Dry January 2023

[Von Broad]

How are we all doing? Well done if you’re still in. We’re just over 1/4 through.

Yes, I'm in [only just noticed the thread]....and it's a rolling month scenario for me.

[slightly off topic, and a tad self-indulgent, but obviously related...]
There is a part of me, after 63 years of being a pretty hefty boozer to give up for good, and to live the last stage of life alcohol free, but by far the biggest problem I face is a large and significant decrease in often very pleasant, cordial, and relaxing social discourse after work. What with living alone and working largely alone it's important to some some social contact, and I love the bar/pub culture. As for the compulsive, addictive, defensive, avoidant tendencies that accompany my propensity to drink, and the running away from oneself emotionally etc....I can happily confront......I'm ok with a gradual unfolding of all those issues.....but becoming even more reclusive is going present it's own set of problems if I stop entirely. I be fair to myself, I don't exactly drink quite so much these days. There is much less of a need to keep running.
It's a difficult one. At least I've always found it to be.

[SteveC]

MrsC and I are doing a damp January, rather than a dry one.
We have been trying to cut down for ages, particularly when we are in of an evening.
The current scheme is Tanqueray 0.0 gin with tonic. A couple of those is very pleasant of an evening. There isn't the 'one more would be nice' feeling you get with alcohol, so we're getting to bed earlier as well.

Good luck to everyone doing this.

[Basil]

Not finding it difficult at all.  A couple of visits to the pub have been OK. 

Are they supportive of your dryness?

"Supportive" would be too strong a word.
But they remember me doing it last year so they accept it as just something I do.

Them. "Will you make past Burns Night this time?"
Me. Hopefully (Thinks.  No)

[L CC]

3 line whip.

Out tonight. Drinking non-optional.

*sigh*

[chrisbainbridge]

I have gone down with the lurgy.  medicinal alcohol will be drunk tonight. I promise not to enjoy it at all.

[Paul]

almost succumbed just now making a venison bourguignon. Instead I just put the whole half bottle in.

Cooking is one of my danger areas. I would have struggled in that situation. 

[Paul]

How are we all doing? Well done if you’re still in. We’re just over 1/4 through.

Yes, I'm in [only just noticed the thread]....and it's a rolling month scenario for me.

[slightly off topic, and a tad self-indulgent, but obviously related...]
There is a part of me, after 63 years of being a pretty hefty boozer to give up for good, and to live the last stage of life alcohol free, but by far the biggest problem I face is a large and significant decrease in often very pleasant, cordial, and relaxing social discourse after work. What with living alone and working largely alone it's important to some some social contact, and I love the bar/pub culture. As for the compulsive, addictive, defensive, avoidant tendencies that accompany my propensity to drink, and the running away from oneself emotionally etc....I can happily confront......I'm ok with a gradual unfolding of all those issues.....but becoming even more reclusive is going present it's own set of problems if I stop entirely. I be fair to myself, I don't exactly drink quite so much these days. There is much less of a need to keep running.
It's a difficult one. At least I've always found it to be.

I'm not sure this is off topic at all. Booze is deeply ingrained in the lives of many. I completely understand why it would be a problem for you in the way you describe.
I'm thinking about being completely alcohol free. My brother stopped about 10 years ago, and he's a musician living in Spain (two things that seem to encourage drinking).
When I (finally, after many failed attempts) stopped smoking, part of what I had to do was stop identifying as a smoker. That was really hard. I think I would have the same challenge with drinking.
One thing that helped me quit smoking was my kids. I didn't want to die earlier than otherwise necessary. The same might work with drinking if I decide to go down that route.

[Paul]

3 line whip.

Out tonight. Drinking non-optional.

*sigh*

That's really tough.
You can pick it back up tomorrow and stay dry until 2 Feb as far as I'm concerned.

[Paul]

I have gone down with the lurgy.  medicinal alcohol will be drunk tonight. I promise not to enjoy it at all.

Not medical alcohol?
GWS

[SteveC]

3 line whip.

