Grammar that makes you cringe

[Mr Larrington]

“Super” – meaning “very” – appears to have infected the world of tennis.

[Pickled Onion]

Agreed. As any fule kno, "super" means "very very very" like "tremendously" means "very very very very very".

[Pingu]

“Super” – meaning “very” – appears to have infected the world of tennis.

Won't be long before they'll be going full gas, for sure.

[Mr Larrington]

“Super” – meaning “very” – appears to have infected the world of tennis.

Won't be long before they'll be going full gas, for sure.

Though they don’t actually go anywhere, so there isn’t a long way to go.  Still, anything can happen.  We will see.

[Pingu]

“Super” – meaning “very” – appears to have infected the world of tennis.

Won't be long before they'll be going full gas, for sure.

Though they don’t actually go anywhere, so there isn’t a long way to go.  Still, anything can happen.  We will see.

Yeh.

[Pingu]

...An anonymised witness...

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2023/jul/26/uk-inaction-let-wagner-group-flourish-and-grow-say-mps

[Cudzoziemiec]

Not sure there's anything wrong in that. They might not have been anonymous at the time of giving evidence but have had identifying details removed for the purpose of the report.

[Nuncio]

When I was a comparatively old man in a primarily young team, about 12 years ago, I used to keep a secret list of things that my colleagues had described as 'awesome', most of which I would have thought of as barely 'good' let alone awe-inspiring (though there was a fair bit of obviously ironic use as well). I don't think I've heard it for a while now but am no longer in that setting. Has it gone completely?

Also, 'absolutely' for 'yes' or 'certainly' or 'that's true' or 'I agree' does not seem to be as prevalent as back then; though '100%' seems to have replaced it. Anyone else noticed lots of '100%s'?

[Pickled Onion]

Apparently Unilever is a Consumer Group:

The consumer group Unilever, which owns brands including Cornetto ice-cream and Dove soap

Are you sure, the Guardian?

consumer group
noun
an organization that works to protect the rights and interests of people who buy things or use services, especially by making sure that businesses act fairly, that products are safe, and that advertising is honest

[Kim]

When I was a comparatively old man in a primarily young team, about 12 years ago, I used to keep a secret list of things that my colleagues had described as 'awesome', most of which I would have thought of as barely 'good' let alone awe-inspiring (though there was a fair bit of obviously ironic use as well). I don't think I've heard it for a while now but am no longer in that setting. Has it gone completely?

I believe 'awesome' was replaced by the short-lived 'mega' in about 1991.

The current term appears to be 'sick' or possibly 'dank' (with the disclaimer I'm far too old to get this right).

I reckon 'cool' is old enough to be universal, though I recall an ancient maths teacher being bemused by it when I was at secondary school.  I can only assume he was so engrossed in differential equations or something that he completely missed the 50s.

Anyone else noticed lots of '100%s'?

This one's so prevalent it's got its own de-facto unicode code point (U+1F4AF for those playing along at home):  💯

[T42]

When I was a comparatively old man in a primarily young team, about 12 years ago, I used to keep a secret list of things that my colleagues had described as 'awesome', most of which I would have thought of as barely 'good' let alone awe-inspiring (though there was a fair bit of obviously ironic use as well). I don't think I've heard it for a while now but am no longer in that setting. Has it gone completely?

I believe 'awesome' was replaced by the short-lived 'mega' in about 1991.

The current term appears to be 'sick' or possibly 'dank' (with the disclaimer I'm far too old to get this right).

'Insane' seems to be the favourite awesome-equivalent on YouTube at present. Back in the 80s it was aMAY-zing.  I gather that it means "not bad".

Another idiotic meme (is it a meme as Dorkins defined them?) in YT titles is "...you never heard of", e.g.  "Insane XYZ you never heard of", where XYZ is anything from quantum physics to bog roll.  Insults you even before you've clicked on the damned thing.

[Cudzoziemiec]

The phrase that I don't like is "Here's how" or "We show you how". As in, "Want to build your own hadron collider? We show you how" or "Are you using the right bog roll? Here's how to tell."

[T42]

"Are you using the right bog roll? Here's how to tell."

Funny, that. Just now I was over in the workshop, putting a rear-view mirror on the beater.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Not an error, but it made me laugh: a sign outside a shop, advertising "pre-loved kids' clothes". Suitable for believers in reincarnation?

[rafletcher]

“Someone is using my department to circumnavigate due process”. Whatever happened to proof readers - I’d certainly have used “circumvent”.

[Mr Larrington]

“Once fully charged, all lights [on a cordless screwdriver] will distinguish”.

[Kim]

non life-threatening electrocution injuries

[Cudzoziemiec]

Articles go in the article, not in the headline!

[Cudzoziemiec]

I couldn't find a Vocabular That Makes You (not) Cringe thread, so this one will do.

The sounds of American suburbia now featuring the falling kleen canteen/hydroflask 1L as it pachinkos down from the top row of aluminum bleachers.

Pachinko, as you probably know, is a sort of Japanese pinball machine in which metal balls bounce around a vertical pattern of bumpers, tracks and so on. So to use pachinko as a verb suggesting something falling, bouncing down steps as it does, and making a lot of metallic noise in the process, is a brilliant use of the word. That it includes the English word 'chink', descriptive of a metallic noise, is an additional happiness.

[T42]

Oi, Graun!  Maroon does not mean wreck or run aground. See Treasure Island, Ben Gunn.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Do you remember Rolodex? Apparently the item is still in manufacture but the name is rarely used, I think, to refer to the actual object, nowadays. Which might explain why I've just heard someone say "My new boss is very disappointing in terms of client relationships; she brought very, very little in terms of a client Rolodeck."

[Pingu]

Hampshire villagers bring street’s apostrophe catastrophe to a full stop

[Cudzoziemiec]

Hampshire villagers bring street’s apostrophe catastrophe to a full stop

He set out the position thus: “Clear and unambiguous street and place names are vital for postal and other delivery services and also for the emergency services, and punctuation can make that more difficult, particularly with modern computer systems.”

True. But meh. Is any 999 driver or postie going to ignore St Marys Terrace because they're looking for St Mary's Terrace, or vice versa? I think not. I'm sure that county councils have enough real needs to spend their insufficient funds on without dealing with grumpy grammarians.

[Kim]

Hampshire villagers bring street’s apostrophe catastrophe to a full stop

He set out the position thus: “Clear and unambiguous street and place names are vital for postal and other delivery services and also for the emergency services, and punctuation can make that more difficult, particularly with modern computer systems.”

True. But meh. Is any 999 driver or postie going to ignore St Marys Terrace because they're looking for St Mary's Terrace, or vice versa? I think not. I'm sure that county councils have enough real needs to spend their insufficient funds on without dealing with grumpy grammarians.

Delivery people don't use street names, as evidenced by all the post we get for Perpendicular Road and Other Side Of The Block Road.

It's going to be crap database software that'll have an issue.  Which means the $FrenchCar satnav will deny that the road exists, the council will refuse your pothole reports and you'll end up thousands of pounds in arrears because $EnergyCo can't find your meter.  None of which will be remotely improved by what's written on the road sign.  At least until the self-driving cars come along.  Assuming they can get past that tricky left turn on '); DROP TABLE Destinations;-- Avenue.

Anyway, there's a tried and tested solution to gramatical errors on road signs: Petty vandalism.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Perpendicular Road has to be a real name somewhere. We have a Circular Road in Bristol (which no one lives on) but if you google "perpendicular road bristol" it gives you this.