The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.

[SoreTween]

Also cancelled is our Bristol to Paddington train.

Since I'm here, 45 minutes tapping a screen to book tickets to the comedy store hasn't improved my mood any. I tried the phone number instead but naturally there's no answer.

[T42]

Did our tax return last week & just checked it again.  After Macron's great reform where "some people will see their taxes reduced and some won't pay any", the amount we'll be paying next year has damn near doubled. Underhand bastard.

[spesh]

Did our tax return last week & just checked it again.  After Macron's great reform where "some people will see their taxes reduced and some won't pay any", the amount we'll be paying next year has damn near doubled. Underhand bastard.

Comment dites-vous "read my lips - no new taxes" en français?   

[T42]

More or less as you'd expect.  Thing is, he's not applying new taxes; he's revamping the collection system and fiddling revising the existing tax tables at the same time.

It's particularly annoying that his bunch are the only ones you can vote for without letting in the populist crooks.

[hellymedic]

Postie bundled mail for four adjacent addresses though our mail box, rang the door bell and scarpered, waking partner, who now has to deliver misposted mail.

He has a headache from being woken and wants to disconnect doorbell, which terrifies me.

[ian]

Our doorbell died some time back and I never got around to replacing it.

I can't say I miss it. There's a sign on the door with instructions for deliveries (put them in the waterproof box behind the porch, an entire 2 metres away) that the courier can summarily ignore and leave the package on a doorstep all day instead.

If someone has been invited, they'll usually know to stand outside and shout or they'll phone. Not answering the door is liberating.

[Tim Hall]

I'm not sure if my doorbell works.  When I moved in, about a year ago, the bell push was present and correct. The wireless bell part was not, presumably tidied up and packed away by the previous owner.  If so it now resides on the other side of town, out of range.

[Kim]

Doorbells that don't work are a work of Stan.  They operantly condition Stupid Hearing People to bang on doors instead of using the perfectly good doorbell.  If you don't want a bell, or it's b0rked, remove the button or stick some tape over it or something.

The rot set in when the things became  a) battery operated  and  b) wireless.  There's no way something like that is going to work for more than a year or two without regular attention.  Proper bells, driven by 6VAC from a transformer (so you don't get almost-but-not-quite-entirely-flat batteries or electrolytic corrosion in the bell push), were both unambiguous and reliable.  Obviously the latest trend is to internet-of-shit the things, so there can be even more ways for them not to work.

[ian]

Our wireless one only worked sometimes, which isn't terribly useful. I unplugged it and put it in the garage where it, at least, is guaranteed not to work.

Frankly, I'd rather not be disturbed, it's not like people turn up on spec unless they're trying to sell me something, are religious loons of assorted flavours, political types who somehow get past the bears, or a delivery (in which case they're in the van and sailing off down the street in the 5 seconds it would take me to answer the door).

In theory I could activate the security cameras on the drive and porch and that would ping me when someone approaches, in practice I can't be arsed unless I am specifically expecting something or it's one of those days I anticipate a Viking raiding party.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Our doorbell hasn't worked since an unknown time before we lived here. Tried changing the battery and it then works once or twice. I think the striker doesn't return properly. But the postman knows it doesn't work and so does everyone else who comes here.

[Mr Larrington]

Stomach!  I don't know what I put in you yesterday that led to the rumblings abdominal (simply phenomenal at that) and generally anti-social behaviour but it isn't there now so kindly start working normally 

[Jurek]

Our doorbell died some time back and I never got around to replacing it.

I can't say I miss it. There's a sign on the door with instructions for deliveries (put them in the waterproof box behind the porch, an entire 2 metres away) that the courier can summarily ignore and leave the package on a doorstep all day instead.

If someone has been invited, they'll usually know to stand outside and shout or they'll phone. Not answering the door is liberating.

I've not responded to the doorbell ringing since 2013*.
In fact, I really ought to terminate the electricity supply to the device.
If you've not made an arrangement to call, then don't bother...


*Some poor bastard is still out there pressing the button, six years later.

[Deano]

Our doorbell hasn't worked since an unknown time before we lived here. Tried changing the battery and it then works once or twice. I think the striker doesn't return properly. But the postman knows it doesn't work and so does everyone else who comes here.

But how do you know no one else comes if you can't hear the doorbell?

[Cudzoziemiec]

Our doorbell hasn't worked since an unknown time before we lived here. Tried changing the battery and it then works once or twice. I think the striker doesn't return properly. But the postman knows it doesn't work and so does everyone else who comes here.

But how do you know no one else comes if you can't hear the doorbell?

That's easy, they never get near the house; we find them on the electric fence.
(Serious answer: the layout means 1) we can hear people's footsteps on the path, 2) they're visible from most of the windows 3) they bang on the door.)

[Tim Hall]

Our doorbell hasn't worked since an unknown time before we lived here. Tried changing the battery and it then works once or twice. I think the striker doesn't return properly. But the postman knows it doesn't work and so does everyone else who comes here.

But how do you know no one else comes if you can't hear the doorbell?

Take the AA Milne approach:

PLES RING IF AN RNSER IS REQIRD
and underneath the bell-pull is a notice that says:

PLEZ CNOKE IF AN RNSR IS NOT REQID.

[ElyDave]

our doorbell works perfectly, the deliverly twunts don't. they tap pathetically on the door and look offended if you don't hear immediately.

More grumble-worthy is the fact that because we have a nice slate plaque with our house number and street name, we seem to be the local delivery redirect service. NO we are not [any address with our road name] - Read the fucking package!

