The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread

[rafletcher]

That is the same job wot I did do, for a company that was called Dresser Atlas when I started.
'Wireline engineer' it is called.
I went on to be a training instructor on the subject.

Dont miss it one bit.

I've always been a topsides person,  what goes on subsurface is witchcraft as far as I'm concerned.

Dresser Atlas, did that eventually become part of Atlas Copco, or get subsumed elsewhere?

Nothing to do with Atlas Copco, although they do have a huge portfolio of companies. Useless facts, the business started out making steam locomotives, and a bright spark designed tools to speed things up, so Atlas evolved into a tooling supplier. Major breakthrough was a rock drill that could be operated by 1 man instead of 3, using (I kid you not) “the Swedish method”. Later bought a compressor company in Belgium so they had both the tooling (now huge stuff for rock breaking) and power source (compressed air) in house.

I used to work for Seaco, part of Baker Production Services (until that was closed down due to some senior management malfeasance and I was transferred to Baker Oil Tools) and we made wireline winches, wireline tooling and mechanical downhole pressure and temperature recorders. The winches were hydraulically driven, and had air turbine powered cab lights. The Hydraulics, though, were powered by Ford diesels, and we had one back that had gassed up. Quite novel taking off the head and seeing all 6 pistons at TDC.

My neighbour was a wireline operator. He aged about 10 years every 2 week shift he had offshore!

[Jurek]

From what I understand they all became one company. I certainly remember him working for the firm when it was called Baker-Atlas, although what it was called at the end of his career I can’t remember.  He worked for them from leaving uni to retierment through a number of mergers and name changes.

It was Baker Atlas when I was canned about 6 years ago. There is a fair chance I know him if he passed through Montrose Training Centre in the 10 years prior to that.

Didn't Atlas Copco make air compressors?

[Beardy]

From what I understand they all became one company. I certainly remember him working for the firm when it was called Baker-Atlas, although what it was called at the end of his career I can’t remember.  He worked for them from leaving uni to retierment through a number of mergers and name changes.

It was Baker Atlas when I was canned about 6 years ago. There is a fair chance I know him if he passed through Montrose Training Centre in the 10 years prior to that.

He was off-shore in the early eighties when he met my sister. He’s often stated that with a degree in geology he wouldn’t even get an interview these days (from about 95 on I suppose) becuase there’s some much specialisation in degrees now.

He was at Aberdeen from when they were married in 87 (they were planning for a Middle East posting when the company changed its plans and 2 weeks before the wedding they told him he was going to,Aberdeen instead!). I think it was Baker Wireline at that point. They were in Kuwait when the first Gulf War kicked off and then spend a good portion of time in Abu Dhabi, by which time he was doing log analysis and sales. He was the Middle East and Eastern manager before they finally transferred him back to Aberdeen before he was eventually laid off/retired.

They've had a good life, but regret that they never got a Stateside posting which I know my sister in particular would have liked.

[ElyDave]

From what I understand they all became one company. I certainly remember him working for the firm when it was called Baker-Atlas, although what it was called at the end of his career I can’t remember.  He worked for them from leaving uni to retierment through a number of mergers and name changes.

It was Baker Atlas when I was canned about 6 years ago. There is a fair chance I know him if he passed through Montrose Training Centre in the 10 years prior to that.

Didn't Atlas Copco make air compressors?

Amongst other things, that's what I know them for, but have a major bid underway for atlas copco vacuum techniques . They seem to have fingers in multiple pies

[Diver300]

The Hydraulics, though, were powered by Ford diesels, and we had one back that had gassed up. Quite novel taking off the head and seeing all 6 pistons at TDC.

What had happened there? Had it over-revved and broken all the connecting rods?

[Mr Larrington]

Just went to 'stow Central on the Perfectly Good Gentleman’s Mountain Bicycle.  Forgot gloves.  Grubby little paws now even grubbier thanks to ancient grip shifters slowly turning back into black sticky primordial ooze.

Bah!

[T42]

Just went to 'stow Central on the Perfectly Good Gentleman’s Mountain Bicycle.  Forgot gloves.  Grubby little paws now even grubbier thanks to ancient grip shifters slowly turning back into black sticky primordial ooze.

Bah!

We have a set of saucepans that have all gone that way over the course of the summer.

[rafletcher]

The Hydraulics, though, were powered by Ford diesels, and we had one back that had gassed up. Quite novel taking off the head and seeing all 6 pistons at TDC.

What had happened there? Had it over-revved and broken all the connecting rods?

Basically yes. When the engine gassed up it started to run away. That caused the governor on the inlet to shut the air intake abruptly, so descending pistons pull a vacuum, or try to.

[Diver300]

The Hydraulics, though, were powered by Ford diesels, and we had one back that had gassed up. Quite novel taking off the head and seeing all 6 pistons at TDC.

What had happened there? Had it over-revved and broken all the connecting rods?

Basically yes. When the engine gassed up it started to run away. That caused the governor on the inlet to shut the air intake abruptly, so descending pistons pull a vacuum, or try to.

The force from atmospheric pressure (or even crankcase pressure) is 1/2 of 1% of FA compared to the acceleration force on a piston at TDC. I suspect that damage came simply from over-reving.

