Author Topic: Today's Malapropisms  (Read 3330 times)

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Today's Malapropisms
« on: 22 September, 2017, 07:15:40 pm »
Some of my friends aren't quite using the right words and I don't wish to point out their errors on social media.

Friend #1 informs us the vertebrates in his spine are in better alignment following recent surgery.
Friend #2 is discussing the ballet which resulted in Brexit.

Giraffe

  • I brake for Giraffes
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #1 on: 23 September, 2017, 08:34:18 am »
Some of my friends aren't quite using the right words and I don't wish to point out their errors on social media.

Friend #1 informs us the vertebrates in his spine are in better alignment following recent surgery.
Friend #2 is discussing the ballet which resulted in Brexit.
#1: better with vertebrates than without - the latter would be a flop.
#2: what's his pointe?
2x4: thick plank; 4x4: 2 of 'em.

Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #2 on: 03 October, 2017, 10:27:07 am »
I really should tell my other half that "defuse" is not the opposite of "confuse".

(I'm not sure that there is a word that is the opposite of "confuse". Any suggestions?)

EDITED to add: "clarify" would have worked in the context.

Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #3 on: 03 October, 2017, 10:34:22 am »
I really should tell my other half that "defuse" is not the opposite of "confuse".

(I'm not sure that there is a word that is the opposite of "confuse". Any suggestions?)
Enlighten

deobfuscation

<i>Marmite slave</i>

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #4 on: 03 October, 2017, 12:49:16 pm »
I really should tell my other half that "defuse" is not the opposite of "confuse".

(I'm not sure that there is a word that is the opposite of "confuse". Any suggestions?)

Profuse?

External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #5 on: 03 October, 2017, 04:58:03 pm »
Contuse?

I looked up *use in Chambers to see if they had something funny and came across a lovely word: circumfuse: to pour a liquid around something:  Pudding, circumfused with custard. :D
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #6 on: 03 October, 2017, 05:20:44 pm »
...on a slate, served with a bespoke cocktail containing 14 varieties of aitch2eau.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #7 on: 03 October, 2017, 07:03:44 pm »
...on a slate, served with a bespoke cocktail containing 14 varieties of aitch2eau.

The latter in a repurposed baked bean tin, I trust?
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #8 on: 04 October, 2017, 08:07:59 am »
Ah, builder's tea!
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #9 on: 04 October, 2017, 08:50:12 am »
'...boiled orange in a worker's boot, with two sugars and yesterday's milk!'
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #10 on: 04 October, 2017, 08:52:59 am »
...on a slate, served with a bespoke cocktail containing 14 varieties of aitch2eau.

The latter in a repurposed baked bean tin, I trust?
By a skinny 21-year-old with an unfeasibly large beard.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #11 on: 06 October, 2017, 08:10:47 am »
They say of the Apocalypse, where the Parthenon is...
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #12 on: 06 October, 2017, 09:27:49 am »
"My friend's an invertebrate smoker."
"You mean 'inveterate', surely."
"No. Invertebrate, no backbone."

I'll get mine too.
Rust never sleeps

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #13 on: 06 October, 2017, 09:26:20 pm »
BMJ Obit:

Quote
...where her father was a water engineer. At the age of 18 she was interred in a Japanese concentration camp (1942-45) and nearly died.

Obit written by professorial daughter of deceased.

People seem to confuse 'defiantly' with 'definitely' rather often.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #14 on: 07 October, 2017, 01:23:13 am »
What, pacifically, is wrong with that?
It is simpler than it looks.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #15 on: 07 October, 2017, 01:34:34 am »
 ;D

snail

  • Inch by inch.
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #16 on: 09 October, 2017, 06:19:22 pm »
My dad was very concerned about a friend's daughter who was not eating and potentially suffering from bulgaria.

Also apparently one of my cousins had terrible eskimo when he was small, made his skin itch all over.

professor palindrome

  • Sex at noon taxes
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #17 on: 09 October, 2017, 07:41:35 pm »
Friends sympathised with us one summer when they believed that parts of our Scottish holiday had been spoiled by midgets. 

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #18 on: 09 October, 2017, 07:49:02 pm »
My dad was very concerned about a friend's daughter who was not eating and potentially suffering from bulgaria.
It must be terrible to see someone turn into a furry, tunnel-dwelling, litter picker.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #19 on: 09 October, 2017, 07:59:32 pm »
Friends sympathised with us one summer when they believed that parts of our Scottish holiday had been spoiled by midgets.

Gordon Strachan agrees on that.
It is simpler than it looks.

Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #20 on: 09 October, 2017, 08:24:37 pm »
There was a guy on the radio this morning who claimed he was "here at St Pancreas Station".
Quote from: tiermat
that's not science, it's semantics.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #21 on: 14 October, 2017, 12:18:25 pm »
Quote
Bob, from Barnstaple, Devon, was also weary of the new meters being hacked. 

From A Spokesman

Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #22 on: 14 October, 2017, 12:24:47 pm »
...on a slate, served with a bespoke cocktail containing 14 varieties of aitch2eau.

The Ladybird Book of The Hipster is great, no?!

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #23 on: 14 October, 2017, 12:26:21 pm »
There was a guy on the radio this morning who claimed he was "here at St Pancreas Station".

"St Pancreas" is one of those that's too fun not to do deliberately.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Today's Malapropisms
« Reply #24 on: 16 October, 2017, 08:59:19 am »
...on a slate, served with a bespoke cocktail containing 14 varieties of aitch2eau.

The Ladybird Book of The Hipster is great, no?!
:thumbsup:
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.