Now, I do have one chin hair that is three times as thick as the rest, a real Turkish chest-hair cable it is, but I'm not de-evolving, just variating randomly.
A good old scour of the intertubes says that this is either plague or guttate psoriasis. Plague can be sorted with antibiotics and g.p. runs its course in a few weeks, or can be clobbered by the doc if it doesn't (and it responds to sunlight, yay). I sense the recent intense stress at work (a "hulk smash" moment or two) as a trigger, the timing fits. The good news is that it's not contagious so I can continue to swim.
Just in case, I've boil-washed the cat and de-fleaed the bedding.