Author Topic: more insane management speak phrases  (Read 144176 times)

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #625 on: 12 June, 2019, 04:34:18 pm »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
Wow what a bunch of has-beens.

AI is so last decade.

<i>Marmite slave</i>

TheLurker

  • Goes well with magnolia.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #626 on: 12 June, 2019, 05:15:42 pm »
AI is so last decade.
Given the rate at which old ideas get recycled as "new", "shiny" and "magic" in our particular trade I expect it's either back at the cutting edge now or will be in about 20 femtoseconds and back out of fashion a dozen or so nanoseconds after that. 

The rag trade can't even come close to IT for fickleness.
Τα πιο όμορφα ταξίδια γίνονται με τις δικές μας δυνάμεις - Φίλοι του Ποδήλατου

ian

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #627 on: 12 June, 2019, 08:13:09 pm »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
Wow what a bunch of has-beens.

AI is so last decade.

Next you'll be telling me that it's wrong to make my development squad wear silver spandex one-piece suits?

That said, they required surprisingly little encouragement.

fuzzy

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #628 on: 12 June, 2019, 11:28:59 pm »
The term Artificial Intelligence has always amused me. It suggests that the boffins are saying that the machine intelligence is fake......

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #629 on: 12 June, 2019, 11:31:01 pm »
Donald Trump has Artificial Intelligence.
It is simpler than it looks.

Kim

  • Timelord
    • Fediverse
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #630 on: 12 June, 2019, 11:31:36 pm »
The term Artificial Intelligence has always amused me. It suggests that the boffins are saying that the machine intelligence is fake......

As a one-time boffin with a little experience in the subject, this seems entirely reasonable to me.

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #631 on: 13 June, 2019, 08:46:26 am »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
Wow what a bunch of has-beens.

AI is so last decade.

Next you'll be telling me that it's wrong to make my development squad wear silver spandex one-piece suits?

That said, they required surprisingly little encouragement.
Your suit is gold, right?
<i>Marmite slave</i>

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #632 on: 13 June, 2019, 09:09:57 am »

Quote
... parameters and rules that, together, define, encode and clarify the relationship between design intent and design response.

Yu wat now?

There's a relationship?


HTFB

  • The Monkey and the Plywood Violin
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #633 on: 13 June, 2019, 10:54:34 am »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
When you're selling it, it's Artificial Intelligence. When you're seeking a budget for the computers, it's Machine Learning. When you're doing it, it's linear regression.
Not especially helpful or mature

ian

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #634 on: 13 June, 2019, 11:20:47 am »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
When you're selling it, it's Artificial Intelligence. When you're seeking a budget for the computers, it's Machine Learning. When you're doing it, it's linear regression.

This is actually exact. The data science minion says linear regression model, I put it down as machine learning and trained algorithms, and sales and marketing pitch artificial intelligence.

We've moved from silver spandex to gold? Really, I get tired just looking at that curve. This boy don't sprint, he ambles.

menthel

  • Jim is my real, actual name
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #635 on: 13 June, 2019, 11:29:42 am »
I am currently enjoying being "transformed". Sadly this doesn't give me Optimus Prime like abilities, rather free time where work time used to be...

ian

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #636 on: 13 June, 2019, 11:33:35 am »
We have a business transformation initiative which, I admit, does feel a bit like being stuck in the middle of one those six-hour long Transformer movies. If, instead of filming it, they'd done the entire thing with PowerPoint and Excel.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
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Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #637 on: 13 June, 2019, 12:56:14 pm »
I started to use 'machine learning' (we do, oh we do) but they told me it wasn't sexy enough and to use 'artificial intelligence' instead.

This curve is too steep to climb.
Wow what a bunch of has-beens.

AI is so last decade.

Last decade?  "AI" as a term stopped being hip around 1980 when SAIL was merged into Stanford's main Babbage-Science department.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #638 on: 17 June, 2019, 12:38:06 pm »
'C'mon guys, I can't ride two horses with one arse.'
Hear all, see all, say nowt

Andrij

  • Андрій
  • Ερασιτεχνικός μισάνθρωπος
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #639 on: 28 June, 2019, 09:04:24 pm »


;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #640 on: 14 August, 2019, 11:07:12 pm »
Spotted elsewhere:
Quote
unrealised ancillary revenue passes by because of manual, fragmented legacy processes
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #641 on: 05 March, 2020, 05:59:19 pm »
today, I got a round of applause in the office.

Synergies. I used the word synergies in a sentence and I wasn't taking the piss.

Well, only a little bit.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #642 on: 05 March, 2020, 06:15:30 pm »
A round of applause is the ultimate in synergy.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #643 on: 05 March, 2020, 08:28:25 pm »
Y?

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #644 on: 08 April, 2020, 05:38:41 pm »
Not insane phrases, just new (at least to me): a "Nike swoosh shaped downturn" and "reshoring".
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #645 on: 08 April, 2020, 05:49:09 pm »
That last one is crap. It should be either onshoring or restoring.
Rust never sleeps

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #646 on: 08 April, 2020, 05:49:40 pm »
Or even "un-offshoring"  :-)
Rust never sleeps

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #647 on: 08 April, 2020, 06:10:26 pm »
IIRC it was used to indicate a temporary as opposed to permanent transfer of manufacture from China/East Asia to Europe and N.America.
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #648 on: 08 April, 2020, 07:38:11 pm »
It is now joined by "the wheelbarrow recovery". I don't think this means it has wheels!
https://theconversation.com/coronavirus-the-economic-recovery-wont-only-be-u-shaped-itll-look-like-a-wheelbarrow-135969
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

Re: more insane management speak phrases
« Reply #649 on: 08 April, 2020, 08:13:20 pm »
Does a wheelbarrow recovery mean inflation so high you'll need a wheelbarrow to carry all the money needed to buy food, as in the Weimar Republic in the 1920s?