Author Topic: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread (Read 445279 times)

quixoticgeek · « **Reply #3675 on:** 17 April, 2023, 06:41:27 pm »

Ordered some electronics from Germany. Didn't notice the bit where it mentions power supply sold separately.

Now need to place a second order...

J

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #3676 on:** 17 April, 2023, 07:11:27 pm »

“Aha!” said Mr Larrington. “My route from Schloß von Brandenburg to Larrington Towers takes me right past the Happy Swedish Halls Of Joy in Greenwich. I shall buy some picture frames, that I might frame the poster from last year’s Battle Mountain event and have a couple of others in reserve!” And then checked with the knowledgeable the size of the said poster, and wrote down the size of frame required.

Whether I wrote down the frame size correctly I wot not, and the Post-It is now in a bin saarrff of the river. But I am now the proud owner of three Ribba frames which are too small for the posters. And the receipt is in the same bin as the Post-It

Ham · « **Reply #3677 on:** 23 April, 2023, 11:34:42 am »

Message to self, for future occasions. When fettling a bike on a stand and, having prepared to remove said bike on completion but noting something further to be done, please to remember to do up the stand jaws one more time, to avoid significant movement of the bike and potential pain.

andrewc · « **Reply #3678 on:** 23 April, 2023, 01:05:49 pm »

Put some linen pillow cases in the washing machine. Run a half load cycle then hear a clunking sound. There is something in there with them.

Cycle finishes & I take the stuff out. The "Something" was a tub of Renapur Leather Balsam https://renapur.com.......

How the hell am I going to get my pillow cases and more importantly my washing machine clean.......

Mrs Pingu · « **Reply #3679 on:** 23 April, 2023, 01:40:42 pm »

Having looked up the melting points it looks like it's going to need to be a boil wash (for your washer). Soda crystals may help too. Put soda crystals in your washer when you do a boil wash and you could try soaking your linen in a separate solution of the same to see if it will break down the fat.

andrewc · « **Reply #3680 on:** 23 April, 2023, 01:47:37 pm »

I'm running an empty 95C "Whites" wash at the moment. If that doesn't get the inside of the machine clean I'll have to investigate chemical warfare!

hatler · « **Reply #3681 on:** 23 April, 2023, 01:48:58 pm »

Quote from: mrcharly-YHT on 17 April, 2023, 11:38:26 am

Nominating my son-in-law.

Visited for a week and sensibly brought his bike.

Leaving Sat on the ferry, he packs car, carefully taking wheels off bike and putting frame in first. All other luggage (lots when you have a toddler) added.

We leave them at ferry port and drive home. 5 min after driving home, phone call. Wheels left behind.

Cue dash to ferry port, arriving just in time (daughter is waiting in the port car park, SiL has driven onto ferry). Daughter then runs after car, one wheel in each hand.

Ah, that brings back a moment of extreme divness from many years ago. Do we allow historic events in this thread ?

robgul · « **Reply #3682 on:** 23 April, 2023, 02:22:21 pm »

Quote from: hatler on 23 April, 2023, 01:48:58 pm

Quote from: mrcharly-YHT on 17 April, 2023, 11:38:26 am
Nominating my son-in-law.

Visited for a week and sensibly brought his bike.

Leaving Sat on the ferry, he packs car, carefully taking wheels off bike and putting frame in first. All other luggage (lots when you have a toddler) added.

We leave them at ferry port and drive home. 5 min after driving home, phone call. Wheels left behind.

Cue dash to ferry port, arriving just in time (daughter is waiting in the port car park, SiL has driven onto ferry). Daughter then runs after car, one wheel in each hand.
Ah, that brings back a moment of extreme divness from many years ago. Do we allow historic events in this thread ?

Across the road from where I used to live is a car park for the Stratford Greenway (NCN Rte 5, if you must) - over the years I must have taken at least half a dozen front wheels to the Police station lost property where people have, presumably, taken the wheel out and put the frame in their car and forgotten the wheel.

Tim Hall · « **Reply #3683 on:** 23 April, 2023, 06:09:36 pm »

Quote from: andrewc on 23 April, 2023, 01:05:49 pm

Put some linen pillow cases in the washing machine. Run a half load cycle then hear a clunking sound. There is something in there with them.