Out tonight. Drinking non-optional.

*sigh*

You could try the trick the Queen used to use with formal meals. If she didn't want to eat, she would just 'play' with the food, cut it up and so on, so it looked as though she was eating.
You could hold the glass and, if offered a refill, point out that you hadn't finished. I managed it once when I gave up for Lent and had a meal at my parents.

Any which way, I hope the event isn't too bad.

[Basil]

Opened a bottle of Old Speckled Hen last night.
Not that bothered.  We'll see what happens.

[Von Broad]

I'm thinking about being completely alcohol free.

Yes, I've been toying with the idea for a long time. Rather like smoking I had so many quits and relapses it was getting ridiculous. Finally, I just said to myself, 'look, either come down on one side of the fence of the other, and stop torturing yourself.....just smoke and be done with it......or stop'. Which is what I eventually did. 22 years ago. One of the best things I ever did. [There haven't been many:-)]
I must say, I never evangelize about stopping smoking, I have friends that smoke, but more and more, I just see the whole thing as utterly absurd. The lungs - the life giving force of the organism and you're putting all this shit down there. Madness. 

My brother stopped about 10 years ago, and he's a musician living in Spain (two things that seem to encourage drinking).
When I (finally, after many failed attempts) stopped smoking, part of what I had to do was stop identifying as a smoker. That was really hard. I think I would have the same challenge with drinking.
One thing that helped me quit smoking was my kids. I didn't want to die earlier than otherwise necessary. The same might work with drinking if I decide to go down that route.

The dynamics are different for us all with these things. I must admit, I don't see smoking and alcohol on being on the same risk level. Somehow for me, alcohol, if consumed in moderation, just feels to be far less detrimental to health. Some would disagree, but I'd find it hard to hold a viewpoint to the contrary with an sincerity really. It's all about ones relationship to it that matters. That is the crucial thing. If the relationship gets abusive, then maybe for some there is just no option but to jettison it once and for all. I'm not far away from that state, but I'm not there yet either.

Anyway.....I'm still on the wagon!
Friday night? YACF and You Tube?....living the dream 

[Paul]

How's everyone?
How did Friday go, L CC?
chrisb - how's your lurgy?
Basil? Did you stick to one?
And Von Broad - how was the rest of your Friday night?

I went to the Holly Bush Inn with a friend who drank wine while I had 2 pints of this which, I now see is, annoyingly, not alcohol free as I asked for, but pretty low alcohol (0.5%) - certainly too low to register on the Try Dry app. Oh well, I thought I was alcohol free.
I was expecting a hard time of it, but I had screwed my courage to the sticking place in advance, which helped. As did being the driver.
I found that conversation wasn't quite as easy as when I am having a drink, but I could remember more of it, and it was a good evening.

I'm sure I'll see it through, now, but less sure about staying dry after 31 Jan.

[Wowbagger]

Opened a bottle of Old Speckled Hen last night.
Not that bothered.  We'll see what happens.

If you haven't drunk it yet, it will be flat.

[L CC]

How did Friday go, L CC?

Ach I'm OK. I'm unbothered by drink so I can switch it off instantly.

Mr Smith is plodding on.

[JonBuoy]

How's everyone?
How did Friday go, L CC?
chrisb - how's your lurgy?
Basil? Did you stick to one?
And Von Broad - how was the rest of your Friday night?

I went to the Holly Bush Inn with a friend who drank wine while I had 2 pints of this which, I now see is, annoyingly, not alcohol free as I asked for, but pretty low alcohol (0.5%) - certainly too low to register on the Try Dry app. Oh well, I thought I was alcohol free.
I was expecting a hard time of it, but I had screwed my courage to the sticking place in advance, which helped. As did being the driver.
I found that conversation wasn't quite as easy as when I am having a drink, but I could remember more of it, and it was a good evening.

I'm sure I'll see it through, now, but less sure about staying dry after 31 Jan.

