Author Topic: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)  (Read 2469999 times)

Mrs Pingu

  • Who ate all the pies? Me
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Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23600 on: 25 April, 2022, 09:57:29 pm »
I get so many emails, which are meant for a bloke in procurement in the US with the same first initial and surname as me, but a different email address.
Maybe they are just guessing at his email address and getting mine, but an evil part of me can't help thinking he's given them an email address that sounds like it could be his, but isn't. And it turns out to be mine, the bastard.
Do not clench. It only makes it worse.

cygnet

  • I'm part of the association
Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23601 on: 25 April, 2022, 10:39:13 pm »
PR fuckwit, sending me a terse email with just the words "Did you get my emails?" is not the way to elicit a favourable response.  >:(

Perhaps if you spent more time targeting your emails at the right people in the first place, you would then have to spend less time following them up to find out why you're not getting an answer.

Now just fuck off and do something more useful with your worthless life, like dunking your head in a vat of boiling oil.

I occasionally get passive-aggressive sales stuff

ian, would you be interested in trialling our super-new data analysis platform.
[silence, but no, I'm not]
Are you sure? It's super! It's new! It does data analysis in a way that you've never experienced.
[silence, I am sure]
All your competitors have signed up!
[silence, I am sure they haven't]
We can't keep making this offer.
[silence, feel free to stop then]
This is your last chance.
[silence, I doubt it]
This is a good faith offer. We're not sure why you wouldn't respond.
[silence, because I get eight of these a week]
This is absolutely your last chance. We won't offer this again.
[silence, I hope not]
This is your loss and your competitors' gain. I hope you are happy with your decision not to engage with us.
[silence, oh go get in the sea]

I'm not sure this sales technique is as effectively they may have thought.

You might as well change your name to Margret and be done with it.
Reasonably Inconsiderate

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23602 on: 26 April, 2022, 09:27:50 am »
But my rant. HSBC. Again. Why is it impossible for me to set up a standing order to a company on your useless website? Individuals, yep, no problem. Any company - my council (wanted to set up this year's council tax), credit cards (just testing to see if they worked) etc. - you don't even get the switch to flip to enable standing orders, just a single date. WTF? I'd ask in your online chat, but it doesn't work on Chrome for me. And your site is painfully slow in Firefox.

Having got through to someone on the phone (as the online chat person couldn't help), apparently it is actually impossible - when the phone person looked into it, they have a note saying they have to set them up manually if the company is one that is listed on their system (so all councils, major utilities, large businesses etc). So they only way to set up a standing order to a company is to dictate the details to someone who will type them in - but it will allow you to do it for individuals. Thinking back a couple of years, MrsH hit this issue - and set one up over the phone. But they did it from the wrong account, which is rarely used, so immediately went into unauthorised overdraft with charges applied. That was eventually resolved and compensation paid, but I'd rather the system worked.

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23603 on: 26 April, 2022, 10:02:36 am »
TransBloodyPennineExpress.   Sort your online system out.  I can't reset my password which means I can't give you money for tickets.  >:(
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23604 on: 26 April, 2022, 11:10:08 am »
I had to speak with six people at LB Southwark earlier today before I could find someone who could give me the telephone number for the cafe in Southwark Park.

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23605 on: 26 April, 2022, 12:33:51 pm »
I had to speak with six people at LB Southwark earlier today before I could find someone who could give me the telephone number for the cafe in Southwark Park.

Might have been quicker to message the cafe on Farcebook?
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

citoyen

  • Occasionally rides a bike
The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23606 on: 26 April, 2022, 12:44:43 pm »
Since the office redesign, my desk neighbour is a chap who wears his headphones all day, which is antisocial enough, but made worse by the fact that he has the volume loud enough for the sound to leak.

Plus he types like a tap-dancing elephant. (Seriously, dude, you really don’t need to hit the keys that hard.)

And he eats apples noisily at his desk.

And he wears a hat indoors.

In short, he’s a cunt.

Oh well, only two more office days to put up with him. Silver linings and all that.
"The future's all yours, you lousy bicycles."

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23607 on: 26 April, 2022, 01:15:52 pm »
The real silver lining is that apples aren't fish.

citoyen

  • Occasionally rides a bike
Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23608 on: 26 April, 2022, 02:34:43 pm »
The real silver lining is that apples aren't fish.

FPWM
"The future's all yours, you lousy bicycles."

TheLurker

  • Goes well with magnolia.
Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23609 on: 26 April, 2022, 04:15:44 pm »
Quote from: citoyen
And he wears a hat indoors.
Come the winter and the next round of fuel price hikes everyone will be wearing hats indoors, not just us bald skinny blokes with poor thermoregulation.
Τα πιο όμορφα ταξίδια γίνονται με τις δικές μας δυνάμεις - Φίλοι του Ποδήλατου

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23610 on: 29 April, 2022, 09:35:34 am »
There is a discount scheme on flights for island residents. Reduces very expensive flights (Stornoway - Edinburgh, a 1hr flight, is £128) to just extortionate.

I used it in early April.

Just tried to book flights for June "e-voucher not recognised". So I phone the office. "Due to covid restrictions, the office is closed. We are all working from home."

So they couldn't get the 0800 calls forwarded to skype/teams/something?  FFS
<i>Marmite slave</i>

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23611 on: 29 April, 2022, 11:49:17 am »
So they couldn't get the 0800 calls forwarded to skype/teams/something?  FFS

I don't think that's uncommon outside of tech.  In most organisations where working from home wasn't normal, the monkey who knows how to reconfigure the phone system was too busy scrounging up laptops and wrangling VPNs and so on.  And by now everyone's used to whatever work-arounds were hastily thrown together.

I believe barakta's $ork still lacks a way of forwarding phone calls, though obviously that isn't a problem for her.  They're mostly using Teams for telephony as a result (which is of course shit).  They're also running the whole department out of one of the manager's personal OneDrive accounts, which results in regular file-locking shenanigans.

Re: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language)
« Reply #23612 on: 14 May, 2022, 10:38:48 am »
email from PlusNet "Good News! You are due a refund!"

Pardon? You overcharged me. I had to phone up to get you to correct the bill. You're going to give me back the money you should never have taken from me.

How the fuck is this "Good News"?

(yeah, I know, it could have been Virgin and it would have taken 18 months)
Quote from: tiermat
that's not science, it's semantics.