Cycle finishes & I take the stuff out. The "Something" was a tub of Renapur Leather Balsam https://renapur.com.......

How the hell am I going to get my pillow cases and more importantly my washing machine clean.......

Some years ago a friend gathered her duvet cover off the bed, where it had been placed after removing from the duvet, and slung it in the washing machine.
The next two things occurred more or less simultaneously:
1. Wondering where her phone was.
2. Wondering what the clunking noise coming from the washing machine was.

Kim · « **Reply #3684 on:** 24 April, 2023, 12:10:17 am »

Filling my not-my-car with motor-spirit after a long day of silly bike racing and slow going in atrocious weather on the M5, I returned from the till (not-my-fuelcard doesn't allow pay at pump) and got within arm's reach of opening the wrong car. The adjacent pump was occupied by one that looked broadly similar: Reasonably car-shaped, white, with colourful vinyl wrap logos, etc. so it was an easy mistake to make.

(click to show/hide)

Pingu · « **Reply #3685 on:** 24 April, 2023, 12:58:49 am »

A fine effort

MattH · « **Reply #3686 on:** 24 April, 2023, 07:46:52 am »

I was making up a new radio box for my P2W yesterday (putting a PMR vehicle radio into a Peli case with antenna that'll go on my top box rack, to remove battery limitations and give better comms range compared to a handheld on my belt) as I couldn't fit one under the seat as I did on my last bike. Got to the point of being ready to solder the Peltor/Nexus headset jack on the cable (having remembered to slide the cable shell onto the cable first, not going to catch me out again with that rookie error), when I realised I couldn't find the crimp ring that acts as strain relief and holds the cable to the jack. So a look around, including moving the radio box and a few minutes later found the crimp ring on one side of the coffee table I was working on - carefully put to the side so I wouldn't knock it off and lose it.

So I went back to the radio box, and now couldn't find the shell I'd just put on. A good fifteen minutes of looking inside the box, inside my tool boxes, under the sofa, everywhere - including getting MrsH to help. Disappeared. So eventually I gave up for the afternoon and checked what availability was for a replacement (they'd been out of stock for ages at Mouser, but there they are "only" £19 each, compared to almost double anywhere else). When MrsH went to bed I thought I'd have another look, and found it in 5 seconds under the sofa where we'd both looked multiple times

The other slightly odd thing was that I found it before, not immediately after, ordering a replacement.

T42 · « **Reply #3687 on:** 24 April, 2023, 08:19:40 am »

Quote from: Kim on 24 April, 2023, 12:10:17 am

Filling my not-my-car with motor-spirit after a long day of silly bike racing and slow going in atrocious weather on the M5, I returned from the till (not-my-fuelcard doesn't allow pay at pump) and got within arm's reach of opening the wrong car. The adjacent pump was occupied by one that looked broadly similar: Reasonably car-shaped, white, with colourful vinyl wrap logos, etc. so it was an easy mistake to make.

(click to show/hide)
Fortunately at the last moment I realised that car-club cars don't usually have 'POLICE' written on them in large, unfriendly letters.

At least you didn't get shot.

Kim · « **Reply #3688 on:** 24 April, 2023, 12:23:51 pm »

That thought did occur...

Ham · « **Reply #3689 on:** 27 April, 2023, 08:30:05 am »

Gather round amateurs, see how it's done.

Little bit of scene setting, from my employment. We use some repository software that, in this instance will cost >£100k for a one time license, we need to use it in a way we have not done before, although we have teams of people in India trained in it. So clearly sending a mail to the directors of the supplying company, copying to all and sundry is a sensible way to go. The circle will get wider as various out of office are received. Eventually it ends up with their tech support team.

When their tech support team reply saying "We have no experience with <product> but call us and see what we can do" It is appropriate to get up a head of steam and compose a really sarky mail, after all who else would know what to do with it? In this instance, I just saved myself from even worse embarrassment from hitting send by realising I had been talking to entirely the wrong supplier.........

robgul · « **Reply #3690 on:** 27 April, 2023, 07:30:23 pm »

Not me but a bike servicing customer . . . just brought the frame and forks for the bike to be serviced . . didn't think I'd need the wheels - I've emailed his mother asking her to bring the wheels.

