Yet Another Cycling Forum

Off Topic => The Pub => Topic started by: Adrian on 02 August, 2010, 02:42:29 pm

Title: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Adrian on 02 August, 2010, 02:42:29 pm
in public again (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-10840475)
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Chris S on 02 August, 2010, 02:46:33 pm
"Frankly swimming in the Thames is not only ignorant it is selfish too," said David Snelson, Port of London Authority chief harbour master.

Although on this occasion, failing to drown was probably the more selfish thing to do.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: mattc on 02 August, 2010, 02:51:03 pm
Bunch of killjoys!

I read the column on Saturday and really enjoyed it - a tale of derring-do by an ordinary bloke.

(he's still not in my good books though, not by a long way ... )
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Charlotte on 02 August, 2010, 03:21:44 pm
Darwin?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: jogler on 02 August, 2010, 03:24:50 pm
ref. the thread title....
nowt new is it ::-)
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Julian on 02 August, 2010, 03:30:46 pm
Has anybody suggested stringing wire across the Thames to stop him doing it?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Charlotte on 02 August, 2010, 03:53:44 pm
;D
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Hilldodger on 02 August, 2010, 03:58:48 pm
Wish I'd been there to my foot on his head.

I'm sorry, did I just say that out loud?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Mr Larrington on 02 August, 2010, 03:58:59 pm
They've already stopped some other nutter from swimming in that part of the Thames.  He's attempting to go from the source of the Thames to the summit of Everest entirely under his own power, but had to get out and run a half-marathon round the dodgy bits.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: andygates on 02 August, 2010, 04:23:59 pm
They've no sense of fun.

Mind you, I've lost count of the number of times I've been present at a tide-table balls-up.  Best of all was at the Corryvreckan.  Whirlpool.  Of DEATH.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Wowbagger on 02 August, 2010, 04:26:45 pm
Has anybody suggested stringing wire across the Thames to stop him doing it?

That was my immediate thought.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Manotea on 02 August, 2010, 04:39:51 pm
Its a funny thing, but the needle of my Grinkometer barely flickered on the AAGill 'witticism' about the "Dyke on a Bike", that comment being rather lost in the general, ah, robustness of the piece.

On the other hand the needle slammed straight across the dial when I read Parris's latest effort. He must have been out of mind writing a piece de-facto encouraging idiots to swim across the Thames at night. What next, train tunnel running? Using electrical pylon cables as death slides? The mind boggles.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Wowbagger on 02 August, 2010, 04:43:28 pm
Its a funny thing, but the needle of my Grinkometer barely flickered on the AAGill 'witticism' about the "Dyke on a Bike", that comment being rather lost in the general, ah, robustness of the piece.

On the other hand the needle slammed straight across the dial when I read Parris's latest effort. He must have been out of mind writing a piece de-facto encouraging idiots to swim across the Thames at night. What next, train tunnel running? Using electrical pylon cables as death slides? The mind boggles.

You've forgotten the Sky-sponsored M25 Chicken Championships.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: dkahn400 on 02 August, 2010, 05:00:50 pm
Bunch of killjoys!

I read the column on Saturday and really enjoyed it - a tale of derring-do by an ordinary bloke.

(he's still not in my good books though, not by a long way ... )

Of course for those of us who mostly read newspapers in the sensible manner, his column is now behind a pay wall. Oh well, never mind.

Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Asterix, the former Gaul. on 02 August, 2010, 07:41:10 pm
They've no sense of fun.

Mind you, I've lost count of the number of times I've been present at a tide-table balls-up.  Best of all was at the Corryvreckan.  Whirlpool.  Of DEATH.

I've been through that, twice.  Get the tides right and it's a pussy cat.  In fact we spent the night half-way through as there is a small very sheltered anchorage.  We went ashore and sat high above the swirling waters and listened to the seals howling.  It was quite spooky.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: hellymedic on 02 August, 2010, 07:59:22 pm
Darwin?

