Author Topic: TdeF 2016 (Contains spoilers) (Read 60111 times)

woollypigs · « **Reply #475 on:** 22 July, 2016, 03:57:18 pm »

Oh that's gotta smart ..

TigaSefi · « **Reply #476 on:** 22 July, 2016, 04:00:19 pm »

Crashes!! Crashes everywhere!!!

Borrowing bikes, Borrowing bikes everywhere!!

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #477 on:** 22 July, 2016, 04:46:49 pm »

Is A Yates a midget or is it just the blonde podium girl is 9' tall and thus in danger of finding herself accidentally married to Rod Stewart?

simonp · « **Reply #478 on:** 22 July, 2016, 04:48:44 pm »

Midget.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #479 on:** 22 July, 2016, 05:17:50 pm »

D Friebe:	O hai! I am TV's D Friebe and I am speaking 2 ~~I Montoya~~ N Quintana. O hai, ~~I Montoya~~ N Quintana, u haz any idearz how 2 attack teh C Froome in teh mountainz?
N Quintana:	Got any cocaine?
D Friebe:	No. No, I haz not!
N Quintana:	How about a motorbike?
D Friebe:	No. Not one of them either.
N Quintana:	Piss!
	[Later...]
SD Millar:	O hai! I am TV's Super D Millar! When Mr. and Mrs. Ramsbottom had their last garden party I was amongst teh guests, who had a welcome true and hearty. Teh Prince of Wales was also there and my heart jumped with glee when someone said teh prince would like to have a word with me!
TPO Wales:	O hai! One is teh Prince ov Wales and one is made of teh Win! Where did u get that hat?
Omnes:	Well said, TPO Wales! Roffle @ SD Millar! U look like a refugee from a Rubettes tribute band!
SD Millar:	Your all gay!
	[Later...]
TD Gendt:	O hai! I am TD Gendt and I am made of teh Win! C me make teh vainglorious acceleration on one ov teh 900 Cols de la Forclaz! Move teh biek! 4 grate justiec!
R Majka:	O hai, TD Gendt! U sure ur on teh right Col de la Forclaz? U haz no chance to take teh spottyjumper make ur time!
TD Gendt:	Arse!
	[Meanwhile...]
T Astana:	`O HAI! WE R TEAM AS-TA-NA AND WE ARE MADE OF TEH DOC-TOR FER-RA-RI'S AS-TA-NA BEANZ! WE WILL EX-TER-MIN-ATE TEH OP-PO-SI-TION 4 TEH F A-RU!`
D Rosa:	`SLO DOWN U GITS! U HAZ EX-TER-MIN-ATED MY KNEEZ!`
A Grivko:	`GET TAE FCK, D RO-SA!`
	[Later...]
TP Fairy:	O hai! I am teh Pnctr* F**ry and I am teh very embodiment of teh FAIL! Whom shall I torment today, eh? O hai, A Yates! Stab stabbity stabbee!!1!
A Yates:	You utter git, TP Fairy¹!
TV Garderen:	Don't try to engage my enthusiasm, because I haven't got one...
	[Meanwhile, up the Montée de Pissoir...]
R Majka:	Bai, TD Gendt! LOL!!1!
TD Gendt:	Piss!
	[Quite a lot later...]
R Majka:	Yay! Teh spottyjumper iz mine ALL MINE!
LL Sanchez:	`LOU-IE, LEE-O, OH NO-ES! ME GOT-TA GO! AYE-YI-YI!` [Disappears backwards @ teh rate ov knots]
P Rolland:	Ow! That hurts! Get tae fck, TV cameras!
*** Boulting:	O hai! I am TV's *** Boulting and teh Moriarty haz struck again!
SD Millar:	Don't get it, ***
*** Boulting:	Elementary, my dear ~~Watson~~ Millar! Reichenbach falls²!
	[Not very much later...]
R Porte:	O hai clouds o hai sky o hai road! Piss!
B Mollema:	O hai clouds o hai sky o hai road! Piss!
C Froome:	O hai clouds o hai sky o hai road! Piss!
V Nibbles:	O hai clouds o hai sky o hai road o hai C Froome! Piss!
	[Shortly thereafter...]
W Poels:	O hai, C Froome! It's two kilometres to St-Gervais Mont-Blanc. We gotta full bidon of Vittel, half a box of energy gels, it's raining and we're wearing sunglasses!
C Froome:	Hit it! Actually, don't bother.
ML Maire:	Bloody crashes, spoiling teh Black & Blues Brothers gag!
R Bardet:	O hai! I am R Bardet and I am made of teh Win! Better l8 than never, eh, readers?
F Aru:	`O NO-ES! EX-TER-MIN-ATED! PISS!`
A Yates:	Even teh juniorshinyjumper not maek up 4 that! Arse!

1: Might not haz been TP Fairy, but saves typing.
2: If *** won't nick teh Spesh's joak then I'll have to.

spesh · « **Reply #480 on:** 22 July, 2016, 05:27:40 pm »

Immortan Joe: *** Boulting missed teh Moriaty gag again? MEDIOCRE!!!

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #481 on:** 22 July, 2016, 05:30:48 pm »

He even commented on Reichenbach being one of the fallers

spesh · « **Reply #482 on:** 22 July, 2016, 05:33:40 pm »

2nd funniest thing after yet another Larrington Production was Astana using practically their entire team to achieve the square root of Sweet F. Aru.

citoyen · « **Reply #483 on:** 22 July, 2016, 05:45:14 pm »

Quote from: spesh on 22 July, 2016, 05:27:40 pm

Immortan Joe: *** Boulting missed teh Moriaty gag again? MEDIOCRE!!!

