Yet Another Cycling Forum
Random Musings => Miscellany => Grow Your Own => Topic started by: Kathy on 04 May, 2009, 10:21:02 pm
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We went to the local garden centre (http://www.chessingtongardencentre.co.uk/store/) today to buy a table and chairs for the garden. Now, I'm usually fairly underwhelmed by garden centres, but this one had some terribly impressive specimins on sale, ranging from eight-hundred-quid olive trees to pitcher plants big enough to drown Kitty in, and the staff were lovely when our car broke down and let us use their phone and sit in the warm cafe eating nommy tutti-fruiti-yoghurt slices whilst we waited for the breakdown man outside to fix the car in the rain, but I digress...
Anyway, just past the amazingly huge pitcher plants and the red banana trees (if I'd known how much banana plants cost I'd have taken better care of all the ones I killed) I noticed some little shiny green leaves winking cheekily at me.
I am now the proud parent of a coffee plant! :thumbsup: And when civilization collapses and zombies roam the streets, providing I haven't killed little Ahmed and he's grown big enough to produce beans, you are *so* all going to be jealous of me! ;D
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The gentleman I know who used to run a coffee factory informs me you can not grow decent organic coffee therefore you may need to lay in a stockpile of chemicals as well.
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*Not at all envious, no, not even a little ... hem ...*
That is quite cool. How big does it have to get to give a reliable supply of beans for the annual post-apocalypse coffee ceremony? (And/or: How much warmer?)
I *am* impressed.
But not jealous, no, not even a little bit ;)
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I am now the proud parent of a coffee plant!
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If you harvest it in a rush does it produce expresso, or am I bean hasty?
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*Not at all envious, no, not even a little ... hem ...*
That is quite cool. How big does it have to get to give a reliable supply of beans for the annual post-apocalypse coffee ceremony? (And/or: How much warmer?)
Apparently he needs to be a few years old before he will flower, and he's only six inches tall at the moment, so he's got some way to go. I've been googling for how to care for him, and they sound pretty robust - everyone on the internet is giving different advice, and the plants seem to thrive regardless of whether they're in Canada or Texas. They just need to be well-watered, and repotted regularly (one estimate I saw reckoned on a foot of growth per year) and kept somewhere very bright but not direct sunlight.
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I am now the proud parent of a coffee plant!
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If you harvest it in a rush does it produce expresso, or am I bean hasty?
::-)
<grinds teeth>
;)
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... and kept somewhere very bright but not direct sunlight.
So, not really the UK then. ;D
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All the coffee I buy is grown on hills
Do you have a windswept hill 'cos that's how you get robusta :P
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Once the zombies have eaten everyone else's brains, there'll be enough freeze-dried stuff in the supermarkets to last several lifetimes, I reckon. Of course, it would mean breaking in and stealing it :o
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Yeah, sod growing it myself - I'll be happy opening scavenged tins of Lavazza with the pointy end of my machete to get my fix of Joe after the Zombies have all rotted away.
Just had a nasty thought though. Supposing you manage to get this plant to produce coffee beans and supposing the ferts eat them all...?
Could you be onto an even more highly prized variety of coffee than Kopi Luwak (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak)?
:D
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Yeah, sod growing it myself - I'll be happy opening scavenged tins of Lavazza with the pointy end of my machete to get my fix of Joe after the Zombies have all rotted away.
Just had a nasty thought though. Supposing you manage to get this plant to produce coffee beans and supposing the ferts eat them all...?
Could you be onto an even more highly prized variety of coffee than Kopi Luwak (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak)?
:D
One of Tim's first statements on buying it was that I wasn't allowed to make weasel-poo coffee. Besides, the plant had a big warning saying that uncooked beans are poisonous to people, but was somewhat vague about the toxicity in mustellids. ::-)
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But if they *happen* to get et, you're going to make coffee from them, ain't ya?