Pogonophobia

[ian]

Actually, when I say cultivated, if they're anything like the bloke I saw earlier, he'd just smeared his face in bostik and stuck it in a vat of assorted pube trimmings.

[L CC]

Sometimes Mr Smith removes his and has a girl face.

[PeteB99]

Was at a Jason Byrne gig the other week where one of the roadies had a full hipster style black beard. During the interval every time he stuck his head through the side curtains looking for the signal from the sound desk the stage lights made him look like he only had half a face.

[Beardy]

I was holidaying with Mrs Beardy PhD, when we had been married but 3 years. On a whim, I shaved my face without first obtaining the necessary work permits. I appeared in the lounge of our rented chalet, sans beard, and the good doctor looked up from her book to acknowledge my presence. The immortal words she spoke have been engraved on my heart ever since. 'You can grow that back again'. She returned to her reading, I regrew my plumage and it was never mentioned again. All has been harmony and happiness since.

The only regret of aging that I have is that my once distinct auburn facial hear is now nearly white. While this does makes me sad, it did lead an amusing encounter last weekend. We were visiting one of those garden centres that attempts to be all things to all men, with a variety of TQT on offer, and of course a Grotto for the coca cola man. this facility is not yet open. But while we were taking tea in the restaurant a person of small dimensions and few years (4ish) was being ushered out of the said facility while pointing wildly at I. The ushering parent was heard to be saying, 'No, that's not him, he's not here yet' 

[lahoski]

I was holidaying with Mrs Beardy PhD, when we had been married but 3 years. On a whim, I shaved my face without first obtaining the necessary work permits. I appeared in the lounge of our rented chalet, sans beard, and the good doctor looked up from her book to acknowledge my presence. The immortal words she spoke have been engraved on my heart ever since. 'You can grow that back again'. She returned to her reading, I regrew my plumage and it was never mentioned again. All has been harmony and happiness since.

I did that once, except I was reuniting my then girlfriend at the train station after several days apart. I was met with, "what the fuck have you done!? It's fucking awful."

Needless to say it never happened again. It may be regularly trimmed to a really very modest length (I look like wazizface with the ginger beard in Game of Thrones if I grow it out but without the (apparently) rugged sex appeal), but it's there.

[fimm]

I've never seen my father without a beard.

A friend of ours grew one once. A certain amount of piss was taken to start with, as you do. Then he accidentally shaved it off due to an unfortunate incident involving not checking that his beard trimmer had the guard fitted before he set to work. Everyone laughed, and then told him to grow his beard back again as he looks much better with it than without it.

[Beardy]

I've never seen my father without a beard.

I have three children all in their 20s who are ignorant to what lies beneath my beard. I have no plans on ever enlightening them 😁

[mattc]

That Mel Gibson looks bloody weird with a full beard.

[fimm]

I've never seen my father without a beard.

I have three children all in their 20s who are ignorant to what lies beneath my beard. I have no plans on ever enlightening them 😁

I'm 45.... I don't expect to ever see my father clean shaven.

[Chris S]

Sometimes Mr Smith removes his and has a girl face.

Sometimes 

(click to show/hide)

[bobb]

(click to show/hide)

That is an absurd amount of facial hair. It makes me want to run. Run away. Very far away...

[rogerzilla]

Bloody hipster.  Bet he rides a fixed-gear bicycle.

Is there a Norfolk equivalent of "Hoxton twat"?  Hunstanton knob?

[Veloman]

Do we class the trimmed beard style, sort of laughing cavalier image, as a beard or does it have to be the full works as in Royal Navy regulations?

Normally grow one in winter, but looks awfully scruffy as it is 3 colours, ginger moustache with brown and grey for the rest.

Oh, and is upper lip hair (moustache) required to be counted as a beard, or is that just varying degrees of weird beardness!

[Sergeant Pluck]

My definition of a beard is that it is of a length or style that needs trimming with scissors. I use trimmers - any longer and the beard goes into Irish street-drinker mode and I have yet to see what happens beyond that. Some people don’t suit full beards and I suspect I am one of them.

I’m not sure if Wiggins suits his:



From the Guardian:
https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2017/dec/09/bradley-wiggins-rowing-olympics-tokyo-2020

[Samuel D]

Per the Guardian article:

“He wears his hair long these days, and has grown a beard so bushy you would blunt scissors trying to cut it. He was sporting a thick white headband and a bright blue tracksuit too. It was an unlikely look. He might have been auditioning for the next Wes Anderson movie rather than a spot on the GB rowing squad.”

Sounds about right.

[rogerzilla]

It makes him look a lot older and more likely to be drinking something from a brown paper bag.

[Pingu]

Craft beer tastes better with a beard. Trufax.

[ElyDave]

Craft beer tastes better with a beard. Trufax.

I know, I'm drinking one right now.

[Pingu]

Craft beer tastes better with a beard. Trufax.

I know, I'm drinking one right now.

 

That reminds me, I keep meaning to do something.

[ian]

I am currently verifying this craft beardiness.

For bonus hipster points, a mango and guava pale ale, and a helping of heirloom variety popcorn (that I popped with deli-sourced Tuscan oil and herbs and sprinkled with pink Himalayan salt).

[L CC]

Is there a Norfolk equivalent of "Hoxton twat"?  Hunstanton knob?

Given he now lives Ooop North, it's worse. Hutton (Rudby) Hapless.

[Zipperhead]

It makes him look a lot older and more likely to be drinking something from a brown paper bag.

He looks like he could do with some Ex-lax as well.

[meddyg]

I feel a beard quiz coming on...




- anyone ?

[ElyDave]

Long, grey and white, definitely not hipster.

Next?

[jsabine]

He looks like a barrel of laughs. John Knox?