As an aside it's a bit of an oddball being a Halfords Carrera "entry level road bike" that's been (I assume retro) fitted with an Ultegra chainset, BB & derailleurs! [original machine retailed at £449 but was always discounted to £299]

JefO · « **Reply #3691 on:** 27 April, 2023, 08:32:18 pm »

Quote from: Ham on 27 April, 2023, 08:30:05 am

In this instance, I just saved myself from even worse embarrassment from hitting send by realising I had been talking to entirely the wrong supplier.........

Good save!

MattH · « **Reply #3692 on:** 29 April, 2023, 03:34:50 pm »

Quote from: robgul on 27 April, 2023, 07:30:23 pm

As an aside it's a bit of an oddball being a Halfords Carrera "entry level road bike" that's been (I assume retro) fitted with an Ultegra chainset, BB & derailleurs! [original machine retailed at £449 but was always discounted to £299]

My hardtail MTB that I bought about 20 years ago to potter about with the kids on is a Claud Butler that cost me £199 new. Within three years it was on a mainly LX groupset (including hubs for the handbuilt Mavic Pro wheels) but with XTR shifters (those where you flick the brake lever up or down to change gear). The rear LX mech was one of the reverse type specifically for use with those shifters so both levers work in the same direction. The shifters alone were worth far more than the base bike cost, but worked really well for me with a hand injury I had at the time that meant I couldn't use trigger shifters and I couldn't get along with twist ones. I still use that bike, though it's had no component updates in the last decade.

andrewc · « **Reply #3693 on:** 01 May, 2023, 08:23:59 pm »

I buy olive oil in 5l containers, which I then decant into an old wine bottle with a pouring spout jammed into the top.

I've just used this to top up my glass of red wine...... it doesn't improve the flavour.

JefO · « **Reply #3694 on:** 01 May, 2023, 10:05:35 pm »

Managed to trap a fox in my shed last night. Bit of a mess (a lot of stuff no longer in the roof space/ rafters), when I went to get the pump out at 5.30am, and had to leave the door ajar all day while I was cycling. Couldn't do any more than that, as I was meeting my mate at 06.00!

Mrs Pingu · « **Reply #3695 on:** 06 May, 2023, 10:39:08 am »

Last night when I got home from work I made myself a cup of tea. I carefully dumped out all the day before's tea leaves and washed the little receptacle.
Only when I was drinking my 2nd cup from the flask did I notice that I was drinking homeopathic tea.

Kim · « **Reply #3696 on:** 06 May, 2023, 10:58:13 am »

[Placeholder for barakta's lost phone]

rafletcher · « **Reply #3697 on:** 06 May, 2023, 01:23:29 pm »

Quote from: Kim on 06 May, 2023, 10:58:13 am

[Placeholder for barakta's lost phone]

Ah, was that what Andrew C was referring to as being found in her bra.

rafletcher · « **Reply #3698 on:** 07 May, 2023, 07:45:25 pm »

Today I was coming down our steep and narrow stairs, which have a 90 degree turn at the bottom. Distracted, I got to the bottom step, and took the last step - except I was still 1 step up from the bottom. Cue a full length pitch, fortunately missing table and chairs, though collecting a significant bruise on mt forearm and shoulder from being arrested by the back of the sofa.

T42 · « **Reply #3699 on:** 08 May, 2023, 08:23:45 am »

Quote from: rafletcher on 07 May, 2023, 07:45:25 pm

Today I was coming down our steep and narrow stairs, which have a 90 degree turn at the bottom. Distracted, I got to the bottom step, and took the last step - except I was still 1 step up from the bottom. Cue a full length pitch, fortunately missing table and chairs, though collecting a significant bruise on mt forearm and shoulder from being arrested by the back of the sofa.

Lucky. I did exactly that in July 2018, coming down on my bent right leg and putting a tear into the quad. Needed an elastic bandage for 2 weeks, couldn't lift foot high enough to put trousers on, had to do it lying down. Nearly a month before I could ride pain-free.