Author Topic: Sh!te courier thread  (Read 143213 times)

Andrij

  • Андрій
  • Ερασιτεχνικός μισάνθρωπος
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #250 on: 29 December, 2016, 11:16:46 am »
Royal Fail.

I saw the postie arrive on my street.  I knew he had a small (tracked) package for me.  So what do I find at the front door?  The dreaded red card with a box ticked for "too large for your letter box".  I was home the entire time, the downstairs neighbours were in the entire time, but I get a card instead of package.  Looks like I'm off to the local (10 min. walk) sorting office first thing tomorrow morning.

This isn't the first time something like this has happened, but today is the first time I've formally complained.

The next five hours will be spent waiting for Yodel.  Knowing my luck, they'll attempt delivery after I've headed into town later this afternoon.
;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

ElyDave

  • Royal and Ancient Polar Bear Society member 263583
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #251 on: 10 January, 2017, 12:07:04 pm »
Parcel Farce

new work stand, dispatched on the 4th, at their depot on the 6th.  Supposed delivery attempt yesterday, was it b@ll@ck$, I was in all day except for 10 minutes when I went to the village post office, at which point the wife was in because we have tradesmen at present.
 
Supposedly now out for delivery again.
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #252 on: 10 January, 2017, 01:04:24 pm »
So I got a text yesterday to say my new iPhone would be delivered by DPD tomorrow (11th) so I arranged a day working from home. Got a text this morning saying it would be delivered today (11th sic) between 11 and 12. Replied to text deferring delivery to tomorrow (11th sic).

Got a phone call at 11.30 from SWMBO (who was coincidentally not meant to be WfH today!!) to say my phone had been delivered but that the driver was confused and thought he had another parcel to deliver tomorrow.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #253 on: 10 January, 2017, 06:34:23 pm »
Parcel Farce

new work stand, dispatched on the 4th, at their depot on the 6th.  Supposed delivery attempt yesterday, was it b@ll@ck$, I was in all day except for 10 minutes when I went to the village post office, at which point the wife was in because we have tradesmen at present.
 
Supposedly now out for delivery again.

Partner ordered Stuffs from Thomann in Germany just before Christmas.
Tracking stated package was 'Out For Delivery' on Saturday 24 December. Nothing arrived.
We did not leave place until 28 December and package was 'Out for Delivery' over the Bank Holidays but unsurprisingly, nothing arrived.
Left house at 13.30 28 December for 3 days with His Dad.

Package gets delivered to neighbour in our absence.

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #254 on: 24 January, 2017, 10:35:10 am »
Order stuffs from xkcd. Get email saying here is a USPS tracking number. Watch as stuffs get closer and closer. Logon today to see after arriving Stansted a few days ago, dallying in Heathrow after that, that:

Quote
Your item departed from an intermediate transfer airport in COLOGNE/BONN, COLOGNE, GERMANY

What would Randall have to say?
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #255 on: 25 January, 2017, 08:00:02 am »
Order stuffs from xkcd. Get email saying here is a USPS tracking number. Watch as stuffs get closer and closer. Logon today to see after arriving Stansted a few days ago, dallying in Heathrow after that, that:

Quote
Your item departed from an intermediate transfer airport in COLOGNE/BONN, COLOGNE, GERMANY

What would Randall have to say?
And today it has just departed Malmo. That's Malmo, Sweden.
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #256 on: 25 January, 2017, 04:24:45 pm »
Order stuffs from xkcd. Get email saying here is a USPS tracking number. Watch as stuffs get closer and closer. Logon today to see after arriving Stansted a few days ago, dallying in Heathrow after that, that:

Quote
Your item departed from an intermediate transfer airport in COLOGNE/BONN, COLOGNE, GERMANY

What would Randall have to say?
And today it has just departed Malmo. That's Malmo, Sweden.

You couldn't molish it up!

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #257 on: 25 January, 2017, 05:36:43 pm »
Order stuffs from xkcd. Get email saying here is a USPS tracking number. Watch as stuffs get closer and closer. Logon today to see after arriving Stansted a few days ago, dallying in Heathrow after that, that:

Quote
Your item departed from an intermediate transfer airport in COLOGNE/BONN, COLOGNE, GERMANY

What would Randall have to say?
And today it has just departed Malmo. That's Malmo, Sweden.

