Onion down, but still in one piece

[Pickled Onion]

Currently stuck in a Serbian facial surgery clinic following a face-plant on day 2 of my (not so) grand tour of the Balkans. 
They won't let me go outside and my phone charger cable is still on the bike at the police station, I've read the one book I have from cover to cover four times now and am bored shitless. Locals, of course, have friends and family to bring them what they need - there's no soap or bogroll provided and food consists of bread and broth or bread and dairylee. Apart from the first day when all I got was biscuits in warm UHT milk in case I couldn't chew.
I have fractured the bone in my forehead, but luckily it's all stayed in place and no surgery required. Just plenty of stitches (12, scattered liberally).
Doc says I'm lucky, I just feel a complete idiot.

[hellymedic]

Oh dear! Mend well and fast! Hope you get back soon and get supplies of food, bogroll, electricity and entertainment.

[LittleWheelsandBig]

Bugger. Heal well.

[Canardly]

Ouch GWS. If you can borrow a charger can you not use kindle on your phone and some free downloads?

[Jurek]

Ouch!
Heal swiftly P.O.

[Pickled Onion]

Thanks for the sympathy, not that I deserve it, the off was my own stupid fault! At least I'm more sanguine about it now. Today the doc has let me use the computer - the place is virtually empty most of the day anyway.

If you've ever seen The Death of Mr Lazarescu, then you have a perfect depiction of what the first night was like, 100% authentic (that was Romania not Serbia, but only the language was different, they could have shot on location here). And if you haven't seen it, I recommend it.

I could borrow a charger cable, but I appear to have the only iPhone in Niš.

[LittleWheelsandBig]

Self-inflicted or not, it still hurts. DAMHIKT

[Biggsy]

How about we all post you a few sheets of bog roll? 

Hope you're well enough soon to not need it and be out of there.

[Gattopardo]

Is there anyone nearby or do you need someone to fly out?

[Basil]

Blimey.  Sorry to hear this.  Any idea how long they'll make you stay?

[mrcharly-YHT]

Ooh heck, that sounds painful. Headache much?

Bog roll - that seems to be a precious item across the entire balkan region. If you'd done it in Bosnia, I might have been able to rustle up a friend of a friend to help out, but no chance in Serbia!

[Asterix, the former Gaul.]

GWS PO.

Sh1t happens but it's worse when there's no bog roll..

[Pickled Onion]

GN: The guy on the next bed (mechanic, had a car fall on his head) managed to get me the use of a phone cable and I've phoned my insurance.
BN: They have declined my claim on the grounds I should have been wearing "recommended safety equipment such as helmet, elbow pads, knee pads, etc." I have, of course, strongly objected on the grounds that they are not necessarily recommended for normal on-road cycling, but
GN: Serbia has a reciprocal agreement so it should all be free anyway, apart from the drugs.

I should be allowed out in a day or two, but not allowed to cycle - bah! - so I'll have some time to see the sights of Niš and catch a bus back to Sofia. Feeling reasonably chipper and planning to come back to finish the trip at some point.

Thanks for the concern, but I'm still in one piece. A bit peed off at spending valuable leave in a hospital, with the only thing to show for it the ability to quote paragraphs of John le Carre and the loss of a few kilos of fat.

[Pickled Onion]

GWS PO.

Sh1t happens but it's worse when there's no bog roll..

I've been sneakily squirelling away the serviette we get with the bread three times a day, so no real issue. It's clear some of the other inmates are using newsprint.

[Pickled Onion]

Ooh heck, that sounds painful. Headache much?

Actually, no. Not sure if that's a good thing or not. The pain is from bruising in my back, but that's nearly sorted now. Face is a bit of a mess.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Ride hard, fall heavy, heal well, and on this occasion shit small.

[Pingu]

Ruddy Nora, PO! Heal quickly.

[Pickled Onion]

Ride hard, fall heavy, heal well, and on this occasion shit small.

No-one's asked but the bike's fine. Lucky really cos I had to bandage my head with a merino and cycle till I found someone!

[Canardly]

Which insurance co so we can avoid?

[zigzag]

gws! faceplant is something i'm not in a hurry to repeat..

[DrMekon]

Jeeze. Having fractured my face, IMO the only good thing about it is that you can now sing along with "Broken Face" by The Pixies.

GWS.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viX29CwomGM

[Phil W]

The leave thing depends on who you work for. I had an accident mtn biking on Holiday years ago and ended up in hospital.  I rang my boss after more important people. The remaining holiday was converted into sick leave. So I got to use my leave later in the year when recovered.

[Pickled Onion]

Which insurance co so we can avoid?

Coverwise, underwritten by AXA who underwrite a lot of the others too, but the conditions might vary. I've always checked carefully in the past and never seen anything untoward - they won't insure competitive cycling but normally anything else is fine. This time I didn't check. Mea culpa. Though if push came to shove I think I would have a case with the "reasonable" wording - it's not the law and none of the other cyclists are wearing one.

[Pickled Onion]

The leave thing depends on who you work for.

It does indeed (I think it's the law, but some companies think otherwise).

I can convert my leave into anything I like - I work for myself! That's why it's so valuable, I don't get paid anything when on leave or when off sick.

[T42]

Bloody hell. GWS.

Bone in forehead = skull, no? Scary.  Glad it didn't move.