What's the baddest thing you did when you were little?

[BrianI]

when I was young I was quite naughty and mother  said I would end up going to the bad boys home and end up being a street sweeper when I grew up........
I also remember flooding the boys "portaloo" toilets at primary school.  Stuffing the toilet bowls full of that shiny school bum paper, then flushing, and rapidly vacating when the water started lapping around my feet!   

Family rumour also has it that I peed on the Minister while getting Christened as a little boy... 


hmmm, oh, I also remember managing to feign an illness at primary school so I could get home early to play "Feud" on the ZX Spectum which I had only got delivered the previous day!   

[essexian]

When I was about 7 or 8, my brother and I broke into the wood yard which used to be at the end of our street (its now flats of course!). When I say broke in, I actually mean got through a small hole in the fence.

Being kids, we just had an explore…. Until a 12 foot tall police officer dragged us home by the ear and explained to our Mum what we had been up to. One smacking later (and no tea!!!), we never did that again. Come comes Police Officers aren’t 12 foot tall anymore???

Oh and I also broke my Nan’s little finger and got told off by the headmaster for steeling milk bottles from outside a house (I blame the Milk Marketing Board). Oh, there was also the time when I got warned for receiving stolen goods (how did I know you couldn’t buy a motor bike for £5 from a kid down the youth centre).

[Charlotte]

I shot my sister in the head.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we could be about to declare a winner, if winner is the correct term here,

I dunno, I reckon boab's a smidgen in the lead right now 

In my defence, I was eight and it was an unloaded, pop-out GAT pistol which I shouldn't have been left with unsupervised.  My little sister still has the scar on her temple... 

[Adrian]

I shot my sister in the head.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we could be about to declare a winner, if winner is the correct term here,

I dunno, I reckon boab's a smidgen in the lead right now 

In my defence, I was eight and it was an unloaded, pop-out GAT pistol which I shouldn't have been left with unsupervised.  My little sister still has the scar on her temple... 

Well, seeing as your sister didn't actually die, I guess so.

[bikepacker]

Just after the WW2 I found a German Luger pistol on Bentley Common. Played with it and fired it at a cat, must of missed by miles but don't know where the bullet ended up. I was five and local policeman Sergeant Mountford frogmarched me home for a telling off.  

[Biggsy]

Hurling a pointed stick at my brother's leg, which embedded quite nicely.

Or putting coins on a railway rail to get flattened.

[L CC]

I shot my sister in the head.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we could be about to declare a winner, if winner is the correct term here,

I dunno, I reckon boab's a smidgen in the lead right now 

In my defence, I was eight and it was an unloaded, pop-out GAT pistol which I shouldn't have been left with unsupervised.  My little sister still has the scar on her temple... 

Well, seeing as your sister didn't actually die, I guess so.

Neither did mine!

[jogler]

The thing that caused the most distress to my parents...
At the age of 7, my friend & I rode our bikes from Blurton to Crewe.It's only approx 20 miles but it seemed a big deal at the time.We buggered off immediatley after breakfast without telling our parents('cause they would of course have prevented the ride happening) & had a marvellous adventure all day long
We got home just as darkness fell.It was mid June-ish so we'd been "missing" for nearly 14 hours & our parents were frantic.The neighbours were out searching the local fields & woods:there were police officers,including a WPC: in the house to search the place & question & comfort my parents.The local hospitals had been contacted to enquire about juvenille A&E admissions.Derelict buildings were being searched at the nearby pit.Oh what a drama
No tea,slapped arse & legs,bike locked away,grounded for 50 years,no pocket money till I reached 65 etc etc.
The following weekend we burgled our bikes from the garden sheds & buggered off to Trentham having left a note to explain where we had gone(we said Barlaston Downs but that was a lie red herring) & that we'd be back for tea time

[L CC]

O god, I've just remembered scaring the bejeesus out of my parents by climbing out of the window and going on a bender.
I wasn't that little though, I was 15. I reckoned it would be obvious that I'd gone to Kate's party (the one I'd been grounded to avoid me going to) and of course I wasn't going to come home till late afternoon the next day after that. I mean, I was hung over and so not really in much condition for a telling off until about 7pm.
I'd been gone for 24 hours, they'd phoned the police, the hospitals, sheesh.

<selfish teenager> over-reaction or what</selfish teenager>

[mike]

it's all part of lifes rich tapestry, isnt it? 

putting my [twin] sister in hospital with a fractured skull (aged , running away from home (10), writing off the family car (12), being taken to the police station and given a bollocking for waving a shotgun at cars (14), suspended for being drunk in morning assembly (16) then expelled (17). 

how we laughed.

[L CC]

What did you get expelled for?
(me=bad attitude and telling physics teacher "no I haven't done the homework, it was just fucking tedious, sorry")

Not little so doesn't count 

[mrcharly-YHT]

Baddest? Criminy, I dunno.

Punching holes in the classroom walls?
Seeing how fast my parent's V8 could go (answer, not that fast, I only got up to 180kph before black smoke started coming out from under the bonnet).

[mike]

What did you get expelled for?

a 'satirical magazine' was published, mainly photos from porn mags with teachers heads cut& pasted onto them (using pritt-stick, none of this control c / control v nonsense ) then I was captain of the beige team in the rather spectacular foodfight that followed the inevitable bollocking and empty threats of expelling all involved 'when we find out who you are'.   

aiming half a pork pie at the girls boarding house probably didnt help my case - even though I missed.   

