Yet Another Cycling Forum

Random Musings => Miscellany => Kidstuff => Topic started by: Wowbagger on 27 April, 2013, 11:32:17 am

Title: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Wowbagger on 27 April, 2013, 11:32:17 am
Quote
I'll put you two on eBay in a minute if you don't pack it in. You're doin me eddin.

On a train going to Fenchurch Street.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on 15 May, 2013, 07:42:25 am
Mum: Kirsten, will you hang these bird feeders in the tree in the front garden please?

Me: ok. *does so*

Mum: you've hung those too high, the birds don't like it.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on 04 July, 2014, 01:22:31 pm
Not parental but teacherly - from the school newsletter:
Quote
We've had fun with angles and triangles in Maths - just how many triangles can be drawn in a 6 point circle?
I know what it means, probably, but since when did a circle have points?
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: hellymedic on 04 July, 2014, 04:53:14 pm
Quote from: Cudzoziemiec on 04 July, 2014, 01:22:31 pm
Not parental but teacherly - from the school newsletter:
Quote
We've had fun with angles and triangles in Maths - just how many triangles can be drawn in a 6 point circle?
I know what it means, probably, but since when did a circle have points?

When you drew a six-petalled 'flower' inside it, using just your compasses, then joined the tips of the petals to make a hexagon.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on 26 August, 2014, 10:57:08 am
On a plane, row behind me.
Mother: Where's your head?
Toddler: Here.
Mother: Well, that's where the people are.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Wowbagger on 15 February, 2017, 10:55:19 pm
Wandering along Bishopsgate this evening...

Parents and small girl reciting bits about Christopher Robin going down with Alice.

"Who was Alice?" asks small girl.

"She looked after Winnie-ther-Pooh."

Like fuck she did.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: jsabine on 15 February, 2017, 11:42:49 pm
Well, who the fuck *is* Alice?

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: rr on 16 February, 2017, 12:18:25 am
Or a reference to a bawdy song (http://www.traditionalmusic.co.uk/bawdy-songs/001807.HTM), popular at bar nights when I was pso
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: DuncanM on 02 March, 2017, 02:37:34 pm
Heard in various supermarkets throughout my youth:
"Oi <insert childs name here>! Come year for a slap!"
I always thought that was an unlikely incentive!
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Paul on 02 March, 2017, 09:45:48 pm
Booking a trip to Ireland for my mum:

YT "How long do you want to go for?"

Ma "7 days at the most, but it's not worth going for less than a week".
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: ElyDave on 02 March, 2017, 10:52:37 pm
Friends mum, scolding dog who'd been somewhat naughty

" you're an animal!"
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on 30 April, 2022, 11:46:24 am
Assistant in a shop I regularly go in: You don't bring your son in here anymore. Has he just reached the age where he no longer wants to go shopping with dad?
Me: Yes. He's 17, almost 18 in fact.
Shoppie: Is it weird having an 18-year old son?
Me: No. I mean, it's not like I just woke up one morning and he was suddenly 18.
Shoppie: No, I suppose you've had 18 years to get used to it.
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Peter on 30 April, 2022, 11:55:48 am
You never get used to it.  My daughter has been 18 for 13 years, now, and I'm still not used to it!
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Wowbagger on 30 April, 2022, 11:29:40 pm
How old was she when she started being 18?
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Peter on 01 May, 2022, 11:36:22 am
Nice one, Wow - but in truth, it's impossible to say!
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: Canardly on 01 May, 2022, 11:59:07 am
"Bike, I'll give you bike!"  (Apologies to Billy Connolly).
Title: Re: Befuddling parental utterances
Post by: hellymedic on 03 May, 2022, 10:47:27 pm
Quote from: Wowbagger on 30 April, 2022, 11:29:40 pm
How old was she when she started being 18?

My Mum congratulated granddaughter on turning 13 and officially becoming a teenager.

'How long have yo been a teenager?'
'Since birth!'