Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists

[psyclist]

I thought I'd balance the bile with a nice little tale.

Thank you for sharing. A nice uplifting read.

[JennyB]

Descending into Fintona to a accompaniment of several small yapping dogs, when a drunk at the bottom of the street looked up and shouted "Donna-Marie's cycling down the brae!", followed by a quick chorus of "She'll be coming down the mountain."  I turned left before he discovered that I wasn't actually Donna-Marie (whoever she might be).

[fimm]

"Should have had the second Wheatabix!" from a motorcyclist coming down a single track road in a big group of motorcyclists. Yes, it is a substantial hill however I am stopped to let all the oncoming traffic through, as one should...

[nuttycyclist]

Yes, "where is your bell" is code for "I'm a grumpy old git".  When pedestrians say this to me I tend to stop and discuss with them why I don't use a bell, why talking to people is (to me) more polite and also more effective and safer.

Many years ago I was in some woodland where a guided nature walk was taking place.  I knew the guide and wanted to chat, so patiently waited for the speech to finish and them move on.  Lady at the back of the group grumpily asked if I had a bell and why I wasn't ringing it.

I explained that there is no point in having a bell as motorists can't hear it, and I wasn't trying to pass the group on the track so it was a moot point anyway.  She persisted in her argument that I needed a bell  .

In the end I leaned on the AirZound button.     When she recovered herself I calmly pointed out that that was why I didn't have a bell.  Then waited for the speech to resume, and finsih, before having a pleasant chat with my friend.

[Kim]

That one usually goes:

"Where's your bell?"
"Here:" *bring-bring*
"Well, why didn't you ring it then?"
"I did."
"BloodyCyclists."

[nuttycyclist]

Kids screaming at cyclists out of car windows (presumably driven by their parents). This is now a thing in South Oxfordshire, it seems. 3x times in the last month, previously, I remember it happening only once in the preceding 5 years or so.

I suppose it's technically harmless, but it never fails to startle me. Also suggests a generational encouragement of viewing cyclists as 'fair game' for any kind of jape. That'll be fun when they learn to drive...

Cycling home from a Brighton FNRTTC some years back I had just that with the kid shouting out of the window.

Three minutes later, as I pulled up alongside the car waiting at the traffic lights, I apologised for not hearing and wondered if she wouldn't mind repeating it.  One very embarrassed 6-9 year old (I'm not good at guessing ages) and two highly amused parents trying to stifle their laughter.   Apparently <mumbled> I needed to get off and milk it </mumbled>.    I tried, but could only get water out of the bottle.

[Wowbagger]

Sometimes, I utter a cheery "Ding ding!" if someone is being a pedestrian in the sub-standard "cycle" lane that the council installed at great expense some years ago.

[Kim]

Three minutes later, as I pulled up alongside the car waiting at the traffic lights, I apologised for not hearing and wondered if she wouldn't mind repeating it.  One very embarrassed 6-9 year old (I'm not good at guessing ages) and two highly amused parents trying to stifle their laughter.   Apparently <mumbled> I needed to get off and milk it </mumbled>.    I tried, but could only get water out of the bottle.

Good to see that the younger generation are maintaining tradition, thobut.

[nuttycyclist]

"Where's your bell?"
"Here:" *bring-bring*
"Well, why didn't you ring it then?"
"I did."
"BloodyCyclists."

Alternatively, and the one that still ANNOYS me was coming over the Humber Bridge on the shared path.  I was quite happy with the view and dawdling behind the family group walking ahead of me.
DING
DING
DING
DING
DING
DING
etc
from the cyclist coming from behind.    The whole family group jumped, turned around, and gave me an earful for my rudeness in wanting to blast past.    My protest of innocence fell on deaf ears, so I took the opportunity to pass in the wake of the DING DING DING.

She then intruded on my solitude, I assume from seeing the panniers and towel drying on the rack, to question me as to where I was going.  My intention was Southend, and hers was to follow the NCN south.  Having experienced parts of that NCN I silently laughed.    To this day I still hope that she's bogged down in some gravel rut and suffering.

