Author Topic: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread  (Read 436748 times)

cygnet

  • I'm part of the association
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #275 on: 22 December, 2016, 07:59:25 pm »
Only noticed after I got to work. And with different fastening mechanisms!
I Said, I've Got A Big Stick

fuzzy

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #276 on: 23 December, 2016, 08:13:59 am »
Are you a Div or does your sartorial elegance make you the new style icon?

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #277 on: 23 December, 2016, 08:40:35 am »
Only noticed after I got to work. And with different fastening mechanisms!

I think that gets you div-of-the-year award! Congratulations (or something). That is seriously some major distracted-thinking going on there.

<i>Marmite slave</i>

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #278 on: 23 December, 2016, 03:59:46 pm »
People's powers of observation are such that most of cygnet's colleagues are unlikely to have noticed unless told...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #279 on: 23 December, 2016, 04:15:16 pm »
Top divving, Cygnet! And just sufficiently non-matching colour schemes to enhance the effect without making it too obvious.  :D
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Vince

  • Can't climb; won't climb
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #280 on: 23 December, 2016, 05:07:15 pm »
I forgot to lock the lateral adjustment on the router table...

(click to show/hide)
216km from Marsh Gibbon

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #281 on: 23 December, 2016, 06:39:05 pm »
^^^^ Oops! ^^^^
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #282 on: 26 December, 2016, 11:15:47 am »
I sharpened a penknife yesterday and tested it on the edge of a folded-up Shimano installation leaflet that was lying about the bench.  As I cut into edge A, edge B cut into my thumb.
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

LittleWheelsandBig

  • Whimsy Rider
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #283 on: 26 December, 2016, 12:11:23 pm »
 You aren't the first to do this. Still funny though.
Wheel meet again, don't know where, don't know when...

fuzzy

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #284 on: 11 February, 2017, 11:51:34 pm »
So i'm doing the washing up and working on a pyrex casserole dish lid on which there are spots of burnt deposits. I'm scrubbing away furiously on a spot which isn't shifting so wonder if it is on the other side of the lid. I turn it over and scrub away furiously and unsuccessfully. I then realise the spot is a blood blister on my fingertip......

 :facepalm:

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #285 on: 12 February, 2017, 09:00:23 am »
Normally walk to work and carry a brolly (about 12 ins long). On Friday, as I'm leaving the building for home I notice spits
of rain. "Oh, where's my brolly?" I said. Probably on my desk. So back up 4 flights of stairs, check my desk area; brolly not there.
Get a colleague to help me look for it. Brolly not found. Go downstairs to an admin/security area and report it missing.


On arrival at home I find it where I'd put it the previous evening (next to the coat stand).



SoreTween

  • Most of me survived the Pennine Bridleway.
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #286 on: 14 March, 2017, 09:16:58 pm »
Arrived at gym with little time to get changed before spin class due to a succession of minor div events.  I've had a real day of it.  Anyway opened bag to find I've packed a pair of undercrakers instead of gym shorts.
2023 targets: Survive. Maybe.
There is only one infinite resource in this universe; human stupidity.

Vince

  • Can't climb; won't climb
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #287 on: 16 March, 2017, 07:32:06 am »
There is a lay-by near us. Sometimes there is a trailer selling fast food. Sometimes there is a trailer promoting hot tubs.
The hot tub trailer is always parked in the direction of travel on that side of the road, the burger trailer is always parked against the direction of travel.
After months of passing I have finally realised that there is only one trailer with a serving hatch on one side and promotional posters on the back.
216km from Marsh Gibbon

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #288 on: 23 March, 2017, 09:07:44 pm »
Bought some new cycling shoes (I'm finally going to give proper road pedals a try, after years of fearing them and resolving never to give up my SPDs...). Tried them on - they seemed too tight around the toes, which is weird as they're a Northwave 42, I've got several other pairs of Northwave shoes in a 42 and they fit just fine.

Was just about to pack them up for returning, when I tried them on again. This time, I discovered the cardboard bit inside the toe, which I'd forgotten to take out when I tried them on the first time. :facepalm:

fuzzy

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #289 on: 24 March, 2017, 01:54:58 pm »
So, the wall bracket I had to repair has a plastic plug blanking then screw hole. Judicious application of a small flat bladed screw driver failed to extract the plug. Time to break out the bradawl. Slip- Ouch!!!! Claret........

