Festive rhymes

[Blodwyn Pig]

Buttercream,Buttercream, bakers cat,
ate all the cream, and got way too fat,
he couldn't get up on Christmas day,
his carcass was found,  out in the hay.

 

[hellymedic]

Stolen from Twitter, political.

(click to show/hide)

O little town of Brexitland
How still your leaders lie
Their pockets deep whilst homeless sleep
Beneath a darkening sky
Yet in these dark days smelleth
The everlasting shite
No hopes just fears for many years
Let’s not give up the fight

[Ian H]

Here I sit, alone and sixty,
Bald and fat and full of sin.
Cold the seat and loud the cistern
As I read the Harpic tin.





[Last verse of a Betjeman parody by Alan Bennett]

[Torslanda]

 

We three kings of Stevenson Square*
Selling knickers, tuppence a pair
Quite fantastic no elastic
Not very safe to wear

Trad: Arr anon

*Manchester for the uninitiated - Uncertain whether there ever was a market there

[Wowbagger]

Christmas is going
The geese are getting sparse
Please stick a pitchfork... etc.

[hellymedic]

We three kings of Stevenson Square*
Selling knickers, tuppence a pair
Quite fantastic no elastic
Not very safe to wear

Trad: Arr anon

*Manchester for the uninitiated - Uncertain whether there ever was a market there

We three kings of Leicester Square
Selling ladies' underwear
So fantastic, no elastic
Only a penny a pair

was my junior school version.

[Torslanda]

Inflation and a lack of decorum.

[Torslanda]

Good King Wenceslas looked out
Of his bedroom window
Silly bugger he fell out
On a red hot cinder
Brightly shone his bum that night
Tho' the frost was croo-elll
When a poor man came in sight
Wenceslas you foo-ooo-elll

[Mr Larrington]

Someone on Farcebok noted that Sabbath's "War Pigs" can be sung to the tune of "Deck The Halls" and vice-versa.

Generals gathered in their masses
Fa la la la la la la la la¹
Just like witches at black masses²
Etc

1: Number of "la"s not checked for accuracy
2: Some inspired rhyming there, Geezer

[Torslanda]

From Wikipedia/Saturday Night Live

"In the meadow we can build a snowman
One with Gary Gilmore packed inside
We'll ask him, 'Are you dead yet?' He'll say, 'No, man'
But we'll wait out the frostbite till he dies."