You couldn't molish it up!

And now:
Quote
Your item was processed through a facility in UNITED KINGDOM on January 25, 2017 at 1:15 pm. The item is currently in transit to the destination.
Will it arrive in time for The Boy's birthday (Friday), or will he just get a card with a printout of where his present went on its holidays?
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #258 on: 27 January, 2017, 12:12:12 pm »
Order stuffs from xkcd. Get email saying here is a USPS tracking number. Watch as stuffs get closer and closer. Logon today to see after arriving Stansted a few days ago, dallying in Heathrow after that, that:

Quote
Your item departed from an intermediate transfer airport in COLOGNE/BONN, COLOGNE, GERMANY

What would Randall have to say?
And today it has just departed Malmo. That's Malmo, Sweden.

You couldn't molish it up!

And now:
Quote
Your item was processed through a facility in UNITED KINGDOM on January 25, 2017 at 1:15 pm. The item is currently in transit to the destination.
Will it arrive in time for The Boy's birthday (Friday), or will he just get a card with a printout of where his present went on its holidays?

And the answer was...he got a card with a printout of the tracking info.

However, looking at the tracking website this morning it shows the item as delivered at 04:19.  Not delivered here it wasn't.  I suspect it means delivered in to the tender care of Royal Mail, but who knows?
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #259 on: 27 January, 2017, 12:49:00 pm »
And the answer was...he got a card with a printout of the tracking info.

Randall might like the idea of a well toured item.

I'm now wondering how you could dress this up into an xkcd-like comic, or even a suitable What If question...
"Yes please" said Squirrel "biscuits are our favourite things."

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
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    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #260 on: 16 February, 2017, 05:13:43 pm »
"Estimated delivery: Thursday February 16, 2017" says DHL's webby SCIENCE.

Doesn't seem very likely, what with it having been sat in Leipzig all sodding day >:(
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #261 on: 13 March, 2017, 10:31:18 pm »
Parcel from Evans, entrusted to Hermes, out for delivery today.
Quote from: Hermes Parcel Tracking
13/03/2017   12:39   Delivered to reception
Who knew that a perfectly ordinary residential address had a reception service?

Did I find a card on the doormat when I got home? Why, no. No, I did not.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #262 on: 15 March, 2017, 11:47:55 pm »
This could be a monster thread!

It is...

David Martin

  • Thats Dr Oi You thankyouverymuch
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #263 on: 03 May, 2017, 08:46:51 am »
We are in the process of having the church renovated (a once in a lifetime major refit). Some of the lighting arrived yesterday. Courier turns up to the Manse. 'It says "Church" on the address, please take it round the front of the church where there will be someone waiting to help you'. The manse is adjacent to the church. Ten minutes later and person at front of church says "Where is the courier?". Turns out he had dumped all the parcels in the contractor container (doors wide open) and made off. Nothing signed for - over £10k of lighting equipment untracked. Fortunately it did all tally with what the company had sent, but someone will be getting a stern talking to.

The joys of the gig economy.
"By creating we think. By living we learn" - Patrick Geddes

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #264 on: 03 May, 2017, 03:09:08 pm »
We are in the process of having the church renovated (a once in a lifetime major refit). Some of the lighting arrived yesterday. Courier turns up to the Manse. 'It says "Church" on the address, please take it round the front of the church where there will be someone waiting to help you'. The manse is adjacent to the church. Ten minutes later and person at front of church says "Where is the courier?". Turns out he had dumped all the parcels in the contractor container (doors wide open) and made off. Nothing signed for - over £10k of lighting equipment untracked. Fortunately it did all tally with what the company had sent, but someone will be getting a stern talking to.

The joys of the gig economy.

[Expletives deleted]

fuzzy

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #265 on: 03 May, 2017, 03:46:45 pm »
DPD courier arrives at the school to do a drop.

Another visitor complains about the DPD driver who cut them up at the entrance to the school, nearly coliding with them.

I talk to DPD driver and explain that if he isn't careful, he will be barred from the site, this banning being enforced by a call to his depot to let them know he is no longer allowed on the grounds.

DPD eejit "Hang on- how do you know it was me? Theres another DPD driver just coming in. It wasn't me it was him" at which point another DPD van arrives at the school.

