I have just dug out a pannier that hasn't been used for a few months.
I then removed the banana lying at the bottom of said pannier.
Some time ago I wondered what the funny smell coming from my wardrobe was.
Repeated investigations including removing everything and lots of cleaning didn't reveal anything.
The culprit turned out to be a banana in the top compartment of my rucsac.
It was probably 6 months old.
Much, much worse was the dead snail under the spare wheel in my ex-wife's car
Try a two week-old dead skunk in your car a/c. That's what happened to a friend of mine. He came back from some travels, started the car, and well. Anyway, it was a write-off. Some smells don't leave of any accord.
On other matters. I have no interest in sports. I've given up feigning an interest. Especially if it's football. I truly, truly don't care about football. I make this quite clear whenever someone – virtually always a taxi driver – mentions the topic. It never stops them. "No, I don't follow football," say I. "What about them Arsenals," says they. What about me not caring? For heaven's sake, I can get in a cab anywhere from Nigeria to New York and end up with Manchester United fan in the driving seat. And they just go on. And on. There used to be a time when it was a safe bet that women wouldn't talk about football. But not now, oh no, they're in on it.
For this very reason, I've invented the best sport ever, namely Trifle Diving. It has rules and everything. Any time I'm stuck in a back-seat football conversation now, I introduce Trifle Diving. See, I'm just back from a meeting of the World Trifle Diving Association. We were meeting to prepare our submission for inclusion in the Olympics. Or I'm back from 4th World Trifle Diving Competition. Or I got gold in the inaugural tournament, but now I coach Team GB. Yes, under Italian rules there is a tiramisu round. Trust me, I've had the opportunity to really think this out in some advanced detail. Given enough time, I can get the driver to seriously ask "what kind of jelly? Strawberry?" Of course!
A good Trifle Dive, btw, is called 'touching sponge'. The Canadian team currently hold the world title.