It was a week before my A levels, my parents were *so* proud.

[L CC]

It was a week before my A levels

Quality

[CrinklyLion]

I was, naturally, very very good 

(Dunno, you'd probably have to ask my mum!)

[David Martin]

Not really sure what I should admit to here..

I did get a telling off for climbing on the school roof - at primary and at secondary.

Chemistry degree in the days when even doing O'level included Real Chemicals (tm)  - need I say more?

My best mate at the time set the scout hut on fire..

[Wowbagger]

The building in which I was educated between 1962 and 1963 was a purpose built school, but no-one ever thought that sanitation was necessary for such buildings. There were quite horrible bucket bogs, which were emptied occasionally, the buckets being removed for emptying by undoing a small door at the back and withdrawing the bucket. It was a simple matter, when you knew that someone was sitting on the bog, to get a handful of nettles and give them an unpleasant surprise.

Also, the outbuilding was so dilapidated that the pointing on the bog wall had disintegrated and we would queue up to piss through the small hole that had appeared. This resulted in a splendid cascade of urine snaking its way across the playground.

The building is now a private house.

[CAMRAMan]

I somehow managed to capture a wasp in a purse, then let it wander down my sister's neck with the inevitable results!

[numbnuts]

The worse think I did when I was about 5  was to take my uncles watch, only had it for a few hours before being found out and ended up having a very sore bottom afterwards.
Later I did all the normal things like setting fire to the woods and calling the fire brigade nothing like a burn up 

[Quisling]

Oh dear, this thread is bringing back memories of all the stuff I did. One of the least serious of my naughtinesses was to climb a tree though the consequences were not good. Unfortunately it was in a garden I was supposed to be gardening in. I guess I was aged about 11. The boss came home unexpectedly, instantly sacked me and, by association, my brother who wasn't even there at the time.

Oh, I had fun explaining why my brother no longer had a job...

[matthew]

Two incidents spring to mind,

The first I have no memory of, but I am reliably informed that aged ~3 I shared a bottle of cough medicine with my younger sister (15 months). Cue A&E and being dosed with stuff to make us vomit, the nurses then left Mum (heavily pregnant with sister no.2) to look after two very miserable kids.

The second was when I was 12, outside my form room at school was a low wall surrounding a plant bed. Before school one morning Lloyd came up behind me and pushed me over this wall into the prickly shrubs. I stood up straight and turning threw a round house right into his left eye and it went no further. Both of us too shocked at my reaction. Now Lloyds face was a mess from being at the bottom of a pile of bodies on the old tennis courts the day before so there were no marks, and I couldn't punch even if I wanted to. However later in the day another class mate tried to tell my our english teacher what had happened that morning "Mrs Owen, Matthew punched Lloyd this morning" and her responce was "stop telling lies, Matthew wouldn't do a thing like that." I kept very quiet as did Lloyd and we both figured to have got off very lightly.

[clarion]

A number of things I did as a kid I'm not especially proud of, including a fair bit of fighting.

One which got our parents worried but wasn't deliberately bad was a day when I had a deadline to get home, and went off with a bunch of mates to do climbing/digging/making horrendously dangerous swings/treehouses etc.  I did keep checking my watch, but it was only as it got dark that I realised it probably wasn't four o'clock on a late spring afternoon any more. 

Police had been called

Worst injury-related one was an accident with a large knife whereby my good friend Chris Jubb got his finger slashed open to the bone.

Of course, we alerted my parents immedaitely to get him to hospital.

Did we heck!  We wrapped it in a handkerchief, he stuffed his hand in his pocket, and left abruptly to go home...  His mum did find out, unsurprisingly.

Most embarrassing was the failure of an elaborate cherry-knocking plan, which involved tying a fishing line to the next door knocker, and hiding behind the hedge to repeatedly knock.

Unfortunately for me, there was someone in the hall as I tied the line, who saw my outline in the window and opened the door.

I had to go back and apologise.  It wasn't a terribly bad thing to do, but it was deeply embarrassing, and I didn't really speak to those neighbours again.  I was still embarrassed about it when I was in the sixth form with the girl next door about five years later.

[citoyen]

I've done a few bad things I could mention but probably the one I'm most ashamed of is pelting the next door neighbour's pet rabbit with stones in a Lord Of The Flies style moment of madness. I was goaded into doing it by the simple kid from down the road but that's no excuse.

On a lighter note...

I wish I could take the credit for this one, but it was one of my classmates who locked a nun in the stationery cupboard rather than me.

I pissed on my mum.

We all did that.

Speak for yourself. I've never pissed on spindrift's mum.

d.

[clarion]

A couple of teachers at my school did get locked in cupboards.  They were pretty vile, and it was nothing to the treatment they doled out to the unfortunates they 'taught'.  I did not do the locking in.

However, I did precipitate the nervous breakdown of the cruellest teacher in our school.

[L CC]

However, I did precipitate the nervous breakdown of the cruellest teacher in our school.

Hmmm. The teacher I forced to quit wasn't cruel, just incompetant and had poor personal hygiene. I led the classroom revolt which tipped him over the edge.

I'm really quite ashamed of some of the stuff I got up to, mostly because I knew fine well it was bad bad bad, and did it anyway.