Author Topic: Poo sticks  (Read 52958 times)

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #100 on: 07 February, 2020, 01:40:54 pm »
Once you are on their list, you are always on. I ride the black lizard once very year or two years, but I still get sent the birthday present packages. I phone up and say that I don't need them.
It is simpler than it looks.

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #101 on: 12 March, 2020, 07:11:23 pm »
I've just had a letter..........   They want to shove a camera up my bottom  :jurek:       


I suspect that given the upcoming workload on the NHS routine stuff like this may be sidelined & staff deployed elsewhere. 
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Gus

  • Loosing weight stone by stone
    • We will return
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #102 on: 12 March, 2020, 07:47:03 pm »
Had my first test Kit a few weeks ago.
Result came today: All clear, Will recieve a new
Kit in two years

Regulator

  • That's Councillor Regulator to you...
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #103 on: 16 March, 2020, 10:27:17 am »
I didn't get a test kit when I turned 50 or in the two years since...  but I've had three sigmoidoscopies.
Quote from: clarion
I completely agree with Reg.

Green Party Councillor

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #104 on: 16 March, 2020, 12:57:58 pm »
I thought they only sent poo sticks at 60 and did sigmoidoscopy at 55.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #105 on: 16 March, 2020, 02:56:44 pm »
I just tell them I don’t need the poo sticks on account of sitting on mount Olympus at least once every two years. I have to remind the poo sticks people every time.
It is simpler than it looks.

Regulator

  • That's Councillor Regulator to you...
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #106 on: 16 March, 2020, 03:14:39 pm »
I thought they only sent poo sticks at 60 and did sigmoidoscopy at 55.

I'm supposed to have them every two years because of a history of bowel cancer and Crohn's Disease.  Seemed to get them regularly for some years but then, when we moved to Cambridge, I got them for a couple of years and then it became more intermittent and nothing in the last few years.  GP practice gets reminded regularly but still can't get it's act together.

Quote from: clarion
I completely agree with Reg.

Green Party Councillor

Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #108 on: 13 June, 2020, 09:15:29 pm »
I think I'm due another birthday card. I was 62 last Sunday and had one for my 60th...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #109 on: 21 September, 2020, 02:41:11 pm »
The Machine informs me I'll get my FIT kit in a fortnight.

Wowbagger

  • Former Sylph
    • Stuff mostly about weather
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #110 on: 21 September, 2020, 04:02:52 pm »
Many happy returns of the sticks!
Quote from: Dez
It doesn’t matter where you start. Just start.

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #111 on: 21 September, 2020, 09:27:55 pm »
I've heard nothing since the letter in March.   I assume they are busy with other things.   :-\
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #112 on: 24 September, 2020, 11:06:58 am »
My employers send all employees over 50 for advanced health screening every year. Bloods, heart ECG thingy, prostate and poo sticks.

Its august/september, must be time to be probed again  ::-)
<i>Marmite slave</i>

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #113 on: 30 September, 2020, 03:11:15 pm »
Package arrived in mail today.
'What's that?' asked D
'I won't tell you over breakfast. Birthday card from NHS. They send that to you every two years after you're 60.'

D has OCD and poo is taboo. Got cleaning lady to post last envelope. Will probably do the same again...

[ETA] Mission accomplished. Clear for another two years.

Wowbagger

  • Former Sylph
    • Stuff mostly about weather
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #114 on: 17 October, 2020, 01:12:48 am »
I'm due another test and haven't heard from anyone.

I suspect they have got Serco to combine poo sticks with a Covid test - back of the throat, up your nose, up your arse. It's important to get them in the right order.

Quote from: Dez
It doesn’t matter where you start. Just start.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #115 on: 17 October, 2020, 02:23:33 am »
Suspect your will arrive shortly.
My birthday is early June and all my bowel screening has been around early October.

Given your birthday is about three weeks after mine, methinks it won't be long...

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #116 on: 17 October, 2020, 06:31:13 am »
I'm due another test and haven't heard from anyone.

I suspect they have got Serco to combine poo sticks with a Covid test - back of the throat, up your nose, up your arse. It's important to get them in the right order.

This prompted me to look back through this thread for my last test.
September 2018.  So it's already 4 weeks late.
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #117 on: 17 October, 2020, 09:18:37 am »
I'm due another test and haven't heard from anyone.

I suspect they have got Serco to combine poo sticks with a Covid test - back of the throat, up your nose, out your arse. It's important to get them in the right order.

FTFY

Trouble begins when they withdraw the probe.
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

robgul

  • Cycle:End-to-End webmaster
  • cyclist, Cytech accredited mechanic & woodworker
    • Cycle:End-to-End
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #118 on: 17 October, 2020, 12:54:42 pm »
On a slightly different area of the body I had a CT scan a couple of weeks ago to check kidney function (having had bladder cancer and some major surgery in 2014) - delighted to report all flowing well and no sign of cancer recurrence.  Bowel test envelope due imminently.

A bit higher up, my wife went to the breast screening truck a couple of weeks ago .... letter yesterday and she shouted up the stairs "All OK, I've got top tits!"   - who's going to argue with that  :thumbsup:

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #119 on: 17 October, 2020, 03:02:01 pm »
the new poo sticks only need a small single sample on a stick that's a couple of cm long and has shallow ridges that must be covered.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #120 on: 17 October, 2020, 03:11:54 pm »
the new poo sticks only need a small single sample on a stick that's a couple of cm long and has shallow ridges that must be covered.

That's quite a specification for a turd.

Covered with what...?!
It is simpler than it looks.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #121 on: 17 October, 2020, 05:02:07 pm »
The ridges are about ½ mm deep and 2mm apart.

You need to coat stick with a thin layer of poo.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #122 on: 17 October, 2020, 06:03:04 pm »
I don't measure the ridges on my poo  ;)
It is simpler than it looks.

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #123 on: 19 November, 2020, 11:47:43 am »
I've just received a letter.


"As part of the national response to covid-19 the national bowel scope service was paused & decisions are now being made about the future of this service." 


Once these decisions have been made etc etc.



Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #124 on: 19 November, 2020, 12:11:37 pm »
 ???

That sounds like they are going to discontinue it...
It is simpler than it looks.