To be fair, he probably deliberately avoided making the gag, seeing as approximately several million other Wits Of The Internet were already on the case.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #484 on:** 22 July, 2016, 06:11:15 pm »

It appears Biff otp managed to do the Reichenbach Falls one during the 2013 Worlds

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #485 on:** 22 July, 2016, 07:16:47 pm »

I've only just noticed that Team ~~Dalek~~ Astana contains both a Kangert and Aru.

Tim Hall · « **Reply #486 on:** 22 July, 2016, 11:40:24 pm »

Whilst imbibing coffee and eating bread pudding at silly o'clock last Saturday morning, Adrian, sometime OTP, advised me that Aru should be pronounced inna Warren Zevon stylee, followed by 'Werewolves of London'. I commend it to the house.

hatler · « **Reply #487 on:** 23 July, 2016, 06:59:21 am »

My take on Adrian's comment was that he couldn't hear anyone mention Aru without his mentally following up with "werewolves of London" in a singing stylee.

Seconded.

Whatever, following that chat I too find myself in exactly the same position.

mattc · « **Reply #488 on:** 23 July, 2016, 07:22:52 am »

Quote from: Mr Larrington on 22 July, 2016, 09:40:29 am

G Thomas interviewed by TV's M Rendall after the Curious Incident of the Pole in the Daytime¹.

1: May contain traces of W Barguil.

I havent seen it, but apparently he followed this up yesterday:

"after the team car drove straight past me, I thought I was going to have to run to the finish."

T42 · « **Reply #489 on:** 23 July, 2016, 07:51:57 am »

What a riot of laffs UK TV seems to be. We just had a bunch of FdJ blokes hugging the minister of sport and having a good cry.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #490 on:** 23 July, 2016, 11:58:55 am »

Quote from: T42 on 23 July, 2016, 07:51:57 am

What a riot of laffs UK TV seems to be. We just had a bunch of FdJ blokes hugging the minister of sport and having a good cry.

We BRITONS used to have to suffer from the Liggett & Sherwen Show, which was as much a part of the BRITSH summer as rain-delayed Test Matches, BRITONS getting dumped out of the first round of Wmbldn by unknown Peruvians and people expecting train operating companies to change the laws of physics but things have improved this year, and not just A Murray triumphing in SW19. *** Boulting has always been an amusing chap, especially when paired with Evil¹ C Boardman, but Super D Millar has come on by leaps and bounds since his first attempts in the comm box a year or two ago on the Tour de Yorkshire. If someone could tactfully tell him not to bother with the hats...

Cracking ride by R Bardet yesterday, though, keeping his head when all around were losing theirs.

1: There are two C Boardmen; the good one who speaks calmly and with great authority on Matters Pertaining to Cycling as a Whole and the evil one who makes his son get into a 100' deep pit full of ice-cold water.

woollypigs · « **Reply #491 on:** 23 July, 2016, 12:05:38 pm »

I agree that Super D Millar is great to have as a commentator, quick and knows what is going on - on the ball as they say. But when he does his pre-recorded stuff he need to pick up the pace and enthusiaZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz... oh did I just nod off there ... what was I saying, oh yes ... he sounds rather borZZZZZzzzzzzz... oh there I went again ... as you were.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #492 on:** 23 July, 2016, 12:06:59 pm »

He's wearing that flat cap again today, the one which looks like it's made from an offcut of a Dralon^TM sofa

T42 · « **Reply #493 on:** 23 July, 2016, 01:28:26 pm »

Rats. Missed them going over the Col des Aravis, which I dun in 2007. Was heading for the Colombière as well but it starting pissing down and the missus & her Da were there so we had a tartiflette in the restaurant and bought a cow-bell for our cleaning-lady-person.

Fun watching Movistar guy trying to put on K-Way while going uphill round a car at front of peloton. Otherwise dozeworthy. Bandwidth on France TV's streaming site is crap.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #494 on:** 23 July, 2016, 03:04:12 pm »

Poor ~~dead~~ B Mollema and his nose appear to be having another really shit day

Edit: And by the end of that set of blipverts he's caught up

Ruthie · « **Reply #495 on:** 23 July, 2016, 04:08:07 pm »

Pantano needs to change his name.

Riding in the torrential rain? I can relate!

TimC · « **Reply #496 on:** 23 July, 2016, 04:12:39 pm »

What a descent! That was bloody exciting - I bet the moto riders had their hearts in their mouths!

Ruthie · « **Reply #497 on:** 23 July, 2016, 04:13:35 pm »

Quote from: TimC on 23 July, 2016, 04:12:39 pm

What a descent! That was bloody exciting - I bet the moto riders had their hearts in their mouths!

I think we all did after yesterday!

TimC · « **Reply #498 on:** 23 July, 2016, 04:17:11 pm »

Dave Brailsford was behind the Death Star's sofa the whole way down!

Jaded · « **Reply #499 on:** 23 July, 2016, 04:23:45 pm »

That was fun. Especially being able to shout "I was in that shop last year!!" when they went through Samoens.

Author Topic: TdeF 2016 (Contains spoilers) (Read 60111 times)

simonp