Can those of you who understand these things, help a newbie understand pro racing a bit more?
If I understand it right, the person who has the fastest accumulated time for the whole event, gets a fancy jumper (yellow for France, Red for Spain, Pink for Italy?). The first person past the most of certain signs on top of mountains gets to wear the spotty jumper, some of these climbs are marked on the stage drawings with a number, which seems to go from 4 to H. So my first questions.
1) Is the magic jumper for being top of the most hills always spotty? Does it vary based on which country the race is in?
2) How are the 4 to H classifications calculated?
3) Is the H cos they realised that they wanted to go up harder climbs than the 4 to 1 range they started with?
4) Why do some climbs get a number, not but all of them?
5) How are the points per climb calculated?
Next up there is the snotty jumper, that goes to the rider who is first past the most of certain signs that are not on tops of hills. These signs seem to be at least one in the middle of every stage, and one at the end, if the end is not on the top of a mountain?
6) Is this magic jumper always snotty? Does it change based on country of racing?
7) What defines how many points there are for any given special non hilly sign?
Then there is a white jumper for the youngest rider that's doing the best?
8.0) How do they define young?
9) How do they define best?
Finally a jumper for the most aggressive rider?
10) how is this calculated? Elbows furthest out on the sprints?
11) what colour is it?
11 a) Next up, if the person who makes it to the end of the race in the fastest time, is also the first to the top of the hills, the first past the special signs on the flat, the youngest, and the one with their elbows out the furthest (or what ever that criteria is). Do they get to take 5 jumpers home with them?
11 b) In the middle of a race, if the person with the magic jumper is also leading all the other things too, do the 2nd places get to wear the special jumper for that classification?
On any given stage, if you're too slow. You're OTL, which I think is Out something beginning with T of Luck, and then you're not allowed to ride again the next day?
12) how is the time for being too slow calculated? Is it a different sum depending on the type of stage?
People talk of a broom wagon? Is this a vehicle with a big broom on the front that sweeps up drivers that are so slow that not only are they OTL, they are annoying someone, and thus have to get in the broom wagon?
13) What is the broom wagon, and how does it work?
There are lots of vehicles around the pelican. Some of these belong to the teams, and have bikes on top, and inside a shouty man, and a mechanic. Then there are Yellow or Blue cars that belong to either Shimano or Mavic, which have bikes on top and a mechanic? There are red Skoda's that seem to follow the riders, and sometime have an old white guy standing out the top of them. Near the end of each stage there is a man who stands next to the barrier and waves some vehicles through a gap in the barrier.
14) What's with the red skodas? Are these race officials, or just VIP's that want a good view of some riders butt?
15) Why do they sometimes have a white bloke standing up out the top of them?
16) At the end, most of the vehicles are waved the barrier, but there's usually one or two red skodas that pull over the finish line, then stop, so some old white bloke can get out. Why?
There's lots of mopeds, they seem to be full of people with cameras, and function to provide an extra hazard for the riders to
17) Do these have any other purpose?
Having crossed the line, the bloke who did it first is usually surrounded by people, including 4 people dressed in branding of a water company who surround said rider.
18) Do these have a purpose other than getting the water companies branding on the TV while the cameras are pointing at a knackered happy rider?
When a rider is on the podium, there used to be two pretty women who would stand there and clap, now it's a pretty woman and I'm assured a pretty man, who stand there and clap.
19) Why? As much as I enjoy the site of pretty women, it's 2021, what is their purpose?
XX) Why is consistent question numbering hard?
I think that sums up all the things I've not managed to understand while watching this year's ride around France. Can anyone help answering my questions?
J