[Peat]

My beloved got me one of the posh Spurcycles bells as a gift.

Well made, looks lovely. Gives a glorious sustained PIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg.

The trouble is, it sounds more or less identical to the standard iPhone message notification. People reach for their pockets instead of looking around for the approaching cyclist. So i have to give it a frantic PIII-PIII-PIII-PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggg which probably makes me sound really impatient.

[Kim]

IME all ping bells sound like one or more of:

a) Something metallic being dropped on a hard surface
2) Tinnitus
iii) iThings

Unless you (or vibrations from the degrading chipseal) DING-DING-DING-DING them like a BloodyCyclist.

You're better off making bicycle noises, or using a bring-bring bell (which still sounds like an iThing, but a lot less like tinnitus).

[Duckfoot1606]

I use the DF foghorn bellow to warns idiots of my rapid approach. It’s been known to stop a car at over 20 paces, y’know.

A

[Ashaman42]

One of my bikes has a "huh-honk" clown horn and the others have bells but I tend to default to a cheery "G'day".

Of course there are always some that take offense at that but if I used the bell someone else would take offense too.

[diapsaon0]

I usually just call out 'bike passing on the right' - then thank people if they make way.  Stop if they don't.

[Lightning Phil]

A single ping at distance and then more as approaching if no response what so ever.  I did have someone walking down a road whom I’d pinged 5 times then when I reached her and said excuse me, asked where bell was. I said well as you didn’t hear 5 separate bell pings I thought I’d better use my voice close up so you did.

[fd3]

This thread has prompted me to fit the spacer mounted bell I bought about a year ago.  It was trickier than required as all the spacers had rusted to the fork due to having been ignored for more than 16 years ...

[L CC]

Today an oik on a bike mansplained that my gears needed adjustment.
No they fucking don't. I've been riding this bike for 8 hours already today and have determined that noise is a creak not a clatter.
I said no they're not, listen, it's creaking.
He said no, it's your gears.

I thought I was quite restrained in *not* saying fuck right off. I just tutted and rode away, rolling my eyes. He may not have seen that.

[pumpkin]

2 youths on escooters passing an open door where I work. Watched them double back and look in, seeing what might be there. Shouted there was nothing there for them. They turned around shouting KNOBHEAD BOLLOX,!!!  Didn't know if it was an insult or merely an observation but thanked them anyway.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Yesterday evening, nice wide pass, quite slow too, as I'm cycling over the M4 (or was it the M5? or the M48? So many motorway bridges in such a small space). Then some shouting of which the words are indistinguishable but the sounds and rhythm are reminiscent of the chants from fans on the TdeF and similar – and there's a bloke sitting in the back hatch of the car, the hatch is open and his legs are dangling, and he's doing this commentary as they pass me, in a vaguely foreign accent. Made me laugh muchly and very nice incident.

[Kim]

Sounds liek P@nd3m1c Pr0duckt10nzTM®

[markcjagar]

I was adjusting my bibs whilst waiting for some friends outside a shop and a woman in a passing car shouted "sorting your bollocks out there love" - I didn't really know how to respond because yes, I was...

[fd3]

This thread has prompted me to fit the spacer mounted bell I bought about a year ago.  It was trickier than required as all the spacers had rusted to the fork due to having been ignored for more than 16 years ...

Took the bike out yesterday and used the bell - something has changed as pedestrains are jumping out the way and the bell has a very nice ping.

[Mr Larrington]

Sounds liek P@nd3m1c Pr0duckt10nzTM®

Probably EO Aquitaine.  I don’t think she's quite got the hang of the 21st century yet.

[jsabine]

I was adjusting my bibs whilst waiting for some friends outside a shop and a woman in a passing car shouted "sorting your bollocks out there love" - I didn't really know how to respond because yes, I was...

"Well spotted"?
"Give me a hand then"?
"Aaah, that's better"?

[Ashaman42]

All I heard was "warble" but it didn't half make me jump. Idiots.