Author Topic: Little Eye On The Provinces  (Read 374857 times)

ian

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1575 on: 06 September, 2017, 10:56:43 am »
Once-upon-a-time in those hazy student days, one of our flatmates managed to combine pulling with enhanced inebriation (strangely concordant phenomena back then). But back at her place, amour be damned, he desperately needed a cheeky poo, so made his excuses and staggered to the bathroom, sat down, opened the bomb bay doors, and promptly passed out, in the process tumbling off the loo.

Anyway, there he was on the bathroom floor the next morning, trousers down, arse outwards and still mid-motion. One of her other flatmates walked in on this, erm, spectacle and screamed 'there's a man on the bathroom floor doing a poo.'

You have no idea how much he came to regret sharing this story.

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1576 on: 06 September, 2017, 08:42:25 pm »
Is anyone else wondering, did she use her fingers?
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

ian

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1577 on: 06 September, 2017, 09:29:30 pm »
I dunno, but I wouldn't use my toothbrush again if I were him.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1578 on: 06 September, 2017, 10:09:58 pm »
There are so, so many questions begging about this story...
It is simpler than it looks.

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1579 on: 13 September, 2017, 02:23:41 pm »
http://www.swindonadvertiser.co.uk/news/15529748.Man_stole_8_blocks_of_cheese_before_punching_brave_Co_op_worker/?ref=mrb&lp=10#comments-anchor :smug:

The commentards on the Swindon Advertiser website have an admirably YACF-esque affection for bad puns.  Thank goodness the perp didn't steal fish.
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.


Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1581 on: 14 September, 2017, 08:15:05 pm »

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1582 on: 16 September, 2017, 12:03:30 pm »
Teen climbs highest mountain in wales in his underwear and unsurprisingly gets hypothermic.

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/teen-who-climbed-snowdon-undies-13627677

"Nathan, who is studying sport, nutrition and health at university"  ???

“There is no point in using the word 'impossible' to describe something that has clearly happened.”
― Douglas Adams

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1583 on: 16 September, 2017, 02:52:40 pm »
...learns from practical experience and experiment.

Taught to Question and Challenge All He Reads in Books and Elsewhere...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1584 on: 16 September, 2017, 04:02:35 pm »
Is this stunt man related to Nuncio & Salvatore otp?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-beds-bucks-herts-41268427

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1585 on: 16 September, 2017, 04:12:57 pm »

Redlight

  • Enjoying life in the slow lane
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1586 on: 16 September, 2017, 06:13:58 pm »
Teen climbs highest mountain in wales in his underwear and unsurprisingly gets hypothermic.

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/teen-who-climbed-snowdon-undies-13627677

"Nathan, who is studying sport, nutrition and health at university"  ???

Possible a failed attempt at the Darwin Award?
Why should anybody steal a watch when they can steal a bicycle?

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1587 on: 16 September, 2017, 06:23:45 pm »
Teen climbs highest mountain in wales in his underwear and unsurprisingly gets hypothermic.

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/teen-who-climbed-snowdon-undies-13627677

"Nathan, who is studying sport, nutrition and health at university"  ???

Possible a failed attempt at the Darwin Award?
He raised £950 - but then there had to be an ambulance callout. How much did that cost?

Did the little idiot not think to have friends with hot drinks and warm clothing in case he got cold? It is autumn. What a knob (a cold, shrunken one).
<i>Marmite slave</i>

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1588 on: 16 September, 2017, 06:53:35 pm »
Non-member of Audax 'learn to survive or no brevet' education.

Suspect most of us learn how to dress the hard way, initially in a fairly tame environment. We've probably been cold or soaked and learned a lesson after thinking 'never again'.

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1589 on: 16 September, 2017, 07:07:28 pm »
Suspect most of us learn how to dress the hard way, initially in a fairly tame environment. We've probably been cold or soaked and learned a lesson after thinking 'never again'.

The fable of The Ant And The Man seems relevant here...

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/EPg-v0I1KzU&rel=1" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/EPg-v0I1KzU&rel=1</a>
https://youtu.be/EPg-v0I1KzU

Redlight

  • Enjoying life in the slow lane
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1590 on: 20 September, 2017, 08:12:49 pm »
Why should anybody steal a watch when they can steal a bicycle?

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1591 on: 20 September, 2017, 10:38:06 pm »

Redlight

  • Enjoying life in the slow lane
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1592 on: 21 September, 2017, 02:26:10 pm »
Within a mile of my abode
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-41334906
 :(

Looks like the next series of The Apprentice is being made on a lower budget than previous ones.
Why should anybody steal a watch when they can steal a bicycle?

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1593 on: 24 September, 2017, 06:36:38 am »
http://www.bucksfreepress.co.uk/news/15552595.PROPERTY_NEWS__Parents_pay_highest_premium_to_leave_near_top_school/

"Parents pay highest premium to leave near top Beaconsfield school, Beaconsfield High"

Spell check wins again.

I think that we have better editing on YACF! 

And then not news, anyway.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1594 on: 26 September, 2017, 01:37:39 pm »
It's the wrong Birmingham, Grommit!
Quote
"Birmingham was the coolest place I've been to in the UK yet," he said. "It was really fabulous.

"The people are great, the town's awesome, the guys that did the ride were really tremendous. It was a brilliant event.
I dread to think what Birmingham, Alabama is like if it's West Midlands namesake looks so great to him.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1595 on: 26 September, 2017, 01:43:26 pm »
Wrong Birmingham issues occur surprisingly regularly.  Bonus points to a certain university for embedding google search boxes on their site without restricting the search to the relevant domain.

If he's been to the UK, but not Edinburgh or London, and Birmingham's the coolest place yet, he's presumably been to Swindon or something.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1596 on: 26 September, 2017, 02:37:13 pm »
Or Didcot!  :D

Or maybe his impressions of the UK were formed through a forum just like this one...  :o
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

ElyDave

  • Royal and Ancient Polar Bear Society member 263583
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1598 on: 27 September, 2017, 10:40:55 pm »
I have heard tales of USAnian winter olympic fans heading to Albertville Alabama inspead of Albertville France.

It NEVER snows in Albertville Alabama
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1599 on: 28 September, 2017, 12:42:05 am »
It doesn't have to. It is white enough already.
It is simpler than it looks.