Does Darwinism apply to gay 60-year-olds?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Bledlow on 03 August, 2010, 12:47:29 am
You talking genes or memes?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: andygates on 03 August, 2010, 09:15:45 am
Common-sense doesn't apply to memes if their other properties are strong enough.  Vide Raoul Moat memorial tattoos.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: simonp on 03 August, 2010, 10:39:13 am
They've no sense of fun.

Mind you, I've lost count of the number of times I've been present at a tide-table balls-up.  Best of all was at the Corryvreckan.  Whirlpool.  Of DEATH.

Heh.  We cocked up in the Dorus Mor tidal race not through arithmetic, but through over-sleeping.  It was like being a cork in a bath due to wind against tide.  At least we didn't lose power and get carried on into the Corryvwreckan. :)
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: andygates on 03 August, 2010, 11:06:59 am
Yeep!

We just couldn't make any headway - the upwelling craziness killed our steering (woo! spinny!) and after a few minutes of "hey, this is wrong..." we decided to turn tail, moor up and have another gin while considering options. :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Regulator on 03 August, 2010, 11:20:24 am
I can't believe I'm doing this - but I feel that I have to defend Mr Parris.

OK - he's a knob, but frankly the idea that you shouldn't be able to swim in the Thames (or across the Thames) is daft.  The PLA spokesperson is being a bit of a spoilsport knob.

Frankly, we should be reclaiming our rivers and streams just as we are reclaiming our roads.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: mattc on 03 August, 2010, 11:35:09 am
Holy cr@p - I'm defending Parris, AND agreeing with Greg!

I need a lie-down ... ;)
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: meddyg on 03 August, 2010, 11:44:41 am
My daughter's college friends did the Danumbe in Buda-pest on a summer's night. They forgot about the tidal effect and ended up a  mile further downstream in Pest. You're not sipposed to do this in the Hungarian capital either. Running back to the hotel in wet underwear was the second part of the challenge.

But hey - that's Brits abroad - and great f you survive

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCV25g6K1P4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCV25g6K1P4)
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Manotea on 03 August, 2010, 11:45:18 am
Frankly, we should be reclaiming our rivers and streams just as we are reclaiming our roads.

What Parris did was the equivalent of a night time ride along an unlit section of the M25 dressed entirely in black with no lights on his bike, said motorway including numerous unmarked roadworks and hefty pieces of debris.

Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Manotea on 03 August, 2010, 11:55:33 am
My daughter's college friends did the Danumbe in Buda-pest on a summer's night. They forgot about the tidal effect and ended up a  mile further downstream in Pest. You're not sipposed to do this in the Hungarian capital either. Running back to the hotel in wet underwear was the second part of the challenge.

But hey - that's Brits abroad - and great f you survive

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCV25g6K1P4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCV25g6K1P4)

I've seen folk 'Tubing' (riding car tyres) in the Rhine through Basel, which looked great fun in a rather iffy sort of way. My local friend dismissed them as nutters and muttered scornfully about eddy's from the bridge supports, barges and Weil's Disease.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Adrian on 03 August, 2010, 12:00:07 pm
I can't believe I'm doing this - but I feel that I have to defend Mr Parris.

OK - he's a knob, but frankly the idea that you shouldn't be able to swim in the Thames (or across the Thames) is daft.  The PLA spokesperson is being a bit of a spoilsport knob.

Frankly, we should be reclaiming our rivers and streams just as we are reclaiming our roads.

I agree with this as well. It was the not knowing the difference between BST and GMT, compounded by just not noticing that the water wasn't slack, which made this look like knobbery to me.
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: Greenbank on 03 August, 2010, 02:21:19 pm
Quote
The Port of London Authority's Mr Snelson said the Thames in London was "lethal".

I'm surprised he, and his friend, survived if that's the case.

Maybe he wanted to say "literally lethal"?
Title: Re: Matthew Parris being a bit of a knob
Post by: itsbruce on 03 August, 2010, 02:28:52 pm
Maybe he wanted to say "literally lethal"?

To give us something to complain about in the grammar thread, you mean?