Author Topic: A random thread for small things that don't really warrant a thread of their own (Read 3000441 times)

ian · « **Reply #23675 on:** 18 January, 2019, 02:55:08 pm »

You'd all be surprised how devious PR and marketing firms are (actually, if you're as cynical as me, you won't be). My wife used to work for one of the bigger agencies. Proper devious they were. They also had a workplace bar with a DJ and you could order drinks to your desk and charge them direct to your salary. They also had an office chef.

Kim · « **Reply #23676 on:** 18 January, 2019, 02:57:24 pm »

Every now and then some naive young web developer ends up being employed by one and, if they manage to escape, shares their tales of horror from working on another planet...

Si S · « **Reply #23677 on:** 18 January, 2019, 04:08:36 pm »

When the departure board at Manchester Oxford Road reads 'Welcome to Blackpool North' it doesn't inspire confidence

Cudzoziemiec · « **Reply #23678 on:** 18 January, 2019, 04:12:30 pm »

Got on the wrong tardis again?

Kim · « **Reply #23679 on:** 18 January, 2019, 04:15:23 pm »

Quote from: Si S on 18 January, 2019, 04:08:36 pm

When the departure board at Manchester Oxford Road reads 'Welcome to Blackpool North' it doesn't inspire confidence

That's probably a side-effect of the reality distortion field the Fridays used to invoke a Cyclists' Special in order to escape from Blackpool last year.

Si S · « **Reply #23680 on:** 18 January, 2019, 04:23:30 pm »

to both of those

The conductor has to be the happiest announcer I've heard in a very long time.

andrewc · « **Reply #23681 on:** 18 January, 2019, 04:53:23 pm »

Quote from: andrewc on 17 January, 2019, 11:33:45 pm

https://news.sky.com/story/gangland-hitman-mark-fellows-gets-whole-life-term-for-mob-murders-11609503

This trial is now over, after 2 months, so hopefully my morning & afternoon desktop power naps won't be disturbed by the police convoy taking the bad lads between the prison & court. Usually 4 4x4's full of armed police, with the prison van in the middle & motorbikes as well, all with sirens blaring . A friend who's been away in Amsterdam for a bit sent me a text, asking if there was some sort of terrorist incident going on, as there were that many chaps with guns, helmets & body armour around when she'd gone out for a walk.

And the moral of the story is that the well prepared hit man should remove everything traceable before a job.

https://www.theverge.com/2019/1/18/18188205/garmin-data-iceman-murder-mr-big-amazon-alexa

Torslanda · « **Reply #23682 on:** 18 January, 2019, 10:42:59 pm »

Not quite the criminal mastermind he thought he was...

In other news I had one of those 'can we take two minutes of your time to rate your bank?' phone calls today. It was Friday, I was bored, so I said yes.

When it got to the 'How likely are you to recommend $bankofevil to a friend I gave them a 1.
They asked why, and I'd remembered a quote I'd seen from a Microsith survey - "You have to understand that people don't have the kind of conversation where they randomly discuss and recommend operating systems" but changed it to "banks". Click. Bzzzzzzzzz...

Beardy · « **Reply #23683 on:** 19 January, 2019, 12:54:41 am »

How rude! You willingly gave your time and they didn’t have the manners to say thank you.

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #23684 on:** 19 January, 2019, 10:42:09 am »

Quote from: spesh on 18 January, 2019, 12:44:07 pm

Quote from: ElyDave on 18 January, 2019, 10:00:02 am
I use an angry weasel to nibble away at my facial fuzz, you've seen that scene in 1984 right?

IIRC it was rats in Room 101 - you sure you're not thinking of one of Frank Zappa's album covers?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weasels_Ripped_My_Flesh#Album_cover

There was an Alan Coren-penned version of the Room 101 business in which Winston Smith was tortured with an elderly and wheezy stoat, because rats could not be had for love nor money. It's probably a metaphor for Brexit.

Mrs Pingu · « **Reply #23685 on:** 19 January, 2019, 05:02:38 pm »

You know you're a bit overdue changing your toothbrush when you start finding the bristles in your mouth

rogerzilla · « **Reply #23686 on:** 19 January, 2019, 06:08:16 pm »

Some guy on Ch5 keeps saying how impressively strong locks and aqueducts need to be to carry the weight of the barges

andytheflyer · « **Reply #23687 on:** 19 January, 2019, 06:54:12 pm »

Quote from: rogerzilla on 19 January, 2019, 06:08:16 pm

Some guy on Ch5 keeps saying how impressively strong locks and aqueducts need to be to carry the weight of the barges

He'll be the same guy that thinks that flat fish are flat because of the weight of water above them.

