What's to dislike about Audaxes.

[sub55]

Finding control points in perms.

More specifically ,  going into a village shop to buy something , i dont really want or need in order to get a receipt.   5 miles down the road ,in a flash of inspiration , realised that i did`nt collect a receipt.   Turned around, retraced ,  buy more crap that i neither need nor want to get a receipt! 

Done it twice this year.  I know i`m a prat. 

[nmcgann]

  Timetrialing is far, far more painful than Audax.  

If you feel the same after a TT as you did after an Audax, you're not TTing hard enough.

Oh I don't know - an hour of excruciating torture vs. 9 hours of low-level misery  - quite close overall

[LEE]

Pounding the road right through the night with nothing to look at but the patch of illuminated tarmac ahead. Those are the long hours for me.

Having to clench my teeth (and buttocks) every time I ride through a puddle at high speed because I'm never sure nowadays whether it's just a puddle or a deep crater about to snap my front wheel off and compress my spine by about 6".

[Alouicious]

  Timetrialing is far, far more painful than Audax.  

If you feel the same after a TT as you did after an Audax, you're not TTing hard enough.

Oh I don't know - an hour of excruciating torture vs. 9 hours of low-level misery  - quite close overall

Life is exactly what you make it.

If a cyclist's bag is to be unable to stand up after a TT, that's OK.

11 hours of pleasant undulating countryside cycling is my bag.

[L CC]

That 'nice man' who wont drop you however slow you go because he 'chivalrously' doesn't like leaving a female to ride alone.

He is the most tedious company in the world.

(Blokes reading this who have ridden with me: Don't be daft, of course I don't mean you)

[Assasin]

It Can't be me.
I can't keep up !!

[YahudaMoon]

Spending more than 4 hours on a bike.....I'll get my coat 

(I get bored and my backside starts to ache)

Ha ha ha. Maybe you like racing short distance then ? or your on the wrong forum ??

Your welcome here whatever cycling your into anyway

John

  I used to audax (only up to 200k really), but have turned to timetrialling in the last few years. It's a similar net amount of pain, just compressed and intensified into a much shorter timespan    (and my backside never gets long enough to ache  )

Talking of TT. I wanna mix the Long with the TT this year and do that Mersey 24 ?.
Been doing it 4 year though never got round to it. Maybe this year ?

[Salvatore]

I NEVER look at routesheets until I set off. Spoils the adventure.

I can see it now. AUK's flagship event in 2013 - the London-???-London. Our very own magical mystery tour.

That's not such a dumb idea- a 200 in which you only get the routesheet and destination for each stage as you complete the last might be quite fun!

When I rode the Denmead 400 for the first time, I picked up my routesheet at the start, and didn't have any idea where I was going. The routesheet didn't give many clues, not mentioning the control towns. The first control was at the Friar Tuck, the second was at Tesco (on the outskirts of Frome as I later learned) , and only a sneeky peek at the brevet in the café there told me I was going to the seaside (Weston Super Mare).

For a real adventure, try a 1200 following a routesheet in a language you don't know. But see sig.

[Jacques]

Turning on the radio the morning of a ride & hearing one of those tunes that you hate & then it instantly starts up in your head as soon as you start pedalling. Five hours later & you could happily murder the bloke who wrote it or sings it.

Pet dislike on a route sheet is "R on a LH bend descending steep hill" For some reason I have panic attacks when I read this & have to repeat it several times to myself on the approach in case I get the 2 mixed up!

[frankly frankie]

Laney routes.

[Ian H]

Laney routes.

You and Rocco.

[Assasin]

Datebars

[GrahamG]

Cafes that only serve instant coffee. I mean, not even a filter pot. That gets me down more than anything else

[Karla]

Laney routes.

Indeed.  Routes that are slow, tricky to navigate, filled with gravel and probably ice* in winter - all when there's a perfectly good main road that goes the same way.  Cars really aren't that scary, you know.

*Bitter, moi?

[Alouicious]

Single track lanes that pass by dairy farms don't make me dislike Audax. I hate lanes, full stop.

In a weird way, this makes my enjoyment of Audax greater, cus I am taking a route different from the routesheet and "Will I arrive at the next control ahead or behind?"

[Martin]

Unsold "Kraftwerk Autobahn" era distance medals

[Needham-matt]

That 'nice man' who wont drop you however slow you go because he 'chivalrously' doesn't like leaving a female to ride alone.

He is the most tedious company in the world.

(Blokes reading this who have ridden with me: Don't be daft, of course I don't mean you)

you're so nasty...I'm not that tedious.

[marcusjb]

Love lanes - one of the reasons I enjoy audax - okay some are a bit too lanesy when they might have had tarmac on them once, but they are now glorified bridleways (Kennet Valley Run had some interesting parts like this recently).

The bit I don't like?  The 3.5 seconds (approx.) in winter when it turns from daytime to nighttime and changes from 3 or 4 degrees above zero to 5 or 6 below soooooo quickly.  And, being winter, you've probably got to deal with that for the next 3-4 hours......

[Panoramix]

Audax routed on busy A roads

[sub55]

Cafes that only serve instant coffee. I mean, not even a filter pot. That gets me down more than anything else

Noooooooooo,    although i would generally not argue with your extensive knowledge , GrahamG  ON  this issue ive got too raise an eyebrow.   I want a large mug of strong intant coffee with just enough milk in it  to make it cool enough to drink.   so that i can be on my way.  
None of this fancy modernistic crap for me.  They spend 20 mins crushing the beans for you and running it all through a complicated machine , to justify charging you an extorsionate amount of money for something that s not as good anyway.  The only possible exception to this ,is mcdonalds coffee.   Its surpriseingly good.

[marcusjb]

The only possible exception to this ,is mcdonalds coffee.   Its surpriseingly good.

This is in fact completely true.  My girlfriend was told to give it a go by the CFO of a fairly sizable chain of coffee shops, as he was both impressed and concerned by it.

[Alouicious]

Cafes that only serve instant coffee. I mean, not even a filter pot. That gets me down more than anything else

Noooooooooo,    although i would generally not argue with your extensive knowledge , GrahamG  ON  this issue ive got too raise an eyebrow.   I want a large mug of strong intant coffee with just enough milk in it  to make it cool enough to drink.   so that i can be on my way.  
None of this fancy modernistic crap for me.  They spend 20 mins crushing the beans for you and running it all through a complicated machine , to justify charging you an extorsionate amount of money for something that s not as good anyway.  The only possible exception to this ,is mcdonalds coffee.   Its surpriseingly good.

Its 100% Arabica, that's why. 

[marcusjb]

Audax routed on busy A roads

Funny how some people say they hate lanes, and some say they hate A Roads!  Can't please everyone!

I'm with you - in general, I am far happier in lanes.  I ride on main roads in busy London most days - so lanes are a real escape for me.

[Simonb]

Needing a poo.

[AndyH]

Needing a poo.

Given the line under your avatar, I thought that needing a poo might be the highlight of an Audax for you