Author Topic: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)  (Read 2930473 times)

annie

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #50 on: 19 June, 2008, 11:28:36 am »
I can't think of anything that upsets me, I guess I ought to find something :)

Great.  You've just spoiled the mood of a wonderfully vitriolic thread.  >:(

 :-*


I know.  I am angry that I can't find anything to be angry about, does that count?

Now you have got me thinking..... green paint ;)

TheLurker

  • Goes well with magnolia.
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #51 on: 19 June, 2008, 11:33:54 am »
It's not _my_ bl**dy M&S/Sainsbury's/whoever!

A handset with a mobile 'phone contract is _not_ free.

It's not an, "outstanding balance", it's a _debt_.

Streets full of CCTV, compulsory ID cards, insecure databases full of personal data and the watering down of habeus corpus do _not_ increase civil liberties.  Gordon _is_ a moron.
Τα πιο όμορφα ταξίδια γίνονται με τις δικές μας δυνάμεις - Φίλοι του Ποδήλατου

tiermat

  • According to Jane, I'm a Unisex SpaceAdmin
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #52 on: 19 June, 2008, 11:37:53 am »
  Gordon _is_ a moron.

You are Jilted John and ICMFP
I feel like Captain Kirk, on a brand new planet every day, a little like King Kong on top of the Empire State

Riggers

  • Mine's a pipe, er… pint!
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #53 on: 19 June, 2008, 11:49:15 am »
Taps that aren't turned off properly or lids not tightened up on jars!!

Women, you know it's you!!!!  >:(
Certainly never seen cycling south of Sussex

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #54 on: 19 June, 2008, 12:23:40 pm »
If I wanted salad and mayo and egg and on my sandwich, then I would fucking ask for it.  Now I have to use 20 minutes of my half hour traipsing down to the shop to get what I paid for.  Useless.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #55 on: 19 June, 2008, 12:27:39 pm »
Hello.  Yes, you.  Bloke in a black Audi.  When the temporary traffic lights turn red, this means STOP.  It does not mean overtake the car in front and blast through the red light anyway, nearly taking out an oncoming motorcyclist in the process, just because you deem yourself too important to wait for a minute before joining the next traffic jam.  You are a prize cock.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #56 on: 19 June, 2008, 12:38:35 pm »
I've been resisting posting this.  I think I've mentioned it before.  I'm rather embarrassed that it irritates me as much as it does.

People who press both the UP and Down buttons when calling a lift.  >:(

Ping!
Them, "Are you going down?"
Us, "<sigh> No we're going up"

You brainless bloody idiots.  Pressing both buttons won't get you a lift any quicker.  Infact, you will now have to wait longer.

I think that it's not so much the action that pisses me off.  It the dumb stupidity that just makes me despair.
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #57 on: 19 June, 2008, 12:42:32 pm »
If you do not wish to be thought of as an hopeless reactionary, try quoting some more up-to-date Joke Comedy Stuffs than Monty Python's Flying Circus.

And I'm warning you if it happens again, I shall come down on this programme like a ton of bricks.
The old Legion hand told the recruit, "When things are bad, bleu, try not to make them worse, because it is very likely that they are bad enough already." -- Robert Ruark

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #58 on: 19 June, 2008, 01:02:46 pm »
If I wanted salad and mayo and egg and on my sandwich, then I would fucking ask for it.  Now I have to use 20 minutes of my half hour traipsing down to the shop to get what I paid for.  Useless.

And when you fuck up an order, don't try to blame me for your fuck-up. 

Wascally Weasel

  • Slayer of Dragons and killer of threads.
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #59 on: 19 June, 2008, 01:26:01 pm »
The change from a £20 note for an order that costs £10.60 is £9.40.  Please don't try explaining to me again that £8.40 is the correct change.

It's a rubbish rant, I know.  I shall work up to greater things

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #60 on: 19 June, 2008, 01:38:43 pm »
Wot Basil said.  Also, when the lifts in our building stop at an intermediate floor, two things happen:

  • it goes "ping", and
  • a green arrow lights up above the door

The arrow points down if the lift is descending, and points up if the lift is ascending.  Who says there's no place for logic in such matters, eh?

However, a small but finite group of the Clue-free will do one of two things:

  • get in a descending lift and press a button for a floor above the one they're on, or
  • ask "up or down?" when the doors open

How in the name of all that's holy did someone as stupid as you manage to get a job here ???
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #61 on: 19 June, 2008, 02:01:13 pm »
Newsreaders who say: "more of us than ever are overweight/leaving the country" or "a new study shows that we are spending more on beer/chips/cars etc etc"

You maybe, the man in the street possibly, but don't try and tell me what I'm doing!
Let your mind unravel ... down that road you're travellin' ...

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #62 on: 19 June, 2008, 02:05:31 pm »
Newsreaders who say: "more of us than ever are overweight/leaving the country" or "a new study shows that we are spending more on beer/chips/cars etc etc"

You maybe, the man in the street possibly, but don't try and tell me what I'm doing!