[Giraffe]

Recently bough a wireless one - the push is rated IP67 and is kinetic so it sends a signal upon releasing the lever (whole front is hinged at the top and sprung).
There are 2 sounders that plug into the mains and take very little current. I have them where I can hear them anywhere in the house.
They're not audible from outside and I prefer that. Scrotes could ring several times, no answer, break in. There's also the logic that I have them where I can hear them.

[andytheflyer]

Doorbells that don't work are a work of Stan.  They operantly condition Stupid Hearing People to bang on doors instead of using the perfectly good doorbell.  If you don't want a bell, or it's b0rked, remove the button or stick some tape over it or something.

The rot set in when the things became  a) battery operated  and  b) wireless.  There's no way something like that is going to work for more than a year or two without regular attention.  Proper bells, driven by 6VAC from a transformer (so you don't get almost-but-not-quite-entirely-flat batteries or electrolytic corrosion in the bell push), were both unambiguous and reliable.  Obviously the latest trend is to internet-of-shit the things, so there can be even more ways for them not to work.

Didn't think it worthy of a grumble (but should have) when our last battery doorbell died, for no apparent reason, voles and vole wires all being present and correct, I was so pissed off that I went for one of these:

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Wind-Up-Mechanical-Doorbell-Round-Brass-Push-Model-850R/172522908526?_trkparms=aid%3D555018%26algo%3DPL.SIM%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20140122125356%26meid%3Dff39c118b753418bb40254bdd3955146%26pid%3D100005%26rk%3D1%26rkt%3D12%26mehot%3Dag%26sd%3D173460483244%26itm%3D172522908526&_trksid=p2047675.c100005.m1851

Apart from the fact that the first one bust, and the supplier replaced it FoC, it's brilliant.  It rattles your teeth even if you are the oher side of the house, and only needs a winding up once in a blue moon.  You'd have to be pushing up daisies not to hear it.  My granny had one IIRC, and the batteries never went flat, or the voles escaped.  As Colin Chapman (was it?) said, "Simplificate and add lightness".  Sometimes modern technology just isn't worth the hassle.

Mind you, still had to put a little brass plaque next to the bell push on the door (saying Door Bell (for the intelligently-challenged and Millenials)) to 'encourage' Postie and the couriers to ring the bloody thing.  But now they are all trained, the system works brilliantly.

[Cudzoziemiec]

We had one just like that ^ on the front door of the house I grew up in. I suspect it might have been as old as the house, which it means it lasted over 100 years to my latest knowledge.

[Feanor]

Owl lived at The Chestnuts, and old-world residence  of
great  charm,  which was grander than anybody else's, or seemed
so to Bear, because it had both a knocker and a bell-pull.
Underneath the knocker there was a notice which said:
       
        PLES RING IF AN RNSER IS REQIRD.
       
Underneath the bell-pull there was a notice which said:
       
        PLEZ CNOKE IF AN RNSR IS NOT REQID.

[PeteB99]

Another one whose doorbell hasn't worked for years. Don't miss it. Door needs replacing though so I might get a Bill Bailey doorbell for the new one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suQbTyxjmXI

[Kim]

our doorbell works perfectly, the deliverly twunts don't. they tap pathetically on the door and look offended if you don't hear immediately.

That's because all the people with broken doorbells have trained them to...

[Kim]

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Wind-Up-Mechanical-Doorbell-Round-Brass-Push-Model-850R/172522908526?_trkparms=aid%3D555018%26algo%3DPL.SIM%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20140122125356%26meid%3Dff39c118b753418bb40254bdd3955146%26pid%3D100005%26rk%3D1%26rkt%3D12%26mehot%3Dag%26sd%3D173460483244%26itm%3D172522908526&_trksid=p2047675.c100005.m1851

Apart from the fact that the first one bust, and the supplier replaced it FoC, it's brilliant.  It rattles your teeth even if you are the oher side of the house, and only needs a winding up once in a blue moon.  You'd have to be pushing up daisies not to hear it.  My granny had one IIRC, and the batteries never went flat, or the voles escaped.  As Colin Chapman (was it?) said, "Simplificate and add lightness".  Sometimes modern technology just isn't worth the hassle.

I like that.  Obviously no good for barakta, who requires modern technology, but can't argue with the principle.

Mind you, still had to put a little brass plaque next to the bell push on the door (saying Door Bell (for the intelligently-challenged and Millenials)) to 'encourage' Postie and the couriers to ring the bloody thing.  But now they are all trained, the system works brilliantly.

We once got a telling-off from the police (after a burglary) for having a "Please use the doorbell -->" sign on our door.  Apparently that encourages burglars, by implying that you're old and burglable.

They're not audible from outside and I prefer that. Scrotes could ring several times, no answer, break in. There's also the logic that I have them where I can hear them.

Not sure I follow the logic here.  Scrote rings doorbell.  Either:  a) A person appears, scrote makes random excuse, moves on.   
 or   b) Nobody appears, scrote burgles at leisure.  I don't see where obfuscating the functionality of the doorbell comes into that - people might be in or out, regardless of how loud their doorbell is.

(I think there's also a c) state where the doorbell is accompanied by enthusiastic dog barking, which probably has decent deterrent value even if a person never answers.)

[ian]

Our front door sign says clearly 'the doorbell doesn't work' along with the instructions to put deliveries in the box behind the porch (along with a map for those unable to navigate a rectangular structure).

Yet every time I review the footage from porch-cam there's the delivery driver. He carefully reads the sign. Pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts. Then rings the bell.

Always.

And 50% of the time leaves the parcel on the doormat. The other 50% is our well-trained postie.

[Kim]

Yet every time I review the footage from porch-cam there's the delivery driver. He carefully reads the sign. Pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts. The presses the bell.

Ah, a scientist!