using the spring on the flap to hold them) .... OK, marks gained for initiative but lost for not thinking that we might be away and the items would be an advertisement for our absence.

Rob

ian

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #80 on: 17 October, 2015, 08:47:13 pm »
I had to eat a big slice of humble pie because my previous rant contained a big fat lie. The courier had been (they take a picture to prove it, and I can't even snark about it being from Google because I had put a new house sign up that day) but the doorbell had inexplicably failed.

OK, he could have knocked.

As is the nature of modern technology, I switched the doorbell on and off and it now works.

Tim Hall

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #81 on: 17 October, 2015, 08:53:13 pm »
I had to eat a big slice of humble pie because my previous rant contained a big fat lie. The courier had been (they take a picture to prove it, and I can't even snark about it being from Google because I had put a new house sign up that day) but the doorbell had inexplicably failed.

OK, he could have knocked.

As is the nature of modern technology, I switched the doorbell on and off and it now works.
I bet it's a wireless doorbell. They're shite IME. Always losing the connection or going quiet.
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ian

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #82 on: 17 October, 2015, 09:25:44 pm »
I had to eat a big slice of humble pie because my previous rant contained a big fat lie. The courier had been (they take a picture to prove it, and I can't even snark about it being from Google because I had put a new house sign up that day) but the doorbell had inexplicably failed.

OK, he could have knocked.

As is the nature of modern technology, I switched the doorbell on and off and it now works.
I bet it's a wireless doorbell. They're shite IME. Always losing the connection or going quiet.

Yup, that's the birdy.

robgul

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #83 on: 18 October, 2015, 10:27:24 am »
I had to eat a big slice of humble pie because my previous rant contained a big fat lie. The courier had been (they take a picture to prove it, and I can't even snark about it being from Google because I had put a new house sign up that day) but the doorbell had inexplicably failed.

OK, he could have knocked.

As is the nature of modern technology, I switched the doorbell on and off and it now works.
I bet it's a wireless doorbell. They're shite IME. Always losing the connection or going quiet.

Yup, that's the birdy.

Ah - we have a wireless door bell (with 2 chimers) that seems to consume batteries at an inconsistent rate, or decide not to work until they've been shaken to, presumably, re-establish battery contact ... just bought a mains set - one push with battery, two chimes that look like 13amp plugs and, well, just plug in .... with 30, yes 30 chime options words/tunes to choose from ... we'll see if they're any good.

Hopefully the frequency differs will be enough to stop the issue we have from time to time with car remote locking signals sometimes ringing our doorbell  ???

Rob

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #84 on: 18 October, 2015, 01:56:29 pm »
I reluctantly gave up on wireless doorbells because they're all shite[1].  You know where you are with a wire, and more importantly, so do the electrons.

Plus, if the bell-push is illuminated (impractical when battery powered) it provides a cue to the shite couriers that it might actually be connected and working.  (I've gone a step beyond that and rigged it to flash angrily in response to a knock sensor[2] on the door.)

The downside is that the glowing bell-push is occasionally too tempting for the late night drunken zombies to resist a game of Knock Down Ginger[3], but I'd rather have that than miss deliveries.


[1] Batteries and ISM band wireless being a recipe for things that don't work properly.
[2] False-positives too often (wind, neighbours door and people slamming car doors nearby) to trigger the bell directly.
[3] Other regional variations are available.

ian

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #85 on: 18 October, 2015, 06:18:56 pm »
It's a plug-in wireless jobbie, courtesy of Siemens, which disappointingly doesn't feature a suitably teutonic Ride of the Valkyrie's chime amongst the many (which are all awful and sound like someone dropping frogs on a failing Bontempi) selections.

Most couriers just leave stuff on the step or around the side of the house*, so I was exciting to find this one needed a signature. Except it didn't, the bloke just shoved it in my hand and ran off. It turned out to be six jars of chutney.

*Still the best one was Yodel and the treasure map showing the way to the back of my house and an x marking the spot on the kitchen doorstep where the parcel was to be found.

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #86 on: 23 October, 2015, 06:17:55 pm »
Bloody DPD    For some reason they won't put the small item I've ordered through my letterbox, and when I tried to get it delivered to one of their local pick up points they agreed, then came back & said it was unsuitable.   I'm not trekking out to their depot >:(   

After umpteen emails & a very offhand phone conversation my package was finally left in the communal lobby of my flat,  where I asked them to leave it 12 days ago.

At least some  of the blame lies with the vendor, who chose to put a light bracket that would fit in a small jiffy bag into an 8" x 8" x 2" box  :facepalm:
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #87 on: 23 October, 2015, 06:25:04 pm »
Why am I not surprised that this tread starts with a complaint about MyHerpes?
We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. We should do twice as much listening as talking.

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #88 on: 23 October, 2015, 10:06:45 pm »
This morning I delivered a sack truck load of reams of paper and other non-specific boxes of stuff from a medical supply company to the GP surgery at the end of the road.