[Ham]

Champion.

I'm assembling a ukulele kit for littleun's fifth birthday having decided that putting most of the kit together to a point where we can finish assembly on the day is the best idea. I'm at the bit where I need to fix the plastic fretboard and nut using my industrial strength superglue. So I put on plastic gloves, don't I? Coz I'm not a div, am I? I actually make a fair fist of fixing them, coz I'm not a div, am I? there may be some excess glue floating around but that's not a problem is it, since I have those gloves on. Yep. Job well done, I think I'll drink my coffee now, in celebration. Before taking off the gloves 

Not the biggest one ever, and it is solveable, but it did make me laugh.

[rower40]

Don’t laugh too hard if your coffee mug is superglued to your mouth…

[GdS]

For the last couple of years I've heard a distant bell from the local school at about 0820; sounded a bit like an electric rather than a hand ringing type. I presumed it was a signal to open the several gates in.

Turns out it's a Nissan Leaf across the road which chimes when the Mum puts it into reverse to take her kids to (another) school 

I don't think it ever gets driven otherwise....

[Kim]

Stanley knife vs thumb.   

Deep enough to be serious, but not serious enough to seek medical attention.  Superglue has stopped most of the bleeding.  Mostly.

[Jurek]

Stanley knife vs thumb.   

Deep enough to be serious, but not serious enough to seek medical attention.  Superglue has stopped most of the bleeding.  Mostly.

SG is good for stuff like that.
It means you can carry on working with the pernickety stuff without half a ton of Elastoplast impeding progress.

[Ham]

Aaaand it's Sandie Shaw on the turntables! We're gonna spin Something Always There To Remind Me, remember that, rockers.


(in my case, a thumb scar from 53 years ago)

[Kim]

Stanley knife vs thumb.   

Deep enough to be serious, but not serious enough to seek medical attention.  Superglue has stopped most of the bleeding.  Mostly.

SG is good for stuff like that.
It means you can carry on working with the pernickety stuff without half a ton of Elastoplast impeding progress.

Except every time I forget to not use it it starts bleeding again.  Turns out that small spanners can be operated barakta-style, and holding things creatively while soldering is normal, but I'm incapable of stripping wire properly, tearing bread or undoing the belt on the trousers I'm currently wearing without left thumb involvement.

I expect tomorrow's pedal car racing might be interesting.  Will bring plenty of micropore, and full-finger gloves.

[ElyDave]

Stanley knife vs thumb.   

Deep enough to be serious, but not serious enough to seek medical attention.  Superglue has stopped most of the bleeding.  Mostly.

SG is good for stuff like that.
It means you can carry on working with the pernickety stuff without half a ton of Elastoplast impeding progress.

Except every time I forget to not use it it starts bleeding again.  Turns out that small spanners can be operated barakta-style, and holding things creatively while soldering is normal, but I'm incapable of stripping wire properly, tearing bread or undoing the belt on the trousers I'm currently wearing without left thumb involvement.

I expect tomorrow's pedal car racing might be interesting.  Will bring plenty of micropore, and full-finger gloves.

Durapore is more bettererr in my experience.

Or not chopping your thumb in half, but hey ho.

[ElyDave]

Just went to 'stow Central on the Perfectly Good Gentleman’s Mountain Bicycle.  Forgot gloves.  Grubby little paws now even grubbier thanks to ancient grip shifters slowly turning back into black sticky primordial ooze.

Bah!

We have a set of saucepans that have all gone that way over the course of the summer.

In my case it was my cycling glasses, the rubberising of the arms went a s gooey as a blackjack in the heat

[Kim]

Just went to 'stow Central on the Perfectly Good Gentleman’s Mountain Bicycle.  Forgot gloves.  Grubby little paws now even grubbier thanks to ancient grip shifters slowly turning back into black sticky primordial ooze.

Bah!

We have a set of saucepans that have all gone that way over the course of the summer.

In my case it was my cycling glasses, the rubberising of the arms went a s gooey as a blackjack in the heat

I note that our perfectly good Alpkit camping lantern is starting to go that way.

The Psion5-style flaking off in little bits that get everywhere failure mode is marginally less annoying.

[andrewc]

That happens to lots of otherwise useful bits of kit & I've never found a way to stop it.  In time the sticky black residue gets all over other stuff as well.


Stanley knife,  ouch.   Invest in a pair of those automatic wire strippers ?

[phantasmagoriana]

Using the handheld mode of my steam mop to steam curtains (they were *very* creased, having been sitting in a pile on the floor, and steaming them in situ seemed marginally more appealing than ironing them before hanging). Wondered how hot the steam was, so put my hand behind the curtain while steaming it to find out.

Reader, it was hot.

[Mrs Pingu]

@kim I used a Compeed to good effect last time I had superfuckingsharpthing Vs finger interface.

[ian]

Operating a potato peeler yesterday I peeled the end of my little finger.

To be fair, a medical issue has given me clumsy hands, so I really had a very good excuse not to be peeling potatoes, but I fancied a fish pie.

[Peter]

"Fish and finger pie" instead?  (Penny Lane)

Hope you aren't too sore.

[ian]

Slicing jalapeños earlier didn’t aid matters.