The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.

[Andrij]

My 'favourite' is those people you often find queuing to use the wide gates, but with no apparent need to use them.  In the mean time, regular gates are empty and people with luggage, prams, bicycles, etc are delayed even longer.

[Mr Larrington]

Oh BUGGER. Bike scheme at work, 2013 - max £2,000 (don't need n+1 here) 2014 - max £3,000 (still don't need one). 2015? Fratello disc on the shopping list. Max value? £1,000 

'Tis a wondrous device cunningly molished by the Natives of the East from the liver of the elephant.

You can keep fags in it.

[Torslanda]

Actually, I've got an 8-incher sitting on my shelf here, sandwiched between two books.

What's a 'book'? 

[Mr Larrington]

See above...

My right elbow is not working properly.  I blame Clarion and his TPoC

[Zipperhead]

Oh BUGGER. Bike scheme at work, 2013 - max £2,000 (don't need n+1 here) 2014 - max £3,000 (still don't need one). 2015? Fratello disc on the shopping list. Max value? £1,000 

What is this need concept of which you speak?

[Mr Larrington]

Knocking the HDMI cable out of the back of the AV wossname is probably ow I've got my hair trapped under my shoulder the reason why fuck the corner of that shelf is sharp the Babbage-Engine is not sending output to the bollocks I've dropped the thing deep into the EU Anbaric Spaghetti Mountain distascope.

Also, would it be too much to ask, Windows, that if the AV wossname is present and correct at the end of the string you default to using it for audio output and only use the internal squeakers as a last resort instead of making me faff around in Control Panel every time I switch the thing on?

It would, you say?  Sorry to have troubled you.

[hellymedic]

Oyster gates automagically turn to RED as soon as there is any pressure on the metalwork on the floor of the gate.

This is great fun when partner has to juggle luggage, hefty Helly on wheelchair, his PAYG Oyster and my Freedom Pass.

He has long arms but is no Marsh Gibbon.

[Canardly]

Recruitment offices for social workers, teachers and other relevant public sector workers, are going to be full to the brim now that said personnel can also go to prison for five years for bureaucratic cop outs cock ups. After all, these amazingly well paid, fully resourced, non stressful and fulfilling jobs are highly valued in the UK. Strewth. Course there is always banking, that doesn't seem to carry a prison sentence under any circumstances.

[David Martin]

Seriously, this is a training vid for a 'technical' product. If the audience needs telling that you click on the floppy icon to save, they should be shot before being allowed near a keyboard.

Please, Grandpa, what's a floppy?

It's a 3.5" wide model of a save icon.

[andrewc]

Recruitment offices for social workers, teachers and other relevant public sector workers, are going to be full to the brim now that said personnel can also go to prison for five years for bureaucratic cop outs cock ups. After all, these amazingly well paid, fully resourced, non stressful and fulfilling jobs are highly valued in the UK. Strewth. Course there is always banking, that doesn't seem to carry a prison sentence under any circumstances.

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/mar/03/david-cameron-child-abuse-ignore-jail

Does that also apply to MP's who cover up for a mate, or party whips who keep the info in a little black book to keep the chaps in line ?

[clarion]

See above...

My right elbow is not working properly.  I blame Clarion and his TPoC

Yeah, sorry 'bout that.

[fuzzy]

I 'kin hate football

Last night was cold and miserable and my lurgy is causing snot and koff this morning.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Seriously, this is a training vid for a 'technical' product. If the audience needs telling that you click on the floppy icon to save, they should be shot before being allowed near a keyboard.

Please, Grandpa, what's a floppy?

It's a 3.5" wide model of a save icon.

It's a skeuomorph.

[T42]

Oyster gates automagically turn to RED as soon as there is any pressure on the metalwork on the floor of the gate.

Visions of a queue of David Kossof lookalikes going "Oy, oy..." at having to wait.

[Mr Larrington]

You know when the phone and doorbell ring at almost, but not quite, exactly the same time and you need both hands to open the front door while still grasping the phone to your ear'ole and then have to sign for the delivery?

Like that, but with two front doors

[Andrij]

You know when the phone and doorbell ring at almost, but not quite, exactly the same time and you need both hands to open the front door while still grasping the phone to your ear'ole and then have to sign for the delivery?

Like that, but with two front doors

Serves you right for giving household staff a day off during the week.  With it being a nice day, I assume the gardener is too busy to pull double duty.

[T42]

Missus cooked mushrooms in with the leeks. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHpuke.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Dropbox. Is it the world's slowest ftp?

[Cudzoziemiec]

No, it's not really an ftp, is it. At least, it's not doing what I hoped/expected it would do.

[rafletcher]

wetransfer FTW

[mrcharly-YHT]

No, it's not really an ftp, is it. At least, it's not doing what I hoped/expected it would do.

What did you expect it to do?

It is software that mirrors a designated drive area into the cloud. More akin to decent backup software than anything else. I think it is fab and wish more people would use it or something similar.

[Jurek]

^^
The only problem with Wetransfer is the short lifespan of uploads.

[Mr Larrington]

You know when the phone and doorbell ring at almost, but not quite, exactly the same time and you need both hands to open the front door while still grasping the phone to your ear'ole and then have to sign for the delivery?

Like that, but with two front doors

Serves you right for giving household staff a day off during the week.  With it being a nice day, I assume the gardener is too busy to pull double duty.

I fired him for buying a Maserati.  A Jaguar would have been fine.

[Cudzoziemiec]

I thought it was going to upload my files somewhere and give me a link to mail to someone who could then download them. But it didn't. It just - slowly - attached them to my email. Somehow this was possible, although I was only using it because they were too big to send as an attachment, which had prompted a message suggesting I use Dropbox. I didn't want to zip them because I suspect they're going to zipped and unzipped millions of times and they're only just legible as it is - very spidery handwriting.

[Mr Larrington]

No, it's not really an ftp, is it. At least, it's not doing what I hoped/expected it would do.

What did you expect it to do?

It is software that mirrors a designated drive area into the cloud. More akin to decent backup software than anything else. I think it is fab and wish more people would use it or something similar.

Dr Larrington sent me a link for a ~80kb Word file in Dropbox the other day.  It would have been quicker as an e-mail attachment, even if you exclude the three attempts required to get my Dropbox password right.

At the tail end of last year I had cause to download an 80 Mb file from wetransfer.  Note to sender: I only needed to poofrede the text so embedding a shedload of high-resolution photos in a Word document was both wrong and mad.