Someone somewhere had been using handwriting for critical data[0], and 'A' had been parsed as '4'[1] when entering the address on the shipping label, causing the UPS driver to ignore all the obvious clues[3][4] and attempt to deliver it to our neighbours.  Who weren't in.

And this evening I had to explain to our confused neighbour why I no longer had the mystery parcel that UPS had left him a card for.


[0] ETA: With hindsight, this is the NHS, so I've no idea why I thought this was in any way remarkable.
[1] This is a new one for us, as we usually get the ones[2] where 'a' has been parsed as '2'.
[2] Usually hand-addressed envelopes containing confidential medical data, rather than parcels of office supplies.
[3] Full name of the surgery on the address label, big building with matching name in big friendly letters on it across the road, name of medical supply company on the boxes, that sort of thing.
[4] To be fair, barakta missed all this too, when she signed for the delivery.

barakta

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #89 on: 23 October, 2015, 10:44:19 pm »
Too busy trying to parse very quietly spoken delivery man who wasn't making any sense. I must have asked him to repeat himself about 3 times...  Says a lot about my ability to parse uncontextualised strangers.

Mr Larrington

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #90 on: 24 October, 2015, 09:26:58 am »
Had a letter the other day.  The house number and city corresponded to Larrington Towers and it had got wet so the ink had run a bit, but not so badly as to make "N5" look remotely like "E17" ???
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Pedaldog.

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #91 on: 07 November, 2015, 11:32:20 pm »
Friday. expecting 3 parcels with the normal postie but he only brought one. He told me that the others would probably be "Out in the van later". I knew they were signed for so I actually stayed in all afternoon waiting. Nothing came so I assumed there might have been a delay and expected them this morning. Postie called today to give e a "We tried to call...." red card. It sounds a bit suspicious that they "Tried to call" without me hearing them at the door on Friday afternoon and they obviously forgot to put the red card through my letterbox themselves and asked the Postie if he'd mind dropping off said card, asking me to go out to the depot and collect the stuff myself. I got the card today a half hour before the Post Office depot closed so will now have to wait until Monday.
With that sort of, reputation building, Shite service I'm given to wondering Who would buy the Ferkin' Post Office?
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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #92 on: 08 November, 2015, 12:37:34 am »
Yamaha Music London used a single-handed chap to deliver our boxed Clavinova last Tuesday at 20.00.

129kg lump measuring about 160x75x80cm dumped in our hallway.

Not really the courier's fault but lousy customer service...

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #93 on: 26 November, 2015, 11:14:49 am »
An unspecified courier has just delivered 2/3 of barakta's new desk.  Or at least that's what I hope it is.  Could be a robotic exoskeleton kit by the weight.  Anyway, they've gone to look for the rest of it.

An ergo-bollocks[1] specialist is coming tomorrow morning to set it all up, so I'm predicting the obvious...



[1] You can tell she doesn't have a high opinion of adaptive ergonomic equipment, can't you?

Torslanda

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #94 on: 26 November, 2015, 12:14:51 pm »
Not necessarily shite but certainly uneccessary. Every time I receive parcels via certain couriers, shortly after I receive an email or text which reads SATLO 'Your parcel has been delivered...'

I can see the point for proxy deliveries but on site & signed for?
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #95 on: 26 November, 2015, 12:30:27 pm »
Not necessarily shite but certainly uneccessary. Every time I receive parcels via certain couriers, shortly after I receive an email or text which reads SATLO 'Your parcel has been delivered...'

I can see the point for proxy deliveries but on site & signed for?

Easier and less error-prone to send a message than to work out whether to send a message.  I'm certainly not complaining, and am hoping that this technology will evolve into "we've just delivered the parcel before yours in the round" notifications, so you can hold off going to the loo at the wrong moment.

IIRC ?UPS allow you to set up an account associated with your address, so you can tweak notification options.

Wombat

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #96 on: 26 November, 2015, 12:36:57 pm »
But have you tried tussling with UPS' website, Kim?

Grim and unhelpful just doesn't do it justice.  Designed by the publicity department of MI6, I think (i.e. to avoid giving any information).
Wombat

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #97 on: 26 November, 2015, 12:47:27 pm »
But have you tried tussling with UPS' website, Kim?

Yes, I got bored and gave up.

Kim

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #98 on: 26 November, 2015, 01:11:08 pm »
An unspecified courier has just delivered 2/3 of barakta's new desk...

Does it count as grink if you type it into TextRelay?  Regardless, that's what barakta is currently subjecting TNT to.

TimC

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Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #99 on: 26 November, 2015, 03:48:11 pm »
Not necessarily shite but certainly uneccessary. Every time I receive parcels via certain couriers, shortly after I receive an email or text which reads SATLO 'Your parcel has been delivered...'

I can see the point for proxy deliveries but on site & signed for?

Quite useful when they've delivered to the wrong place. You have a fighting chance of getting it resolved while the driver's not too far away.