And while on the subj.  I realise the BRITONS' Broadcasting Corporation cannot always choose those whom it interviews, but the next time I hear an interviewer referring to the interviewee's offspring as "kids", I shall likely go postal.

You are talking about people1, you thick oaf, not goats.

1 - except possibly in Swindon, obv.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #63 on: 19 June, 2008, 02:48:41 pm »
This thread is like watching an angry Basil Fawlty. He gets louder and louder, and I cannot help smiling.

(" well you started it ... ")
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Tiger

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #64 on: 19 June, 2008, 03:12:12 pm »
scooterists - putting your feet on the back footrests and leaning forward instead of using the fron footrset does not convert your 50cc scooter into an faired racing motorbike.

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #65 on: 19 June, 2008, 05:07:08 pm »
Talking of kids ;D

When you've used your 17th toilet roll this week, dont leave the empty cardboard tube in the holder and the newly started roll on the floor. Change the bloody thing.

And if you are 16 and just finished school for the summer, understand you will be expected to do chores and not be waited on hand and foot by two fully employed adults who actually support you as well.

And get your hair cut.

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #66 on: 19 June, 2008, 05:15:05 pm »
Talking of kids ;D

When you've used your 17th toilet roll this week, dont leave the empty cardboard tube in the holder and the newly started roll on the floor. Change the bloody thing.

And if you are 16 and just finished school for the summer, understand you will be expected to do chores and not be waited on hand and foot by two fully employed adults who actually support you as well.

And get your hair cut.

But that's just like soooooooooooo unfair!
"Yes please" said Squirrel "biscuits are our favourite things."

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #67 on: 19 June, 2008, 05:27:11 pm »
Dog owners:

"Aw, isn't he friendly?" is not an acceptable verbal exchange when your uncontrollable mutt jumps all over me in the street covering my work trousers in mud, crap and fuck knows what else.

Likewise, when your overly aggressive Alsatian starts growling and barking at me, "It's OK, he won't bite" is not much help. How do I know he won't bite? I bet every person who's ever been maimed by a psychotic canine was told "It's OK, he won't bite."

Keep the hound under control!

Edit: I love dogs - this was aimed at some of my moronic neighbours who can't keep their dogs under control!
Those wonderful norks are never far from my thoughts, oh yeah!

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #68 on: 19 June, 2008, 05:44:53 pm »
Dog owners:

"Aw, isn't he friendly?" is not an acceptable verbal exchange when your uncontrollable mutt jumps all over me in the street covering my work trousers in mud, crap and fuck knows what else.

Likewise, when your overly aggressive Alsatian starts growling and barking at me, "It's OK, he won't bite" is not much help. How do I know he won't bite? I bet every person who's ever been maimed by a psychotic canine was told "It's OK, he won't bite."

Keep the hound under control!

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/SXn2QVipK2o&rel=1" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/SXn2QVipK2o&rel=1</a> ;D

Eccentrica Gallumbits

  • Rock 'n' roll and brew, rock 'n' roll and brew...
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #69 on: 19 June, 2008, 06:53:26 pm »
BBC journalists - I don't mind you cutting out large chunks of our conversation. I do mind that "Edinburgh is not the easiest place to cycle as it's hilly and windy. I don't think motorists really appreciate how unprotected cyclists are from the elements and how they need to give us lots of room when it's windy because we are vulnerable to being blown across the road" was cut to "Edinburgh is not the easiest place to cycle as it's hilly and windy. I don't think motorists really appreciate how unprotected cyclists are from the elements." It wasn't a whinge about the rain. It was a point about road safety.
My feminist marxist dialectic brings all the boys to the yard.


Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #70 on: 19 June, 2008, 09:08:38 pm »
Forum members - when you have just been interviewed by a journalist do not be surprised when they tweak your words just a tiny bit so that it completely alters the sense of what you wanted to say.
The old Legion hand told the recruit, "When things are bad, bleu, try not to make them worse, because it is very likely that they are bad enough already." -- Robert Ruark

tonycollinet

  • No Longer a western province of Númenor
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #71 on: 19 June, 2008, 09:16:03 pm »
CATS

In - or Out

make up your Damn Mind.

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #72 on: 20 June, 2008, 09:27:51 am »
CATS

In - or Out

make up your Damn Mind.

...and eat the ****** catfood before you start miaowing for more....

Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #73 on: 20 June, 2008, 11:05:16 am »
Cat owners: When somebody complains about your cat s***ing in their garden, do not tell them that the best way to avoid this is to get a cat of their own. If they wanted a cat crapping everywhere then they wouldn't be complaining, would they?  ::-)
Life is too important to be taken seriously.

RogerT

  • Playing with a big steamy thing
Re: The RANT thread...
« Reply #74 on: 20 June, 2008, 11:21:46 am »
Cats, just because you did not care  for the Hills Science super dooper senior do everything biscuits, you really did not need to projectile vomit them all over the computer monitor and keyboard.

DID YOU ???

And you.. Senior Cat, piss on my desk one more time and I will cut your cock off and make you eat it ( you might prefer it to the biscuits )