You really aren't making it easy for yourself but well done on resisting the lure of the Pedigree 

[chrisbainbridge]

I had my medicinal alcohol and a second night.  lurgy now gone and back to alcohol free.

[Von Broad]

And Von Broad - how was the rest of your Friday night?

Bit boring, but fine, thank you.

I popped into the beer shop over the weekend to show my face [and to see others!] and had a couple of alcohol free somethings or others. [That was also 0.5% alcohol.......I think the majority of them are].But I do feel vulnerable in social situations without alcohol. It's a clear demonstration how how I use alcohol to shore up my defences. This I've known for years, but it's kind of interesting to 'feel' it once again. When something's been almost apart of who you are, when it gets removed it's going to make you feel slightly odd. To say the least.

I've also befriended a customer of mine, a slightly older lady, a widow and mother of three, who gave up alcohol at the age of....17!!! [She had a kind of odd and wild childhood.....as she describes it!! Shes was encouraged by her mother at the age of 12 to drink...and smoke! 1960's innit...rock on baby!! ] She stopped at 17 because alcohol just made her unbearably sad and melancholic. Quite a decision for a 17yr old though.
This is the first time I've ever reached out to a person for company who doesn't drink, and I feel a friendship developing here, which I think will be a good thing.
There is a part of me that forever wonders, how do people get through life without alcohol? What on earth do they do? Where do they go? As she commented, it just goes to show you how ingrained my drinking is with the way I'm perceiving the world.

[Paul]

Wow.

[Basil]

Basil? Did you stick to one?

Yes, I did.

Stayed free for the weekend,  but having a beer with the boy tonight.
So that's me out I'm afraid.
Best wishes all.

[hellymedic]

I've spent much time socialising with Edgware CTC.
Some folk drink.
Some folk drink LOTS.
Some don't seem to drink any alcohol.
All seem to have adequate social lives.
Those who go without alcohol don't see it as an issue.
Nor do those that drink.

[Wowbagger]

Basil? Did you stick to one?

Yes, I did.

Stayed free for the weekend,  but having a beer with the boy tonight.
So that's me out I'm afraid.
Best wishes all.

Have you tried Whamageddon in January?

[Paul]

And Von Broad - how was the rest of your Friday night?

Bit boring, but fine, thank you.

I popped into the beer shop over the weekend to show my face [and to see others!] and had a couple of alcohol free somethings or others. [That was also 0.5% alcohol.......I think the majority of them are].But I do feel vulnerable in social situations without alcohol. It's a clear demonstration how how I use alcohol to shore up my defences. This I've known for years, but it's kind of interesting to 'feel' it once again. When something's been almost apart of who you are, when it gets removed it's going to make you feel slightly odd. To say the least.

I've also befriended a customer of mine, a slightly older lady, a widow and mother of three, who gave up alcohol at the age of....17!!! [She had a kind of odd and wild childhood.....as she describes it!! Shes was encouraged by her mother at the age of 12 to drink...and smoke! 1960's innit...rock on baby!! ] She stopped at 17 because alcohol just made her unbearably sad and melancholic. Quite a decision for a 17yr old though.
This is the first time I've ever reached out to a person for company who doesn't drink, and I feel a friendship developing here, which I think will be a good thing.
There is a part of me that forever wonders, how do people get through life without alcohol? What on earth do they do? Where do they go? As she commented, it just goes to show you how ingrained my drinking is with the way I'm perceiving the world.

Some of what you say resonates with me, especially dealing with social situations. I think a lot of people would say that I am fairly extroverted, but I do find social situations quite hard work, and alcohol definitely helps with that, so going into those situations sober is a bit of a challenge. I'm better than I used to be - I think age/experience helps.
I like the sound of your dry new friend. Hope it pans out but - even if it doesn't - it demonstrates a possibility.
 

[Paul]

Past the half way point 

[Regulator]

We have our re-scheduled large team Christmas do tomorrow lunchtime.  Normally a very boozy that goes on until the early hours.  I intend to remain dry.

We also have our NHS team do next week.  Again I intend to remain dry.