Fecking div ::-)

clarion

  • Tyke
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #290 on: 24 March, 2017, 02:07:21 pm »
My Parker fountain pen was empty.  I washed it out, then refilled it carefully, without a drop of ink going astray (which, I confess, is rare).

Buoyed by this, I decided to check my Pilot fountain pen.  Yeah, a bit low, so I went to fill it up. 

'Out, damned spot!' :(
Getting there...

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #291 on: 24 March, 2017, 07:40:05 pm »
Can anyone explain why, when hand spinning the crank, fast, after lubing, I decided to try to slow the rear wheel down with my hand? by clutching vaguely the bit near the (steel) mudguard? No? I just need to look at the thread title you say?

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #292 on: 24 March, 2017, 11:18:48 pm »
This morning. Very first job of the day. Removing a brake disc. Now, this is usually done with a T25 in my trusty, ratchet bit driver. Nice chunky handle, pleasing ratchet action, easily reversible. This time the bolts were just too tight and I had to resort to the L-shaped key. Still too tight. Just give an extra tweek. OUCH! The bolt gave in and the knuckle on my middle finger was very neatly sliced by the disc edge. DICKHEAD!
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #293 on: 25 March, 2017, 11:12:51 pm »
Only just getting it mobile now. This morning my finger looked like it was auditioning for 'the Elephant Man'. I've spent the day wearing vinyl gloves to keep it clean. Bloody sore thobut...
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #294 on: 27 March, 2017, 04:45:43 pm »
It's taken until 15 minutes ago for me to be caught out by the GMT to BST switch – or rather by Transponders' failure to allow for it. Well, TBH it did clearly say GMT in the initial email, so I've only myself to blame. Still, that gives me an extra hour to finish tomorrow morning.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #295 on: 01 April, 2017, 07:40:14 pm »
MrsC and I were meeting a Facebook friend of hers at Stonehenge today. As usual the traffic was bad going west (it being a Saturday, the tidal flow reverses on Sunday afternoons), so the friend was rather late. We sat in the car for a while before deciding we'd go and have a look round the shop and café while waiting.
We then have a very pleasant lunch and an equally pleasant afternoon looking at the Stones and round the new museum.
It was the friend's birthday so we had brought some flowers. I was deputed to go and fetch these from our car. Can't find my keys. Borrow MrsC's, go get flowers. Then start the hunt for my keys. They are not in any of my pockets, which is where I would normally put them. They are not in the bag I was carrying. I can only assume I've dropped them somewhere. But Stonehenge is a big site and we've 'done' all of it! So I go to the information place, they get on the radios, no luck. They take details. I go to the café. Not their either.
For want of anything else, I go back to the car to search my bag again. Still no keys. Then I look in the front.
They they are. Still in the ignition. So the car had been sitting there for over three hours, open, with the keys all ready to be driven off.  :facepalm:
"No matter how slow you go, you're still lapping everybody on the couch."

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #296 on: 03 April, 2017, 11:31:39 am »
This is probably the right place to confess that a couple of years ago I was dagging our sheep and got to a particularly crusty bit which offered a lot of resistance to the shears. So I squeezed harder and nipped the end of the poor sheep's tail off.  It's surprising how far a startled ewe can jump, whilst squirting blood juice.  Expensive mistake :-(
(Sheep is fine, she's expecting lamb(s) any day.  Mrs Q does the dagging now...)

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #297 on: 03 April, 2017, 01:21:45 pm »
Yesterday morning, I was sat happily outside with a cup of coffee as I applied black hammerite to a wrought iron gate.  The small tin of paint looked exactly the same diameter and colour as the coffee from above.

A dip of hammerite brush does little to improve the flavour of hot lava java.
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #298 on: 03 April, 2017, 01:40:24 pm »
But the gate is now nicely awake?

caerau

  • SR x 3 - PBP fail but 1090 km - hey - not too bad
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #299 on: 03 April, 2017, 04:26:25 pm »
Well it could have been worse.  You could have taken a swig from the hammerite tin!
It's a reverse Elvis thing.