First-World Problems.

[citoyen]

I guess they're rolled oat flakes, small ones not the big ones usually sold as porridge oats.

Ready Brek?

My FWP is that I can't eat breakfast cereal with milk. Just hate it. I sometimes have proper hot porridge, made with water like the true Scotsman that I am not. Sometimes Bircher type muesli, made the night before with apple juice rather than milk. Adding a dollop of yoghurt is fine, but milk... bleurgh!

I prefer to make my own muesli - most of the pre-prepared shit is, well, shit. Alpen can fuck right off. What do they put in that shit? It's shit, whatever it is.

Most of the time, I don't have cereal at all. Poached eggs on homemade sourdough toast is the usual breakfast preference. Like the total fucking hipster that I am.

[Basil]

I'm lucky.  I just can't eat breakfast, so I don't have this problem.
A couple of pieces of marmite toast and some yoghurt for elevenses and that's me done till the  evening meal.

[Canardly]

1. My Beef Bourgignon was a disappointment. The lardons were smoked and I hadn't noticed, overpowered the dish, but the orange peel worked well and I will use again. I will also try a Cabernet Sauvignon rather than a a Shiraz.  I also want to try cheeks next time, cooked slowly overnight. The mash however, was brilliant.

2.  How come a pack of Spam Fritters is cheaper in Iceland that a tin of Spam elsewhere?

[Cudzoziemiec]

I guess they're rolled oat flakes, small ones not the big ones usually sold as porridge oats.

Ready Brek?

Yeurgh! Is that stuff even oats? Anyway, I often ride past Berkeley Magnox site, I've got my own nuclear glow!*

Alpen can fuck right off. What do they put in that shit? It's shit, whatever it is.

I think it contains huge quantities of powdered milk, which isn't going to go down well with you, and sugar. Along with some dusty sort of oat powder. Maybe reconstituted hazelnuts.

*You can ride along the estuary dyke thing and then take another path which brings you actually inside the perimeter fence. All totally legal. Well, not totally, cos it's technically a footpath. You're only in the car park but still...

[ian]

I like Alpen. It's Swiss, like Toblerone, and I can pretend that even though it's probably made entirely out of sugar it's really far healthier than Count Chocula. There's a reduced sugar version of Alpen to which I can only pose the question: why? I want the sugar. That said, I think the only thing with more sugar than Count Chocula is Tate & Lyle.

I mostly eat buttered toast for breakie these days. I find I have to eat about a kilo of any breakfast cereal (the proposed portion size for cereals, really, I'd be an emaciated corpse by lunchtime).

If I'm going to eat porridge it has to be Ready Brek. Actual porridge is just warmed up sick eaten by people who truly have no comprehension of their weirdness. And made with water! What foul Hell do you inhabit?

[citoyen]

Actual porridge is just warmed up sick eaten by people who truly have no comprehension of their weirdness. And made with water! What foul Hell do you inhabit?

Scotland, obviously.

(Albeit only spiritually rather than literally.)

[citoyen]

I think it contains huge quantities of powdered milk, which isn't going to go down well with you, and sugar.

Yep, exactly that.

Sugar is actually listed above the powdered milk in the ingredients.

[ian]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

But I can't do breakfast cereal portions. You can get Alpen in 1kg bags which caters for about three days.

Breakfast cereal in my experience consists of things that taste like cardboard and are supposed to be good for you and things that taste like food but have so much sugar that you may as well get a fat man to use your pancreas as a trampoline. If I recall, Kellogg invented breakfast cereals to stop people masturbating presumably on the basis they'd not have the energy later in the day after a 30g suggested serving size.

[Mr Larrington]

An unimpeachable source* maintains that breakfast cereal is made from the little curly wood shavings from pencil sharpeners an who am I to argue.

* Famous chocolatier and squirrel trainer W Wonka

[Greenbank]

An unimpeachable source* maintains that breakfast cereal is made from the little curly wood shavings from pencil sharpeners an who am I to argue.

* Famous chocolatier and squirrel trainer W Wonka

"Flaked Corns"

[quixoticgeek]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

But I can't do breakfast cereal portions. You can get Alpen in 1kg bags which caters for about three days.

Breakfast cereal in my experience consists of things that taste like cardboard and are supposed to be good for you and things that taste like food but have so much sugar that you may as well get a fat man to use your pancreas as a trampoline. If I recall, Kellogg invented breakfast cereals to stop people masturbating presumably on the basis they'd not have the energy later in the day after a 30g suggested serving size.

I don't understand any of the breakfast cereals. They all have the consistency of vomit by the time you've added the milk. They have about as much appeal as eating vomit...

J

[ian]

I dunno, Count Chocula is awesome (better than the Boo-Berry and Fruit Brute, which could be dangerously healthy). But that's really just like eating cake. They have so much high-fructose corn syrup that your eyes can vibrate right out of your skull and find yourself looking back at yourself slurping up chocolate milk like a thirsty elephant and thinking I should stop. But you can't, because it's basically breakfast crack and you'd kill your own mother and then other people's mothers to get more. I personally have no idea why so many American kids have A Disorder. Let them bounce off enough walls to stun them would be my practical parenting tip.

[Greenbank]

Expecting three deliveries today, two of which should contain an item that would allow me to reconnect my second monitor to my laptop.

Door just went and it was the other delivery (a boring 4-way extension cable that I don't even need yet as I haven't ordered the replacement desk).

[EDIT] And just got an email. One of the deliveries is delayed as they can't find one of the items that was supposed to be in stock and they're scrabbling around a warehouse to try and find it. So a ~£200 order of computer stuff is being held back because of a single generic 50cm grey Cat-6 network cable (that, again, I don't really need right now).

[phantasmagoriana]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

Did you never sample the delights of a macaroni pie? Probably the best thing about living in Scotland.

[Mr Larrington]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

Did you never sample the delights of a macaroni pie? Probably the best thing about living in Scotland.

(Consults Mr Google; decides he likes the sound of Makaronilaatikko, wot is the Finnish version)

[ian]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

Did you never sample the delights of a macaroni pie? Probably the best thing about living in Scotland.

I don't think I did, but macaroni cheese is an American staple stodge, often deployed as a side dish to avoid inadvertent vegetable consumption. Obviously with extra cheese and bacon on top. And underneath.

[Mrs Pingu]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

Did you never sample the delights of a macaroni pie? Probably the best thing about living in Scotland.

(Consults Mr Google; decides he likes the sound of Makaronilaatikko, wot is the Finnish version)

That's not a pie! Where's the pastry?

[Auntie Helen]

I used to live in Scotland, and not I never got the porridge with water, and good god, salt. Ready Brek with milk and then oodles of golden syrup or a thick crust of brown sugar. I hate to say it, but Scottish food tends towards the terrible.

Did you never sample the delights of a macaroni pie? Probably the best thing about living in Scotland.

(Consults Mr Google; decides he likes the sound of Makaronilaatikko, wot is the Finnish version)

That's not a pie! Where's the pastry?

Banoffee Pie is a pie without pastry.

[ian]

Order! Banoffee Pie has a biscuit crust. Biscuit is just posh pastry.

[Basil]

No pastry in a Shepherd's Pie. 

[Auntie Helen]

Yes but it’s biscuit, not pastry!

[Cudzoziemiec]

No pastry in a Shepherd's Pie.

Shepherd's pie is crook though.

[Greenbank]

Pies are fully enclosed in pastry.

Discuss.

[ian]

Biscuit is first-world pastry.

[TheLurker]

No pastry in a Shepherd's Pie.

Shepherd's pie is crook though.

I see what you did there.  Bad Cudzo.