Wish I'd had a quid for every time I've explained the principle of effective stress to civil engineers and graduate engineering geologists over the past 40 years.....

(basically neither fish nor lock wall 'sees' the water pressure as it's self-supporting if there's water all around it).

And yes, I know, Archimedes comes into it too....

Kim · « **Reply #23688 on:** 19 January, 2019, 09:58:23 pm »

Isn't this the sort of thing people have got their head around by the time their age is into double figures, or don't children play with water, buckets, hoses, dams, sandcastles, etc. properly any more?

Beardy · « **Reply #23689 on:** 19 January, 2019, 10:00:09 pm »

It gets a bit squishy as you go deeper on scuba gear...

T42 · « **Reply #23690 on:** 20 January, 2019, 09:31:12 am »

Quote from: Mrs Pingu on 19 January, 2019, 05:02:38 pm

You know you're a bit overdue changing your toothbrush when you start finding the bristles in your mouth

You know your toothbrush is middle-aged when...

Beardy · « **Reply #23691 on:** 20 January, 2019, 10:21:36 am »

Much sadness in the Beardy household this morning as Dr Beardy (Mrs) has finally given up the fight and has withdrawn her name from the register of nurses in the U.K.

She hasn’t practiced for 15 years, and has been maintaining her registration with her teaching. But her teaching has become less relavent and she has also been given insight¹ into how the profession has moved on both of which has lead to her accepting that she couldn’t go back to the wards even if she wanted to. But she’s been on the register all her working life and so it’s a bit of a wrench giving it up.

I’ll take her out for a cup of tea and cake to commiserate.

1. As many of you know, Ms Beardy the younger is a registered nurse, and tales of her deering do are common currency around the Beardy dinner table.

chrisbainbridge · « **Reply #23692 on:** 20 January, 2019, 11:49:32 am »

my condolences.

ian · « **Reply #23693 on:** 20 January, 2019, 05:01:38 pm »

Quote from: Kim on 18 January, 2019, 02:57:24 pm

Every now and then some naive young web developer ends up being employed by one and, if they manage to escape, shares their tales of horror from working on another planet...

Loads of free booze though. And fruit and sundry food. Our mothership shared the same building as Grey London (we've relocated to somewhere less cool now). We used to wander in and take the beer from their reception.

Clare · « **Reply #23694 on:** 21 January, 2019, 05:19:48 pm »

I have just introduced my colleagues to the llama song and now I am going home.

Wowbagger · « **Reply #23695 on:** 21 January, 2019, 05:34:38 pm »

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2019/jan/21/ancient-scottish-stone-circle-was-built-in-1990s

I found that rather amusing.

Quite a few years ago I posted a photo I had taken in another part of Aberdeenshire, just to the west of Braemar. I was looking into the Dee valley where a red deer stag was up to its haunches in water. In the foreground was a small stone circle. I remember thinking at the time "That stone circle looks like a new one to me!" I wonder if it could have been the work of the same bloke?

Edit:

hellymedic · « **Reply #23696 on:** 21 January, 2019, 06:48:52 pm »

I was going to post this https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-north-east-orkney-shetland-46946652 but found WB had pipped me with the same story from another source.

Been waiting for a cab to take me to a meeting but no cabs = no meeting.

Tim Hall · « **Reply #23697 on:** 22 January, 2019, 11:15:39 pm »

The ring tone on the phone belonging to the ~~guard~~ on board supervisor on my train into Horsham the other day sounded like a steam engine, in the manner of Casey Jones and The Cannon Ball Express.

This pleased me greatly.

T42 · « **Reply #23698 on:** 23 January, 2019, 08:14:16 am »

Quote from: Tim Hall on 22 January, 2019, 11:15:39 pm

The ring tone on the phone belonging to the ~~guard~~ on board supervisor on my train into Horsham the other day sounded like a steam engine, in the manner of Casey Jones and The Cannon Ball Express.

This pleased me greatly.

Cudzoziemiec · « **Reply #23699 on:** 23 January, 2019, 08:31:56 am »

"Train manager" is the official title of some of them. Some of them still are guards though, while others have other titles.