Somebody (Victor Louis Smith from memory) did a song to the tune of Postman Pat once.... A snatch of which might have gone a bit like this
...
My postman's crap,
My postman's crap,
My postman's crap,
He's a miserable chap,
Early in the morning,
Well, not very early in the morning,
In fact sometimes at the crack of noon,
He <somethings> with his postbag in his hand
or not, ... my memory is hazy on the matter... I do remember a line like "... 'Photographs - DO NOT BEND' - Oh yes they do!" in there somewhere.