Fuzzy "I know it was you because a) you were the only DPD van on site when the complaint was raised and b) You are driving the blue DPD van with the registration *******. The other van is red and th wrong registration. Slow down and drive safe please Sir."

DPD eejit leaves the school at a sedate pace, stopping only to direct death glares at the vehicle and driver who complained about him. I wonder how he knew who complained? :facepalm:




rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #266 on: 05 May, 2017, 06:21:16 pm »
APC, who won't deliver on Saturday and don't tell you when their depot is open.  Spa Cycles use them.
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

woollypigs

  • Mr Peli
    • woollypigs
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #267 on: 06 May, 2017, 01:24:04 pm »
Yesterday's no show of my parcel, caused Yodel to upgrade their tracking tool, after I moaned via their chatting tool. So now I can see how many parcels there is before mine will be delivered. At this rate I would need a new keyboard as I hammer F5 into DETH.
Current mood: AARRRGGGGHHHHH !!! #bollockstobrexit

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #268 on: 06 May, 2017, 01:32:30 pm »
APC, who won't deliver on Saturday and don't tell you when their depot is open.  Spa Cycles use them.

Ooh, that's interesting. Spa Cycles sent a parcel to The Boy, which arrived today (Saturday). They used Royal Mail.  I expect it's a size of parcel issue.
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

rogerzilla

  • When n+1 gets out of hand
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #269 on: 06 May, 2017, 06:16:16 pm »
It wasn't that big - it had a pair of dropped bars in it.  The depot was open until 12 so I drove up there after my ride.  They don't seem to get nany visitors.
Hard work sometimes pays off in the end, but laziness ALWAYS pays off NOW.

mcshroom

  • Mushroom
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #270 on: 13 May, 2017, 10:54:30 am »
I'm currently waiting for the postie to try and do a 'card and dash' with one of my parcels.

I actually have the parcel as I happened it from the sorting office just now along with three others that aren't tracked, one of which I got a card for a couple days ago. However according to the tracking system my parcel arrived at the delivery office at 06:42 this morning, and was logged as "NO ANSWER - NOT AVAILABLE FOR COLLECTION" at 06:57 this morning.

I'm in today, waiting until Monday will both make it awkward to collect before work and also mean I can't fettle the bike today (new shiny bits).

I'm intending to keep the tracked parcel by the door, then catch them and ask them to deliver it when they turn up, which should be interesting :demon:
Climbs like a sprinter, sprints like a climber!

Wowbagger

  • Former Sylph
    • Stuff mostly about weather
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #271 on: 12 June, 2017, 08:56:57 am »
Aaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!

Bromptons are in Avignon at campsite. Courier calls between 12 and 1.30 to collect. Campsite's reception closes at 12. Courier leaves without bikes.

GOTO Aaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!
Quote from: Dez
It doesn’t matter where you start. Just start.

Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #272 on: 11 October, 2017, 09:11:42 pm »
Herpes. Just don't.

Hermes / myHermes are quite possibly the worst courier company out there.

Quote
Ham: When you say "Address query" that means it didn't make it to the door
Supervisor: Yes, this means the courier could not find the address. This can be for myriad reasons
Ham: mmmmm. One reason and one reason only - incompetence

Something like the 7th attempt at delivery (allegedly)

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #273 on: 11 October, 2017, 09:43:08 pm »
Aaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!

Bromptons are in Avignon at campsite. Courier calls between 12 and 1.30 to collect. Campsite's reception closes at 12. Courier leaves without bikes.

GOTO Aaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!

Did they ever get repatriated?

Guy

  • Retired
Re: Sh!te courier thread
« Reply #274 on: 19 October, 2017, 09:40:57 am »
The latest in a series of emails from a colleague..

Quote
Good afternoon All,

Once again APC has surpassed themselves. Turned up twice and the queue was too long so has left!!

He/she is now due to come tomorrow afternoon. I am going to meet them at the guardroom and take my parcel, unless it is too big for my car and they will have to get booked in, I will be with them to vouch for them, and drive round!

Don’t you just love them?

This has been going on for over a week!
"The Opinion of 10,000 men is of no value if none of them know anything about the subject"  Marcus Aurelius