Author Topic: In what new Olympic sport could YOU win gold? (Read 3567 times)

rogerzilla · « **on:** 10 August, 2012, 06:41:11 pm »

Let's see those hidden talents. I might have a good chance at road downhill cycling, since most pros are notoriously crap at descending. I'm also very good at wasp swatting and cat attracting.

dasmoth · « **Reply #1 on:** 10 August, 2012, 06:43:05 pm »

Ekranoplan racing

.

Failing that... um... Could probably muck out the stables for the equestrians.

Kim · « **Reply #2 on:** 10 August, 2012, 06:52:22 pm »

Comedy Off Roading On Mildly Inappropriate Bikes.

But I'd be disqualified for failing a drugs test.

Rig of Jarkness · « **Reply #3 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:03:03 pm »

Weight training.

My training always weights until tomorrow...

dasmoth · « **Reply #4 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:03:30 pm »

Quote from: Kim on 10 August, 2012, 06:52:22 pm

Comedy Off Roading On Mildly Inappropriate Bikes.

I fear that if the UCI got involved, your preferred steed might be ruled more-than-mildly inappropriate.

(Actually, some non-UCI-approved cycling events could be just what the Games needs).

Eccentrica Gallumbits · « **Reply #5 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:05:10 pm »

[post redacted as NSFW]

Julian · « **Reply #6 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:06:00 pm »

Grinking.

Although I suspect I might be pushed off the podium by barakta.

Wowbagger · « **Reply #7 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:08:46 pm »

I've already got one - duplicate bridge.

Novice pairs.

Very slow cycling.

Snakehips · « **Reply #8 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:14:01 pm »

Swinging the lead

welshwheels · « **Reply #9 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:18:46 pm »

putting off legog till next year I have been district champion for the last four years

Kim · « **Reply #10 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:25:46 pm »

Quote from: Julian on 10 August, 2012, 07:06:00 pm

Grinking.

Although I suspect I might be pushed off the podium by barakta.

It'd be an event worth watching

jogler · « **Reply #11 on:** 10 August, 2012, 07:26:51 pm »

ICBA-ing

Butterfly · « **Reply #12 on:** 10 August, 2012, 08:36:16 pm »

Getting distracted.

cuddy duck · « **Reply #13 on:** 10 August, 2012, 08:50:55 pm »

Had I been competing in the fifties I'd've been world record holder for number of smoke rings blown from a single pull of cig or pipe.

Wowbagger · « **Reply #14 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:33:02 pm »

Aren't Julian & Charlotte currently Gold & Silver medallists in some sort of tea-drinking and cake-eating conversation competition?

rogerzilla · « **Reply #15 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:37:35 pm »

Quote from: cuddy duck on 10 August, 2012, 08:50:55 pm

Had I been competing in the fifties I'd've been world record holder for number of smoke rings blown from a single pull of cig or pipe.

I'd buy a ticket for that.

ian · « **Reply #16 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:38:16 pm »

Quote from: Julian on 10 August, 2012, 07:06:00 pm

Grinking.

Although I suspect I might be pushed off the podium by barakta.

Procrastination. I'd definitely win the gold tomorrow.

[if there's a long grink category to the grinking, then I'm there - I did a 9,000 word grink to EDF in the style of Arthur Conan Doyle, all about their inability to get Sherlock Holmes's address right, much like my own. To EDF's credit they still address the bill to the 'The Electricity Meter, Adjacent Cycle Shed' which either means I've met my match and will end up with silver medal, or they really are that fucking dumb.]

Gus · « **Reply #17 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:40:21 pm »

breaking collarbones.

Julian · « **Reply #18 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:44:27 pm »

Quote from: Wowbagger on 10 August, 2012, 09:33:02 pm

Aren't Julian & Charlotte currently Gold & Silver medallists in some sort of tea-drinking and cake-eating conversation competition?

Good point!

When tea-duelling is an Olympic sport, I fully expect to make the finals.

Now if only my school had offered tea-duelling alongside the usual offerings of lacrosse (ugh), netball, rounders and athletics (double ugh) then I might have managed to be good at games....

mike · « **Reply #19 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:46:00 pm »

catching and releasing flies. It's all about the approach...

andrewc · « **Reply #20 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:50:43 pm »

Avoiding housework. I had to do a weeks washing up before I could cook tonight.....

Butterfly · « **Reply #21 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:54:23 pm »

Quote from: andrewc on 10 August, 2012, 09:50:43 pm

Avoiding housework. I had to do a weeks washing up before I could cook tonight.....

I might be able to take the opposite sex medal for that

.

rogerzilla · « **Reply #22 on:** 10 August, 2012, 09:59:04 pm »

Quote from: mike on 10 August, 2012, 09:46:00 pm

catching and releasing flies. It's all about the approach...

Squashing flies in mid air. If a fly lands on your cake, clap about six inches above the cake. The fly has a reflex action to danger which involves a jump, right in between your closing hands.

I demonstrated this on a CTC ride to Faringdon a few years ago. It works brilliantly but the downside is that you then have to go and wash fly guts off your palms.

I suspect this would be banned as on a par with shooting live pigeons from the traps.

Wowbagger · « **Reply #23 on:** 10 August, 2012, 10:00:32 pm »

Balancing teetering piles of crap on my desk.

Kim · « **Reply #24 on:** 10 August, 2012, 10:04:05 pm »

Quote from: rogerzilla on 10 August, 2012, 09:59:04 pm

Squashing flies in mid air. If a fly lands on your cake, clap about six inches above the cake. The fly has a reflex action to danger which involves a jump, right in between your closing hands.

This sort of fiendish cunning in the face of being physically outclassed demonstrates why we're at the top of the food chain.